Crash Course
by just slummin
Summary: NOW COMPLETE.  MalRiver.  This is part of a continuing MalRiver storyline.  Takes place three months after the events of Bloodlines.
1. Chapter 1

**Crash Course**

**Part I—Seizure**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: I own none of these characters. But I love them just the same.

Rating: PG13

Summary: Takes place three months after the events of "Bloodlines". Another night passes on Serenity, and as happens with startling regularity, a complication develops.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal scratched absently at the edges of the new scar on his chest. Thing was mostly healed, but still itched a mite, though River had been diligent about applying all manner of lotions and creams to the spot. Mal did not mind, as generally such ministrations on her part meandered well beyond the site of the injury and into altogether more pleasurable directions. Smiling at the thought, he opened the hatch to his bunk, and climbed down. As his feet hit the floor, he was suddenly surrounded by the graceful arms and legs of his agile wife.

"I'm takin' it you're happy to see me," he said, as her nimble fingers pushed his suspenders down and his shirt off his shoulders in what had to be some sort of speed record.

"Mmm hmm," River hummed against his neck, as she reached for the buttons of his pants.

Mal moaned as her mouth trailed down his chest and abdomen. In the last week or so, River's slight bouts of morning sickness had given way to a downright decadent eagerness for physical intimacy. While Mal suspected that technically it was due less his charms than a hormonal fluctuation, he was definitely not complaining with the results. As River's hands and mouth continued their journey, Mal gasped. Hauling her up his body, he murmured, "Whoa there, darlin'. Least let me get outta my boots first. As I understand it, a gentleman don't engage in these kinda…activities whilst his boots are on."

River pushed him toward their bed, steadying him when he stumbled over the pants she'd pushed to his knees. "Not interested in a gentleman right now, ai ren," she said, bending to pull off his boots once he'd fallen onto the bed heavily. As she climbed up beside him, Mal cupped her breasts, fuller now with the pregnancy. River shivered with anticipation and leaned forward, giving him better access to the newly sensitive skin there. Replacing his hands with his mouth, Mal let his hand rest for a moment on the soft skin of her belly, where a growing curve was the only indication of his child within her. Moving with a fluid grace, River flipped over onto her back, pulling her husband along with her.

"Please, ai ren," she whispered, canting her hips impatiently.

Looking down into the enchanting depths of her brown eyes, Mal knew there was nothing in the 'verse he would deny this woman. Slipping his knees between her parted thighs, he said, "Whatever you say, darlin'."

XXXXXXXXXX

After gently sliding Anya's door closed with a final warning to quit reading under her covers and go to sleep, Zoe turned to see Jim Bowden watching with an amused expression. "She comes by it honest," he said, smiling. "Mom used to have to tell John the same thing when we were boys."

When Zoe didn't reply, he continued. "She sure is a special girl. You've done a wonderful job of helping her acclimate to a new family."

"She's a strong girl," Zoe replied impassively.

Jim cleared his throat. "You don't like me very much, do you?"

"I don't know you ," Zoe replied simply.

Jim gazed at her steadily with blue eyes that looked very much like Anya's. "You will," he said. And stepping past her, he headed to his bunk.

XXXXXXXXXX

Simon gently lifted Daniel from Kaylee's arms. Both mother and child had fallen asleep, and Simon was loath to wake either one. Caring for Daniel's needs was a twenty-four-hour-a-day job, and Kaylee was still recovering from both the physical and emotional trauma surrounding his birth. Simon himself was beyond exhaustion, and he could hardly imagine how Kaylee was managing to drag one foot in front of the other.

Placing his son carefully in the crib, Simon turned to look at Kaylee more closely. Though there were purple shadows under her eyes, he found her altogether the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. She shifted in the rocker, as if she could sense the weight of his gaze, even in sleep. Simon lifted her carefully out of the chair, and laid her on their bed. Her eyelids fluttered sleepily. "Hey you," she said, yawning. "Everything okay?"

"Everything's fine," Simon reassured her, kissing her cheek. "Go back to sleep."

"'Kay."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I don't know that Mal will agree to go that far into the Core," Inara said, sitting on Jayne's bed. "I mean, considering the patrols now."

"Won't know 'til ya' ask," Jayne said, though he secretly hoped Mal would say no. He really didn't mind Inara taking clients, but the new contract she'd been offered would involve an entire week with her client, and somehow the thought didn't sit well with him. It was one thing to sex a client for the night, and quite another to spend a whole week with him, Jayne thought.

"I wouldn't even consider it," Inara was saying, oblivious to Jayne's line of thought. "Except that he's one my oldest clients and he's offering well beyond what I would have asked. One week, and I could pay the shuttle rent to Mal for an entire year."

"Yup, sounds like a good deal," Jayne said without enthusiasm as he climbed into bed beside her. Turning his back to her, he pulled up the covers and turned out the light, leaving Inara to wonder vaguely if there was something wrong.

XXXXXXXXXX

Deep in Serenity's night, River woke up gasping. Mal was instantly wide awake. "What's the matter, bao bei?" he asked, grabbing her shoulders to get her attention.

"Daniel," River said, jumping out of bed and slamming into her clothes hurriedly.

Mal's mouth went dry as he quickly dressed as well. Daniel Tam had been holding his own since his birth, though the past three months had been fraught with one crisis after another. His little lungs had finally developed to the point that he was no longer dependent on additional oxygen, but that had come only after a bout of pneumonia that had almost cost the little one his life. A terrible case of colic had kept the entire ship awake for a month, listening to the pitiful cries of the infant. Only in the past few weeks had everyone begun to breathe a little easier, as Daniel had been visibly progressing beyond the problems caused by his premature entry into the 'verse.

Racing into the infirmary ahead of her husband, River came to a stop beside Simon. Bent over his child, Simon spared no glance for his sister, but continued to work feverishly.

Mal moved beside Kaylee, pulling the trembling woman into his arms. Looking only at her husband and child, she spoke woodenly. "He just made a little gurgling sound. That's all, just one little gurgling sound. Then he stiffened up and his eyes just rolled back in his head. Never made even one little cry." Her words tapered off in shock and bewilderment.

"He's breathin', mei mei," Mal said, his own eyes fixed on the labored rise and fall of the thin little chest.

Simon straightened himself, looking up at Kaylee. "Yes, he is, ai ren."

"Is he…all right?" Kaylee asked fearfully, her voice cracking on the last words.

"He had a seizure," Simon said tiredly.

"Why?" Kaylee asked.

Simon shook his head. "I don't know yet. His temperature was not elevated, so it wasn't a febrile seizure. I need to do some tests to give a better answer." As he spoke, Daniel's body jerked, his back bowing off the bed as another seizure began. Mal and Kaylee watched helplessly as the child twitched under Simon's hands. "River," Simon said hoarsely. "Get me the…"

River handed the medication to him before he could complete the sentence, and Simon prepared the injection. In scant moments, Daniel's body relaxed and his eyes fluttered open. Giving a pitiful whimper, he curled into a fetal position.

Almost afraid to break the sudden silence, Mal whispered, "Doc?"

Simon scrubbed his hands across his face as if to clear away cobwebs there. "He should sleep now. Seizures, especially two so close together, will have worn him out, and the anti-seizure drug should do the rest. I'll start on the tests to determine the cause before I can figure out how to really treat him. I can't keep giving him the meds we have onboard. They're designed for adults, not infants."

"What do you need me to do?" Mal asked.

"Nothing," Simon replied. "At least not yet. Maybe you could take Kaylee back to our room…"

Kaylee lifted her chin defiantly. "Ain't gonna leave here 'til we know somethin', Simon Tam." She pulled away from Mal, and went to her son's side. "He needs his mama."

Simon nodded. "Of course, you're right. Sorry I suggested it."

River and Mal stepped outside to give the couple some time alone with their son.

XXXXXXXXXX

Daniel's seizures continued through the night, and by morning the entire crew had gathered in the infirmary.

"Any clue as to what's goin' on, doc?" Mal asked, unconsciously holding onto his own son a little more tightly.

"Yes," Simon said tiredly. "There's a congenital malformation, very slight, wouldn't have even noticed it if I wasn't looking for it specifically." Observing the worried expressions around him, Simon continued. "As I told Kaylee, it can be repaired. It's a delicate procedure, but I can do it. At least, I can if we can get our hands on the proper equipment."

Mal nodded, pleased to hear something he might be able to do something about. "Whereabouts is this equipment?"

Simon leaned against the counter, dreading his next words. "The nearest place I'm aware of is Osiris. They have three fully stocked neurosurgical units for pediatrics."

Jayne frowned. "We're near three weeks from Osiris, ain't we?"

"Two weeks, five days," River confirmed. "And without enough fuel to get there."

"Unless we go ahead and finish the St Albans delivery and get our coin," Mal noted. "Don't look to me like we've got the time for such as that, though."

"There is something we can do to buy some time," Simon said. "There's a new drug, and enhanced form of dilantin formulated for children, that would probably halt the seizures more effectively than what I have, at least in the short term."

"Fair certain St. Albans won't have it," Mal said. "Planet's backward and poor."

"I imagine you're right," Simon agreed. "But the Skyplex will. There's a brisk business in black market drugs there, and it's only a couple of days away."

"Less, if we go to full burn," Kaylee added, cradling Daniel to her chest.

"And you're sure it'd buy the time the little fella needs?" Mal asked.

"Yes," Simon answered confidently.

"Could maybe do both things at once," Mal said. "If we load the cargo onto the extra shuttle, St. Albans ain't but a day away. Shuttle goes to St. Albans, Serenity goes to Skyplex. Rendezvous back once the deals are done. Zoe, Jim, you two are with me in the shuttle. Jayne, you see the doc gets his meds and makes the deal in one piece, dong ma?"

"Yeah," Jayne said. "Not a problem."

"Then let's get the shuttle loaded. Ma shong."

As the crew dispersed quickly, Mal went to his bunk. Retrieving the small strongbox under his bed, he emptied the contents into a small leather pouch, leaving a very meager bit for himself. Then, he headed back to the infirmary, where Simon and Kaylee sat together looking after their son.

Motioning Simon outside, Mal slid the infirmary door shut and looked compassionately at the exhausted man. "You know anything 'bout buyin' from black market dealers, Simon?"

"I…I know what they're asking for the dilantin," Simon answered uncertainly.

"You got the coin?" Mal asked.

"Yes, just barely," Simon admitted.

Mal nodded, pressing the leather pouch into Simon's hands. "Take this, just in case. Price goes up without warnin' sometimes if the hundans know you need it bad enough."

Simon opened the pouch, his eyes widening when he saw the coin there. "Mal, I can't…this must be all your…I can't take this."

Mal closed the pouch and pressed it back into Simon's palms. "That's my nephew in there, and the newest member of my crew besides. And while I trust Jayne to handle a fight, he ain't exactly a master at negotiatin' without violence, and I ain't gonna be there to do it myself. So, I'm trustin' you to use this and get yourself back in one piece. Dong ma?"

Simon nodded, suddenly overwhelmed by the tangle of emotions the last several hours had brought to the fore. Swallowing audibly, he said, "Thank you, Captain."

Mal nodded shortly, and turning on his heel, made his way to the cargo bay, hoping to God that Simon would be able to handle himself on the Skyplex.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	2. Chapter 2

**Crash Course**

**Part II—The Split**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: I own a few of the characters in this story, but mostly I'm playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Mal and his team get ready to leave for St. Albans, and Kaylee has a little talk with her son.

XXXXXXXXXX

River cornered Mal in the cargo bay. "I don't like this plan, Mal," she said, looking up at him worriedly.

Mal snapped to attention. "You seein' somethin' I should know about?"

"No," River answered. "Just don't like the idea of you being away from the ship right now."

Mal pulled her to him gently. Resting his cheek on the top of her head, he said, "I ain't overfond of the idea myownself, bao bei. But Simon needs those drugs sooner than not, and if we don't make the delivery to St. Albans in time, there's a decent chance our fee'll be cut. That happens, we can't fuel the ship proper and get Daniel to Osiris. I ain't willin' to risk it, are you?"

River nodded her head sadly. "I could go with you. Zoe could stay here and pilot Serenity."

"Your brother's gonna need you here," Mal said kindly. "And I want you here too. Me and Zoe'll be back 'fore you know it. Well, maybehaps not before you know it, bein' as how you're a Reader, but still pretty gorram quick." He could see that his attempt at humor did not go very well.

"You could at least take Jayne, in case there's trouble at the drop point. Jim could go with Simon." 

Mal shook his head. "Don't know Jim well enough just yet I'm apt to leave him with my ship to handle things. Best he goes with me for now."

River sighed, knowing she was fighting a losing battle. "All right, ai ren," she conceded. "Just promise me you'll be careful."

Mal flashed her a winning grin. "Do my darnedest, darlin'," he said, grabbing a crate to help load the shuttle.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jim whistled in appreciation when Jayne pulled back the blanket covering his impressive array of weapons. "Looks like there's enough here to mount a fairly decent revolution," he said in amazement.

"Never do know when you might need one," Jayne said, running his hands lovingly along the guns and knives. "Figured you might need a little more ordinance than you got, if'n you're supposed to be watchin' Mal's back on St. Albans. Man can get in more trouble than you can see comin' most of the time."

"So I'm noticing," Jim said wryly. "What would you suggest I take?"

Jayne pulled a large duffel bag from under his bunk and began to select the weapons. "You can get the ammo from ship's arsenal. Mal pays for the bullets,' he said.

Jim ran his hand appraisingly over one of the guns Jayne had selected for him. "This one's a real beauty."

"Yeah," Jayne agreed. "That there's Jolene."

Jim chuckled. "You say that like there's a story there I'd love to hear."

Jayne smiled slightly. "Little too long for the tellin' right now. Mebbe when you get back, if you don't get yerself killed first."

"I'll look forward to hearing it," Jim answered mildly.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Least we won't have to pack as many rations without Jayne along," Zoe said dryly, as she and Mal finished their preparations for departure.

"You sanguine about how Jim's gonna work out?" Mal asked. As Zoe raised one eyebrow, he said, "Yes, I remember what it means. Don't look so shocked."

"Never doubted it, sir," she replied, though her expression clearly said otherwise. "As for Jim, I got no cause to doubt him."

"And no cause to trust him either," Mal finished her thought.

"That's about the size of it."

"Well, I conjure between the two of us we can handle things either way," Mal said easily.

"Need Mr. Jim." Adam climbed up into the shuttle to attach himself to Mal's leg.

"That a fact?" Mal asked, sweeping the two-year-old into his arms.

"Yep," Adam said, looking at his father with impossibly blue eyes. Putting his little hands on either side of Mal's face, he continued, "Wish you weren't goin', but Mama said you got to."

"Your mama's right," Mal said, smiling. "But I'll be back soon's I can, and then we'll be able to get the things little Daniel needs."

Adam's expression saddened. "Daniel's scared. Doesn't understand."

"He tell you that?" Mal asked.

Adam rolled his eyes, the expression so much like River's that it left Mal momentarily breathless. "He can't talk, Daddy. He's only a baby."

"Good point," Mal said, kissing the tip of his son's nose. "Guess you just sorta…feel it."

Adam nodded. "Uh huh," he answered.

"Well, you'll just have to be extra careful to help make him feel not so scared, then," Mal said, setting the boy down on his sturdy little legs. "Think you can look after Mama whilst I'm gone, too?"

"I will," Adam said. "And Miss Zoe and Mr. Jim will look after you."

"That we will, little one," Zoe said, ruffling Adam's hair. "Run and get Anya for me, please. I need a good-bye hug 'fore we take off."

"Yes, ma'am," Adam said, tearing out the door on his mission, feeling very important indeed.

XXXXXXXXXX

River sat on Serenity's bridge absently stroking her rounded abdomen as she watched the shuttle detach and head toward St. Albans. Turning her attention back to her own task, she headed Serenity to the Skyplex.

"You okay up here?" Inara asked, peering through the doorway.

"Fine," River replied, easing Serenity's speed up gradually. "Just wish we didn't have to split up to get everything done."

Inara nodded, slipping gracefully into the room. Sitting down in the co-pilot's chair, she looked carefully at River. "He doesn't ever want to be away from you either, you know," she said softly. "He loves you very much."

River turned her complete attention to the Companion. "Yes, he does," she answered simply. "As I do him."

Inara looked out Serenity's glass at the Black. "It's a puzzle to me," she said, almost wistfully. "What is it that makes two people choose to spend their lives together? Makes them know that they've found someone else in the 'verse that completes them?"

Discerning Inara was no longer talking about Mal, River sighed. "There is no science to it, though I suppose a case could be made that there are certain chemical and physiological components to a successful mating. The real reasons can't be quantified, nor even vaguely understood, I imagine."

Inara smiled at the younger woman. "You sound like an old mystic by the fire," she said.

"It is mystical in a way," River said. "Don't you find it so?"

Inara glanced at her sharply. "Me?" she asked.

River rolled her eyes. "Yes, you," she answered. "And Jayne."

Inara shifted uncomfortably in her chair. "What Jayne and I have…it isn't like you and Mal."

"Doesn't have to be," River said calmly. "Shouldn't be, in point of fact, since none of us are like the others. But it is strong, and deep, and wide. I feel it, from both of you."

"Perhaps too strong, sometimes," Inara whispered, unaware she'd said the words aloud.

"No such thing as too strong," River said. "Has to be strong to survive everything the 'verse tends to throw at it." Sensing Inara's thoughts, she added, "And you're wrong. Loving Jayne is not a weakness. It's one of your greatest strengths."

Inara was strangely moved by the words of the younger woman. Sighing raggedly, she said, "How did you come to be so wise, at such a tender age?"

"Learned about love from an excellent teacher," River answered, smiling impishly. "And I was an eager pupil." She turned back to check her console, and relaxed back into her chair. A companionable silence descended on the bridge, as the two women stared out into the Black.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal flipped switches, idly, thinking that the last day had been the quietest one he'd had in a long while. Zoe, never talkative at the even the best of times, had barely strung three sentences together. And Jim had spent his time basically watching the stars pass by.

Mal had hoped that Jim would be a good fit for his crew, and the truth of the matter was that he had done absolutely nothing to cause Mal to lose that hope. But neither had he done anything much to bolster the idea, unless one considered the fact that he had saved the lives of Mal, Zoe, and Jayne on their first meeting. And Mal most assuredly did remember that. It was proving, so far, to be the deciding factor in Mal's choice to allow the man to stay.

He was a pleasant enough sort, Mal thought. Not nearly as loud or mouthy as Jayne. And he never questioned Mal's orders, responding with the long habit of obedience many former soldiers possessed. But, with the exception of his interactions with Anya, Jim did not seem at ease among the other crew members yet, though he had been on Mal's boat for three months. Maybehaps it was time for him to spend some time with his new crewman, Mal thought, as he began the landing sequence. Making a mental note to do just that when they returned to Serenity, Mal said, "Zoe, Jim, get ready. We'll be at the drop in a few minutes. Look sharp."

XXXXXXXXXX

Kaylee looked down at her son lovingly, wondering how such a tiny body could survive the seizures that had been ripping through it for the past two days. Simon had altered the med dosages as much as he could to slow the onset of the seizures, but still Daniel was either lethargic from exhaustion or in the throes of the violent spasms. Kaylee stroked the baby's cheek gently, rousing him long enough to suckle for a few minutes at a time.

Kaylee sighed, pulling her hair behind her ears as Daniel drank. "For a little guy," she whispered gently, "You've sure got a way of wearin' out several full-grown folk. Ain't ever seen your Daddy so tired as he was 'fore I sent him off to bed. Not even when your Aunt River used to get so bad off."

Daniel looked up at his mother, the blue of his eyes just beginning to change to a shade of green. Despite the meds, his eyes were bright and inquisitive. His tiny hand moved clumsily up to rest on the side of her breast as his cheeks puffed in and out over her nipple.

"Your Daddy's gonna get you everything you need to make it all better," Kaylee said, as much to comfort herself as the child. "And then, after everything's shiny and fixed up just right, you're gonna grow and learn to walk, and run, and play with Anya and Adam and whoever your other little cousin turns out to be. And then one day, I'll show you all Serenity's workin's, and your Uncle Mal will teach you all about the Black, and Aunt River'll show you how to fly. And you'll be strong and handsome like your Daddy, and all the girls'll wanna dance with you when we're dirtside."

She didn't even notice that she was crying until a tear splashed across Daniel's forehead. The baby wrinkled his brow and scrunched up his face at the strange sensation. Wiping the moisture gently away with the pad of her thumb, Kaylee sniffled. "All those things are gonna happen for you, sweetie, if'n I can do anything about it. I swear."

Daniel looked intently at her and gurgled happily. Kaylee leaned her head against the back of the rocker and closed her eyes for just a moment. Feeling the cruel jerk of her son's body, her eyes flew open just in time to see another seizure begin.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	3. Chapter 3

**Crash Course**

**Part III—Desperate Measures**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: The main characters aren't mine. Just using them for a bit.

Rating: PG13

Summary: The shuttle team completes their delivery, and Simon and Jayne visit the Skyplex.

XXXXXXXXXX

The shuttle set down with a jarring thud on St. Albans, tumbling a stack of crates to the deck. Zoe gave Mal a long-suffering look. "Ground come up a little faster than you thought, sir?" she asked dryly.

"Matter of fact, yes," Mal said defensively. "Thought I'd be settin' down in soft snow, not packed ice."

Jim watched the exchange with one eye while pulling on his coat. "St. Albans isn't exactly a hot spot, is it?" he observed.

"Best as I can figure, it snows all the gorram time," Mal said, adjusting the collar of his own coat to block the wind he could hear whistling outside. "I ain't all that fond of the cold. Let's just do the deal, and leave 'fore the storm gets here."

"What storm is that, sir?" Zoe asked, her brow wrinkling with suspicion.

"Saw the report about an hour ago on the cortex. Local weather station predictin' a blizzard to hit sometime today."

When Zoe stepped out of the shuttle, she had no trouble believing a blizzard was coming. Her eyes instantly tearing in the frigid air, she saw the warehouse up ahead. A small group of men bundled in heavy coats came out to meet them.

Mal stuck out his hand and instantly regretted his lack of gloves. "Good to see ya', Mr. Travis," he said to the man in charge.

"Weren't sure you'd make it 'fore the weather got too dicey," Travis said admiringly, pumping Mal's hand in the process. "Got the whole shipment on that shuttle?"

"Right down to the last bolt," Mal said, relieved to be able to stick his hand back in his pocket.

"Come on in the office and have a cup of joe whilst the men help your folks unload. Ain't no sense in standin' about out here gettin' froze to death." Travis turned toward the office with Mal trailing along behind.

"Might have to have that coffee another time," Mal said apologetically. "We need to get back in the air soon's we can. Wouldn't do us any good to get stranded here by the storm."

"Can't say as I blame you for that," Travis said, looking up at the sky. "Looks to be a bad one comin' in. But least step inside long enough to get yer pay."

Mal complied, glad that there had been no mention of re-negotiating the price, as so often happened. Hurriedly sticking the pouch inside his coat pocket, he shook Travis' hand and went back outside to help the men with the unloading. The wind was picking up and Mal's old wounds began to throb with the freezing temperatures. Within the hour, the crates had been neatly stacked in the small warehouse and the men stood around rubbing their hands together and stamping their feet to encourage circulation.

Mr. Travis came out of his heated office to clap Mal on the back once again. "Looks like everything's in order, Captain Reynolds. We'll be sure to call on ya' again when we have need of reliable transport."

"You do that," Mal said.

"Sure you won't stay on long enough to get yerself warmed up?"

"I conjure we'd best be goin'," Mal said. "We'll get warm in the shuttle Still lookin' to beat the storm."

Mr.Travis nodded. "I understand. Prolly don't want to get snowed in with the likes of us for weeks. Godspeed, Captain, 'til we meet again."

Keeping their heads tucked down to lessen the wind's impact, Mal, Zoe, and Jim walked as rapidly as they could back to the shuttle. Once inside, Mal powered it up, turning on the heat full blast.

"Can see why Tracey wanted to get his parents offa this rock," Zoe said, brushing snow and ice out of her long hair.

"Yeah," Mal agreed, slipping off his coat as the shuttle began to warm. "Though it wasn't as bad last time we were here. Maybehaps we just need to time our arrival in a non-blizzard season of the year." Checking to see that his crew was strapped in, he pulled the yoke, and the shuttle lifted gracefully in the air.

"You're a little bit better at the taking off than the landing," Jim observed with a trace of humor in his tone.

Mal snorted. "Might be even better than this if I could see out the gorram window for all the snow."

Climbing to a higher altitude, Mal held the yoke tightly as he strained to see where they were going. The console instruments were sluggish for some reason, and he wondered if perhaps his earlier landing had jarred something slightly out of place.

A sudden updraft buffeted the shuttle punishingly, and the power flickered for a moment. Fighting to stabilize the shuttle's trajectory, Mal said tersely, "We've lost navigation. We're flyin' blind."

For one surreal moment, the three looked out at the swirling maelstrom of snow through the glass. Then, as if by some unseen magic, the sky cleared just long enough for them to see a horrifying sight. Zoe looked at Mal, seeing the muscles of his forearms straining in sharp relief as he fought with the yoke, trying to gain more altitude.

"We're not gonna make it," she said flatly, two seconds before the shuttle crashed into the side of the terraforming tower and, spiraling into a stomach-lurching spin, plummeted three hundred feet to the icy ground below.

XXXXXXXXXX

Simon and Jayne threaded their way through the crowds on the Skyplex looking for the meeting spot designated by the drug dealers. Simon was functioning only on adrenaline, having gone well beyond exhausted caring for Daniel during their trip.

"Ya' gotta stop with the fidgeting," Jayne said, hyper-alert to his surroundings as he always was on a job.

Simon instantly dropped his hands to his sides to comply, though the compulsion to fiddle with his strange clothing was still there. "I don't see why I couldn't wear my own clothes," he said snappishly. "Perhaps I would have been more comfortable, at least."

Jayne snorted, looking at Simon's coarsely-woven cotton shirt and cargo pants. "If'n these hundans had seen your fancy Core duds, the price woulda' gone up at least ten percent right off."

Simon didn't reply, conceding the logic of Jayne's idea. "Looks like it's up ahead," he said, eyeing the dimly lit alleyway they were approaching.

"Lemme go in first, doc," Jayne said, stepping in front of the smaller man. "Check out the landscape."

Simon stepped back, in perfect agreement with that plan. Jayne slipped stealthily into the shadows, and Simon had the incongruous thought that there was a certain poetry to the merc's motions. Shaking the notion out of his head, he followed Jayne as quietly as he could manage.

Soon they were enmeshed in the maze of side streets and half-opened doorways which revealed things that made Simon's ears turn red. "See you ain't much for the red-light district," Jayne whispered, his teeth gleaming white in the low light. "Don't reckon you've had much occasion to be in one."

"No," Simon replied dryly. "My horizons have definitely broadened since I've been on Serenity." 

Jayne chuckled. "'Spect that's so." He stopped, pointing to a doorway a few feet from where they stood. "Looks like we're here. You ready?"

Simon took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. "I'm ready. Let's do it."

Jayne nodded. Fingering Vera lovingly, he stepped to the door and gave a low knock.

"Ching jin," a rough voice called out.

Simon and Jayne stepped through the doorway into a room bare of furniture but for a table and two chairs, lit by a single naked bulb hanging from a chain. A very thin man unfolded his lanky frame and stood to meet them. "What's your business here?" he asked unpleasantly.

Simon cleared his throat. "I'm Simon Tanner. I was told to come here by a Mr. Jones. He has a package for me, I believe."

The thin man stretched his lips in a caricature of a smile, motioning two men standing in the shadows of the room to move forward. "That a fact?' he said. "And what exactly is it you expect to be in this package?"

Simon began, "It's a dru…"

Jayne interrupted. "Cut to the chase. You Jones or ain'tcha'?"

The man looked at Jayne with eerily pale blue eyes. "I am Mr. Jones. And I do not enjoy being interrupted during a conversation with a new client. It tends to sour the relationship before it can grow." His voice suddenly had an edge that made Simon's pulse race a bit.

"Pardon my…associate," Simon said. "He is not interested in the art of conversation. He's more of a man of action, so to speak."

"Yes, I can see that's true," Jones answered, eyeing Jayne appraisingly. "But no matter. On to the business at hand. I believe you said you might find this useful." Reaching into his pocket, he pulled a small ampule of clear medication out and threw it to Simon.

Simon caught it, pleased to see that his hands were not shaking too badly. Examining the labeling and the seal, he nodded. "Yes, this will do nicely. I'll take the full amount."

Jones looked at him coolly. "Well, there might be a slight problem with that," he said.

Feeling Jayne tense beside him, Simon replied with steel in his tone. "And what would that be?"

Jones opened a briefcase containing the vials so that Simon could see it clearly. "You're asking for my entire stock," he said, leaning his hip casually against the table. "And unfortunately for you, there is another buyer who needs a comparable amount. You must understand, Mr. Tanner, I am a businessman. I have to be confident I'm being compensated for the true worth of my inventory."

Simon tired to appear calm, though his heart was beating painfully against his ribcage. "How much?" he asked hoarsely.

"The other buyer is willing to pay forty percent more than your offer." Jones crossed his arms over his chest complacently.

Forty percent was well beyond Simon's ability to pay. Suddenly, everything in Simon's field of vision turned red as raw fury overtook the doctor. Pushed past his limit of endurance by the thought of losing the drugs to the avarice of the piece of human refuse before him, he lunged forward and grabbed Jones, pinning the startled man's arms to his chest as he retrieved a scalpel from one of the myriad pockets of his new pants.

Jayne recovered more quickly from the shock of Simon's sudden movement than the two men with Jones did, and he trained Vera on the one who looked most likely to cause trouble.

Simon jerked Jones away from the table, putting the man's body between him and his two guards. "Tell your men to drop their weapons," Simon said, his voice deceptively calm.

"Not likely," Jones replied belligerently. "Your man can't take out both of them before they kill you."

"Yeah," Jayne said casually, Vera not wavering even a little. "I can."

Simon smiled, pressing the flat of his scalpel against Jones' jugular vein. "He is quite skilled with his gun," he said, almost conversationally. "Almost as skilled as I am with this scalpel." He made a small adjustment to the angle of the blade, and Jones hissed as a thin line of blood appeared on his pale neck. Simon went on. "Now tell your men to drop their weapons."

There was a prolonged silence, as everyone in the room calculated the odds of success. At last, Simon spoke again. "Now it seems to me that we should be able to do this without anymore violence. You and I had an agreement. Honor it."

Jones grimaced, trying subtly to loosen Simon's iron grip, but the doctor had all the strength of a desperate man on his side. "George," Jones said to one of his men, "Take 'em ou…"

Before the words were finished, Jayne fired, dropping George to the ground with a gaping hole in his throat. The second man, unwilling to die for his hundan of a boss, threw his weapon to the ground and raised his hands in the universal gesture of surrender.

"You worthless son of a whore," Jones spat at the man angrily, struggling openly now against Simon's grip.

Jayne trained Vera on Jones. "You want I should kill him, Simon?"

Simon shook his head, his blood rage abruptly dissipated in the aftermath of the gun blast. Turning to the second man, he said, "Have you got any rope?"

The man nodded quickly, eager to be in the good graces of his captors. Retrieving a length of rope from the corner, he held it up. "This enough?"

Simon slammed Jones into the chair. "Tie him up."

"You're gonna regret this, you little…" Jones began.

"And gag him," Simon interrupted.

Once the job was accomplished to Simon's satisfaction, he turned to the second man. "I need you to sit down as well," he said smoothly.

"Come on," the man pleaded. "Just let me go. You leave me here and he gets loose 'fore me, he'll kill me sure as spittin'."

"He said sit down," Jayne said darkly. The man quickly complied, his plea dying on his dry lips. As Jayne secured the bindings, Simon closed the briefcase. Tucking it under his arm, he turned to the second man and slipped the scalpel carefully between his fingers. "Make sure you get free first," he said, heading out the door with Jayne following behind him.

The two men walked back to Serenity in silence. Once they were inside, Simon headed straight to the infirmary.

"Didn't know you had it in you, doc," Jayne called out after him.

"Daniel's my son," Simon answered simply, leaving the merc to stare after him with something close to admiration.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	4. Chapter 4

**Crash Course**

**Part IV—The Shuttle**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Not making money. Just playing with my favorite characters a bit.

Rating: PG

Summary: Mal regains consciousness after the shuttle crash.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal opened his eyes slowly, half-expecting to see the flames of hell licking at his boots. But it was way too cold to be hell, he figured, as he tried to make out his surroundings. After several disoriented minutes, he realized he was in Serenity's spare shuttle, and flashes of memory returned abruptly. The delivery to St. Albans, the storm, the tower, and Oh God, the horrifying sound of metal crumpling, the high-pitched screech of the shuttle spiraling downward out of control, and the bone-snapping sudden collision with the ground three hundred feet below.

Trying to steady the ragged breathing that accompanied those mental images, he found that he was still strapped into the harness of the pilot's seat, but there seemed to be something wrong. He was hanging at a painful angle, and he realized that the back of the seat must have broken on impact, bending him backward with it in an unnatural position. Groping around in the dim emergency lighting of the shuttle, he found the harness release and pushed it down, freeing his torso. But when he tried to pull himself up, sharp pain radiated from his lower back, and he gasped with the sheer force of it. Caught as he was with his head below his legs, he felt the blood pounding in his temples and was abruptly light-headed. Knowing he was very close to losing consciousness again, he reached around for something to use to pull himself free from the chair. Finding nothing within reach, he took several deep breaths and tried to calm the rapid beating of his pulse.

"Zoe?" he rasped, unable to see his first mate from the angle in which he had landed. There was no answer. Clearing his throat, he tried again, louder this time. "Zoe?"

He heard a muffled groan, and slight movement from somewhere behind him. "Zoe?" he called again. "You okay over there?"

It was Jim's voice that answered. "Looks like Zoe's still out, Captain, but I can see from here that she's still breathing, at least. You still alive over there?"

"Ain't rightly sure just yet," Mal replied mildly. "You?"

"Pretty much the same," Jim said raggedly. "Still trying to get outta this gorram harness. Release isn't working. Must have gotten damaged in the crash."

Mal could hear the sounds of the man struggling to free himself. "Got a knife….in my boot, if I could just…" Jim stopped speaking, evidently maneuvering his body around to try to reach it. Grunting with the effort, Jim finally reached the blade, and Mal could hear the sound of the man sawing through the sturdy strap of the harness. After several long minutes, he heard the thump of a body hitting the floor, and a muffled groan followed by a string of blistering Mandarin.

"I'm takin' it you're loose," Mal said, relieved that his crewman was well enough to curse.

"Yeah," Jim said, coughing up a wet gob of clotted blood. "Think a few ribs might be broken though. And I'm spittin' blood." Too unsteady just yet to stand, he crawled forward into Mal's line of vision.

Mal winced when he saw the man. "Got a fair-sized gash on your forehead too," he said, wondering how the man could even open his eyes for the blood that had dried down his face and neck. "You look like go se."

Jim grimaced. "You're not exactly the picture of vibrant health either," he said, noting with concern the strange angle of Mal's spine.

Mal nodded. "'Spect I'd look a mite better if I could get outta this position."

Jim looked at him soberly. "Not quite sure how to go about that, Captain. Looks like your legs are pinned under the console pretty gorram tight."

Mal frowned, processing that information. He tried to pull his legs upward, but felt no response. Come to think of it, he thought with a vague sense of rising panic, he felt nothing at all from his navel to his toes. "Leastways help me get propped up some," he said. "Then maybehaps between the two of us we could…"

"Don't think that would be advisable just yet," Jim answered gently.

Mal looked into the man's eyes and saw much more than he wanted to see. Swallowing thickly, he said, "It look that bad?"

Jim nodded slowly. "Yes, I'm afraid it does. I'm sorry."

Mal took a deep breath. "Then you'd best go see to Zoe first."

Briefly touching Mal's shoulder in apology, Jim turned away without a word and crawled over to Zoe. She, too, was trapped in her harness, but fortunately the release mechanism was undamaged, and Jim was able to slide her inert form unto the floor with minimal effort. "I need a light," he said, his voice sounding unusually loud in the silence of the shuttle. "There's a lot of blood, but I can't tell where it's coming from."

"There's a storage compartment under the console," Mal said. "Should be a flashlight there, and a first aid kit, maybe."

After several long minutes of fumbling around in the dark and a series of grunts as Jim pried the crumpled door of the storage compartment open, Mal saw the bright beam of the flashlight bounce across the walls of the shuttle. Seeing just that little bit of the damage made his stomach churn uneasily.

"Ai ya," Jim muttered, peeling back Zoe's vest and shirt to reveal a jagged hole in her side, still oozing a small trickle of blood.

"What?" Mal asked. "How bad is she?"

"Bad enough," Jim answered. "Looks like something punctured her side, left a hole big enough for two fingers there."

"Pumpin' blood?" Mal heard the panic in his own voice as he contemplated losing Zoe in such a senseless way.

"No," Jim answered. "Just a little trickle now. But we musta' been out awhile, because she's covered in blood." Angling the light for a better view, he said, "Doesn't look like anything major's been hit though." He probed the wound gently. "Wish I had some gloves for this. Don't want it to get infected."

"Should be some antiseptic in the kit," Mal said, silently cursing his own inability to help his friend.

Jim worked silently, cleaning the area as best he could. Packing the wound with gauze, he wrapped a bandage around Zoe's waist to hold it in place. As he lifted her gently to secure the bandage, Zoe's eyes fluttered open momentarily. "Wash?" she whispered, thoroughly disoriented.

"No," Jim answered. "It's Jim."

Zoe blinked slowly, focus returning partially. "I ain't dead?' she croaked.

Jim chuckled lightly. "Not yet, though you've been working on it pretty steadily for awhile now, by the looks of it."

Zoe struggled to sit up. "Mal?" she asked.

"I'm here," Mal said, relieved beyond measure to hear her voice getting stronger by the minute. "Ain't exactly kickin', but I'm still here."

Suddenly dizzy, Zoe slumped against Jim's chest. He laid her down gently. "It would be best to be still for a bit," he said softly. "You've lost a lot of blood." Zoe nodded, shivering in the cold air of the shuttle. Crawling to her discarded coat, Jim arranged it over her. "Thanks," she murmured as her eyes began to close again.

"Don't mention it," Jim said, pausing to look at her a moment before crawling back to the Captain.

"She out again?" Mal whispered.

"Yeah," Jim said. "Just as well too, I'm thinking. She's too weak to help me do what has to be done now anyway."

Mal nodded, grim determination on his face. "I'll help you. Still got the use of my arms, at least. Just need somethin' to pry my legs loose."

"If I move you now," Jim said, his face solemn, "it's likely to paralyze you permanently. From what I can see, I'd say there's a good chance your back's broken already."

Mal nodded. "Can't feel anything from my waist down," he admitted. "But I got no notion to keep lying bent backward like this. Even if I ain't ever gonna use 'em again, I'd just as soon my legs get unpinned, at least. Whatever damage the console's done to 'em, maybehaps Simon can fix it so's they don't have to be taken off. Dong ma?"

Jim nodded. "All right. Give me a minute to find something we can use for leverage." A few minutes later, he returned with two long pieces of shelf railing from the back of the shuttle. Setting them down beside Mal, he said, "You ready?"

Mal took a deep breath as Jim moved behind him. "I'm ready."

Jim slipped his hands under Mal's armpits and pulled him slowly into a sitting position. Mal screamed as a sharp burst of intense pain ripped through his battered body. Sweat beading on his forehead, he struggled to breathe through the agony.

Jim gasped in pain as he tried to support Mal's weight against his own bruised chest. "You okay, sir?" he asked when he could manage to speak again.

"Yeah," Mal said through clenched teeth. "Just give me a minute to get my balance." He leaned forward, hissing as he took his weight off the other man. Trembling with the effort, he sat balancing himself with his arms. From the new angle, he could see the devastation that Jim had already seen. The console rested squarely in his lap, having come loose from its attachments to the wall of the shuttle. He knew, without having to see more, that his legs were, at the very least, broken under the weight of the equipment. He ruthlessly suppressed the thought of what else he might discover under there.

Jim took one of the railing sections and jammed it under the console. Mal did the same, though he knew he would not be able to find much in the way of leverage in his current condition. "Ready?" he asked.

Jim nodded, and the two men tried to pry the wreckage of the console off of Mal's legs. By turns grunting and swearing, they managed to raise the console enough that they could see Mal's legs underneath. As Mal had already surmised, the femurs of both legs were broken, but he was somewhat relieved to see that the breaks looked to be fairly clean. His mouth suddenly dry at the sight, he asked grimly, "You think you can hold it up if I let go long enough to pull 'em free?"

"Think so," Jim said, adjusting his weight to lie across both metal railing pieces. "If you're fast enough."

Mal nodded, letting go of the bar, and in one graceless motion, swept both legs over to his side. Toppling to the deck with searing pain shooting through his upper body and no sensation at all in his lower half, Mal heard the crash of the console as it hit the floor beside him. Almost afraid to look, he opened his eyes to see that his legs had indeed cleared the console by as much as an inch. "Good job, Captain," Jim gasped, totally spent after their exertion.

"Thanks. You're not so bad yourself," Mal said, breathing as if he'd just run a marathon. As Jim helped him straighten his body into a less painful position, Mal said, "Best you rest a little while. When you're able, think you could find out if we got any power in this thing?"

"See what I can do," Jim answered with all the strength his could muster at the moment.

"Good man," Mal said, as the residual shock of his injuries took him out again.

XXXXXXXXXX

Simon and River stood looking down at the sleeping Daniel. "Drugs are working, at least for now," Simon whispered. "He should be all right until we can get to Osiris."

River turned to look at her brother. "Are you? All right, I mean?"

Simon sighed. "I almost killed three men today without even a moment's hesitation. Just snapped when I thought they were going to prevent me from getting Daniel's meds. Horrible rage just…welled up in me…like I was some kind of animal."

River's gaze was compassionate. "Even the human animal protects its young. It was a natural response."

"Was it?" Simon asked, his brow wrinkling at the thought.

"Yes," River answered simply, smoothing the wrinkle with the tip of one slender finger. "Good man, good father."

Simon smiled, hoping to ease her concern for him. "Thank you," he whispered.

But River was not listening, abruptly gripped by a strong sense of something gone terribly wrong.

"River?" Simon said, observing her sudden pallor. 'What's the matter?"

Before she could articulate an answer, Adam ran into the infirmary, eyes wide with panic. "Mama," he wailed, throwing himself into her arms. "Mama, Daddy hurts."

"I know, baby," she said as she looked up at Simon, her own eyes filled with urgency. "The shuttle crew is in trouble. Wake Kaylee. We need to go to full burn, now."

So saying, she ran to the bridge, clutching her child to her chest the whole way.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	5. Chapter 5

**Crash Course**

**Part V—Working It Through**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: They are not mine. They're just on loan temporarily.

Rating: PG

Summary: The shuttle crew works on their situation, and Serenity's crew finds itself in a quandary.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal awoke to the sound of muttered swearing coming from behind the wreckage of the console. "Everything all right over there?" he called out.

Jim popped his head up from the tangle of wiring. "Just too gorram shiny for words," he answered dryly. "How're you feeling?"

"Like I was in a helluva shuttle crash," Mal replied, matching his tone.

Jim stood up from behind the console and dusted his hands on his trousers. "Sounds about right."

Mal looked around, noting some small signs of improvement. "Zoe been up?"

"Yes," Jim said, moving out of Mal's line of vision as he walked toward the back of the shuttle. "She was up for awhile about an hour ago. Drank some water, ate a protein bar. She seemed a little better. I think her main problem is blood loss. Easily corrected, if we could get somewhere for help." He came to sit beside Mal, holding out a protein bar and a glass of water.

"Thanks," Mal said, wincing as he tried to prop himself on an elbow to eat and drink.

Jim slid behind Mal. "Here," he said. "Rest your weight against me. You've got one helluva bruise across your chest looks a lot like a yoke, but it didn't look like anything was broken."

Mal raised an eyebrow, taking a tiny sip of water. "And you'd be knowin' that how?"

"Unbuttoned your shirt to look."

"You been takin' advantage of me in my unconscious state?" Mal said with the barest hint of amusement in his tone.

Jim snorted. "That's right, Captain. I've just been biding my time until I could get you naked and have my wicked way with you." 

"Well," Mal replied in kind. "I'm fair certain today was not the best day ever for makin' use of this body o'mine." Caught by his own words, Mal's thoughts turned abruptly serious.

Sensing the sudden downturn of the Captain's mood, Jim said lightly, "Then I guess it's a good thing I lean toward the womenfolk."

Mal smiled half-heartedly. Changing the subject, he said, "Feels right much warmer in here now."

Jim nodded. "I was able to get some auxiliary power online. It's not perfect, but at least the heater's blowing warm air now instead of cold. And we should be warm enough for a long while anyway."

"Whaddya mean?" Mal asked, noticing Jim's somber expression.

"Can you hear the storm wind, Captain?" he asked.

Mal listened for a moment, realizing now that he had not heard any wind since awakening the second time. "No," he answered. "Guess the blizzard's blown over."

Jim shook his head. "I don't think so. From what I can tell, the shuttle's completely buried in snow. That's good for insulation purposes, but…"

"Bad for anyone comes lookin' for us," Mal answered.

"Exactly," Jim agreed.

Mal sighed heavily. "What about communications?"

"That's what I was working on when you woke up," Jim answered. "The board was damaged in the crash. I've been trying to cobble something together to get a signal out, but so far I've had no luck. Sorry, Captain."

Mal nibbled on his protein bar. "You've done a good job gettin' things as well under control as you have," he said, looking up at the man with genuine gratitude.

"Thank you, sir," Jim answered. "I'll keep working on it. Sooner or later I'll get it done. And as soon as Zoe's able, we'll see to setting your legs properly."

Mal looked down at his twisted legs and swallowed nervously. "You know 'bout settin' bones and such?"

"Learned a few little tricks during the war," Jim answered. "More about how to break a man's legs than to set them, but I'll do my best…with your permission, that is."

Mal finished the protein bar and the glass of water. "If it's all the same to you, I hope Simon'll be here 'fore you have to practice any more medicine."

Jim smiled. "So do I."

XXXXXXXXXX

Inara stood over River's shoulder, Adam on her hip clinging tightly to her dress, crushing the expensive fabric in his little fists. River bent over the console, staring into the swirling patterns of the blizzard that still raged over St. Albans. "We can't possibly fly into that," Inara said softly. "It would be suicide."

"They're down there," River said hollowly. "And they're hurt. Need Simon to fix them. Now."

Inara shivered, worried by the disjointed pattern of River's speech. The young woman had been at the helm for the entire trip back to St. Albans, pushing herself and Serenity past reasonable limits. "Sweetie," she tried again. "Let's at least find out what we can about how long the storm is predicted to last before we go in. It could just be a matter of hours."

River looked up at the woman with tears on her cheeks. "Hours are eternities. What if it were Jayne instead of Mal?"

Inara gulped convulsively. "Even if it were Jayne, I wouldn't endanger the lives of the rest of the crew knowing it was likely we would crash as well. Then who would there be to help any of us?"

"She's right," Simon said from the doorway.

Kaylee came up behind her husband, her face smudged with engine grease and tinged with sadness. "Storm force winds would likely tear the buffer panels clean off," she said. "Then we'd all be stranded down there. Serenity couldn't take breakin' atmo like that."

River turned back to the cortex screen, keying up the local weather forecast. "….expected to last through the next four hours," the announcer droned. "Officials request that all traffic to St. Albans be suspended for the duration of the storm."

A hush fell over the bridge, as they all contemplated waiting another four hours to retrieve their friends.

"Even if'n we was to try to fly through it," Jayne said, more subdued than usual, "you got any idea whereabouts to start lookin'?"

"No," River answered after a long moment. "I don't. But I think Adam might."

As all the adults turned their attention to him, the little boy nodded slowly. "I know where Daddy is," he said softly.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal clenched his jaw, for the briefest moment profoundly glad he could feel nothing from his waist down. Zoe, looking paler than death, gripped his right thigh, her knuckles gleaming white in the low light.

"You ready?" Jim asked, looking a little paler than normal himself.

"Ready," Zoe said, drawing in a deep breath.

Mal watched, sweat beading on his brow, as Jim tried to maneuver the bone back into place. The sound of bone grinding against bone made Mal regret the protein bar he'd eaten earlier, and he turned his eyes away, taking deep breaths to ride out the waves of nausea that threatened to overwhelm him. The sickening sound stopped, and Jim said, "I think that's got it. You okay, Zoe?"

"Is she okay?" Mal asked, drowning out Zoe's affirmative answer.

Jim glanced up at him, improbable hope in his eyes. "Did you feel that at all, Captain? Because if you did, that's…"

Mal interrupted him. "Didn't feel a thing," he said. "Just…the sound was…" 

Jim nodded, trying to hide his crestfallen expression. "Think you can stand to hear it one more time?" he asked carefully.

"Yeah," Mal said brusquely. "Just…get it over with soon's you can. Dong ma?"

"Of course," Jim said.

In a rare physical gesture, Zoe wiped Mal's brow gently. Looking up into the bottomless depths of her brown eyes, he saw the strength of her love and loyalty to him, and he drew what he needed from her as he always had done.

Jim watched the moment, struck motionless by the obvious interplay of emotion between the two. And he wondered, not for the first time, what had forged such a strong bond between them. He had seen his share of war buddies, and more than his share of lovers, but there was something more to what he was witnessing now, something he yearned to know one day for himself.

Abruptly aware he was staring, he cleared his throat. "Yeah, well, okay then," he said, breaking the moment between the Captain and the first mate. "Zoe, if you could just take the other thigh…"

Zoe moved to comply immediately, and nodded her head shortly when she was ready. Mal closed his eyes, picturing River and Adam and the little one on the way, anything and everything to avoid thinking about what was happening to his lower half. In a few minutes that seemed to stretch into a minor eternity, Jim said, "All right. I'm done."

Mal opened his eyes and looked down at his newly straightened legs. As Jim and Zoe made makeshift splints, he looked at the two carefully. "You're both lookin' a mite too pale for my likin'. Think maybehaps you'd best be gettin' some rest, now I'm all doctored up. I'll hold down the fort, such as it is."

Giving him strangely identical weary smiles, his people obeyed.

XXXXXXXXXX

Serenity hovered above the planet, everyone on board staring intently at Adam as the little boy communicated what he saw to his mother. River focused on her son, helping him to organize the images into something she could use to navigate the ship to the shuttle's location.

"Close your eyes, baby," she coached. "Just think about Daddy. What do you see?"

Adam scrunched his eyes shut, and let his mind reach out beyond the snow and ice, to the inside of the crumpled shuttle where Daddy lay still and quiet. He smiled. "Daddy's thinking about you, Mama," he whispered.

A lump rose in River's throat, threatening to overwhelm her tenuous hold on calm. "Is Daddy close to us?"

"Not yet," Adam said. "Closer than before though."

River nodded, sending him praise with her mind. 'Keep looking,' she thought. 'Tell Mama when we're there.'

No one spoke as mother and child focused together on the task at hand. Inara held Serenity steady in the upper atmosphere of St. Albans, feeling the winds losing strength beneath them and praying that they would completely dissipate before Adam found what they were all looking for.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jim scrubbed his hands over his face wearily. "This should at least get a small signal out," he told Mal. "Assuming that the storm has passed over, I think it may be enough that someone really looking might find us before the spring thaw."

"Good job," Mal said. "'Spect that's the best we could hope for, considerin' the shuttle's been beat to hell and back." Now that Jim had managed to restore full lighting, Mal could see the true extent of the damage to the shuttle. The entire aft side was folded like an accordion, and water trickled steadily through a series of hairline cracks in the hull. Mal was somewhat amazed that they were not all dead, and he knew unequivocally that the shuttle was well beyond repair. Glancing over at Zoe, he saw the same thoughts reflected in her eyes.

"Looks like we cheated death again, sir," she said calmly. "Assumin' Serenity's on its way, that is."

"I think it's safe to say they're comin'," Mal said. "Less things went pear-shaped at the Skyplex."

Jim looked up from the panel where he was working on a clump of tangled wiring. "You know," he said, sighing heavily, "You could have gone all day without saying that."

Mal and Zoe looked at each other and burst into laughter. Jim, holding his cracked ribs carefully, began to chuckle as well. "Remind me why I signed on with you people?" he asked, as the shuttle echoed with their laughter.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Here," Adam said suddenly, his eyes popping open with excitement. Inara moved from the pilot's chair, as River took the controls. Flipping several switches, she said, "He's right. There's a faint signal coming from almost directly below us."

"The storm winds have been lessening for awhile now," Inara said. "I could feel it in the controls."

Looking at the sight below them, Simon observed that there did seem to be a clearing in the atmosphere compared to their earlier pass. River glanced up at him, unsure if she could make the decision completely rationally, but trusting her brother to help her, as he always had.

"Then what are we waiting for?" he asked, fervently hoping that he was not consigning Serenity to her final resting place as River began the descent into the remnants of the storm.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	6. Chapter 6

**Crash Course**

**Part VI—The News**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: I'm playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Serenity lands on St. Albans, and the crew is finally reunited.

XXXXXXXXXX

"No offense, but are we sure the kid is right?" Jayne asked, standing in the swirling snow looking at a huge drift that resembled every other huge drift as far as he could see.

Kaylee consulted her small comm unit. "Yup, signal's comin' from somewheres over there," she said, pointing to the drift in question.

Jayne sighed, pushing his hat more firmly on his head. "Ain't we got nothin' can just melt the gorram snow quick-like?"

"Nothing that wouldn't potentially harm the people as well," Simon said, already shivering despite his coat and gloves. Handing Jayne and Kaylee a shovel apiece, he started to dig with one of his own. After thirty minutes, he tapped Kaylee on the shoulder. "Switch out with Inara. Go get warmed up."

Kaylee nodded, and Inara took her place. A half hour later, River replaced Inara, and as the work proceeded the snow stopped falling and the sky cleared enough for them to discern the vague outline of the shuttle beneath them. Leaving Anya to watch over Adam and Daniel, the adults all redoubled their efforts, encouraged as the shuttle was revealed in small sections. But when they began to see the extent of the damage to the craft, a solemn hush fell over the small group.

"Musta' fell from quite a height," Jayne observed grimly. Turning to look at River, he said, "You sure you want to be seein' this, River girl?"

River nodded, sniffling in the frigid air. "Alive," she said. "All of them. Shuttle can be replaced."

"You're sure they're alive?" Inara asked hopefully.

"For now," River replied, pushing her shovel determinedly into the hard packed snow.

XXXXXXXXXX

"You hear that?" Mal whispered, listening to the muffled metallic banging carefully.

"Sounds like the cavalry's arrived," Zoe said calmly.

"Either that or the wild animals in these parts got the use of metal tools," Jim answered, yawning widely and then wincing with the effort.

Mal shivered. The temperature in the shuttle was dropping rapidly as the insulating snow was removed by the crew, and the rewired heater could not compensate for the change. Knowing that it could take awhile yet for the crew to dig them out, Zoe crawled over to lie beside him, draping the thin blanket she had over them both. Mal made no objection. "How many times you suppose we did this during the war?" he asked softly, remembering freezing battlefields all over the 'verse with no blankets and only fellow soldiers for warmth.

"Hard to say," Zoe murmured, trying to keep her teeth from chattering.

Jim spooned in behind Zoe carefully, so as to protect his ribcage. "Easy for me to say," he said. "I never had anyone so pretty to conserve body heat with during the war."

Zoe snorted, sandwiched between the two men. "I can hurt you," she said lightly, though she thought secretly how wonderful the extra warmth felt against her back.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jayne and Simon pried the crumpled metal of the shuttle door open and quickly looked inside. "Well now, ain't that a sight to see?" Jayne grinned, as the three that were huddled together blinked in the sudden light. "Want us to come back later?"

Three sets of eyes shot withering looks in his direction, as Zoe and Jim untangled their limbs to stand. Seeing that Mal made no attempt to join them, Simon rushed to his side immediately. "What's going on here, Captain?"

"Looks like Jim's got a set of cracked ribs and the obvious gash on his head, Zoe's got a hole in her side big enough for two fingers, and my legs ain't currently workin'," he said succinctly.

Simon nodded, processing the information. "Field splints look good. I assume they've been broken?"

Jim spoke up. "Thigh bones both broken, but it looked to be a fairly clean break for both. Set them as best we could."

"Bet that was no fun without pain meds," Simon said sympathetically, observing Mal's pallor.

"Wasn't so bad," Mal replied. "Helped of course that I ain't got feeling just now below my belly." As he spoke, River slipped into the shuttle and dropped to her knees beside him.

"Kaylee, Inara," Simon called, realizing the seriousness of Mal's statement, "Help Zoe and Jim back to the ship. Jayne, we're going to need some sort of stretcher for the Captain."

River pulled the blanket off her husband and laid it out beside him. "Can use this," she said, willing a calm resolve into her voice. "Just need one other person to carry a corner."

"I can get to the ship without help," Jim said, taking his arm from around Inara's shoulder.

"Good," Simon said, gently maneuvering Mal's body onto the blanket with River's help. "Get to the infirmary. We'll be along in a minute."

As Zoe, Jim, and Kaylee left for the ship, Mal said, "Think you'd best see to Zoe once we're home. Lost a lot of blood."

"Are you telling me how to do my job?" Simon said lightly, though he was observing Mal's total lack of response to touch below his beltline.

"Just sayin'," Mal said, not liking the look of Simon's unconscious frown one bit.

Motioning Jayne to the top corner of the blanket and Inara and River to the bottom corners, Simon took a corner into his own hands. "All right, we're going to pick you up on the count of three. Everyone try not to jostle the Captain too badly. Ready?"

XXXXXXXXXX

"You get the meds for Daniel?" Mal asked, watching from the main infirmary bed as Simon examined Zoe's puncture wound.

"Yes," Simon answered distractedly. "He's doing well for now."

"Good to know," Mal said. Turning to River, he said in a low tone, "Need to get into the air and get to a refueling station quick as we can. Coin from the job's in my coat pocket."

River nodded, but didn't move from his side. "Darlin'," he said, reaching up to cup her cheek. "I'll be right here when you get us in the air. Don't wanna be stayin' here long enough for another storm to hit. 'Sides which, little Daniel needs to get to Osiris in a hurry, and this has delayed us too long already."

"Want to hear what Simon has to say," River whispered, looking at her husband with liquid brown eyes.

"He's still got Jim to tend to after Zoe. You got time," Mal said, a little more forcefully than he'd intended. As River flinched at the tone, he added apologetically, "Please, bao bei."

Squaring her shoulders, River went to do her job, and within minutes, Mal felt the ship lift easily into the atmosphere. Relaxing against the bed, he released the breath he'd been unconsciously holding.

"That should do it," Simon said, drawing Mal's attention back to Zoe. "I'm not sure at this point I'd even bother with a transfusion. You'll be weak for a few days, but iron supplements should bring up your hemoglobin soon. I'd say you were quite fortunate, considering the condition of the shuttle."

"Thanks, doc," Zoe said, sliding off the bed carefully.

"That doesn't mean you're fit for duty," Simon said as she swayed slightly. "Bed rest for a few days at least, I think."

"Got no problem with that," Zoe replied as the room slowly stopped spinning. "I think I'll go get started on that right now." Glancing over at Mal, she said, "Less I'm needed here."

Mal shook his head. "River'll be back in time to do any hand-holdin' needed," he said, a thin smile gracing his face. "You go on and get some rest. I expect to be havin' need of you a little later on."

"Aye, aye, sir," she said, her voice betraying no emotion. "I'll be back to check on you later."

Simon washed his hands thoroughly and turned to Mal. "See to Jim first," Mal said, strangely reluctant to hear any results from Simon as to his own condition just yet. Simon nodded, as Jim took Zoe's place on the second exam table, pulling open his shirt to show Simon the bruising along his ribcage.

"Is this the only place you're hurt?" Simon asked, running his hands as gently as he could along Jim's battered torso.

"Just here and my head," Jim acknowledged, drawing in a sharp breath as Simon hit an especially sore spot.

"Sorry," Simon said, continuing gingerly. After a few more minutes of probing, he took his portable scanner and x-rayed the area to confirm his physical exam. "Yep," he said. "You've got five broken ribs. Are you having any trouble breathing?"

"Only if I try to breathe deep," Jim answered. Simon nodded, gently binding the man's ribcage. Turning his attention to the laceration on the man's forehead, Simon said, "This is going to require some stitching, I'm afraid."

"Just be sure to make my face pretty, doc," Jim said, as Simon cleaned the wound and applied a numbing agent to the area.

Mal snorted, watching Simon work. "Doc's good, but he's not a miracle worker."

"I beg your pardon," Simon said, pretending to take umbrage at the remark. "I've worked several miracles since I've been on Serenity, not the least of which was eating an entire bowl of Zoe's stew."

"Now, doc, that was just plain uncharitable," Jim said, chuckling. "Especially since the lady in question isn't here to defend herself."

"Trust me, if she were, I'd never say it," Simon said, tying off the last knot. Giving Jim an antibiotic and two pain pills, Simon patted him on the shoulder. "You're done, unless there's something else I should know about."

"Nope," Jim said, easing down from the table. "Thanks, doc."

"Any time," Simon said, turning his attention back to Mal as Jim walked out of the infirmary. "Okay, Captain," he said. "I've run out of other patients. Let's see what's going on, shall we?"

Mal looked at him bleakly. "Best call River back in first. I have a feelin' I don't want to hear this but once."

"No need to call, ai ren," River said from the doorway. "I was just waiting outside until Simon finished with Jim. " Crossing the distance to come to his side, she leaned down to kiss his cheek and entwine her fingers with his. "I'm here."

Feeling her steadying presence in his mind as well, Mal sighed and turned to Simon. "Guess I'm ready then, doc."

Simon gazed at him compassionately, easing the shirt off Mal's shoulders. Wincing at the sight of the yoke-shaped bruising across his chest, Simon said, "No doubt about what caused this."

Mal gasped as he probed the tender skin. "Whole console came loose when we crashed," he said through clenched teeth. "Landed in my lap. Yoke probably would have crushed me good and proper but for the chair back giving way."

"The chair broke?" Simon asked in amazement.

"Yeah," Mal answered. "Musta' flipped me backward pretty hard, but I don't remember it, bein' as I blacked out."

"Probably just as well," Simon murmured soberly. "There don't seem to be any broken bones in this area, just heavy bruising. I'll confirm it with a scan in a few minutes, after I've examined…everything else."

Moving down Mal's body, Simon took off the makeshift splints and examined Mal's legs. "Jim and Zoe did a fair job of settin' the bones, best as I could tell," Mal said quietly.

"Looks like it," Simon agreed. "I'll confirm that with the scan as well, and make any necessary adjustments before applying the casts." Looking up at his patient sympathetically, Simon said, "You said you can't feel anything below your abdomen?"

"That's right," Mal acknowledged, holding his voice as steady as possible.

"All right," Simon said. "Close your eyes for me."

Mal complied, dread pooling in his stomach. River squeezed his hand, reminding him that he was not alone.

"I want you to tell me when you feel something," Simon said, pricking Mal's leg with a small needle.

"'Kay."

Simon slowly worked his way up both sides of Mal's body, pausing briefly between each needle prick, hoping for a response. Finally, when he pricked the area just below Mal's navel, Mal flinched. "Felt that," he said, opening his eyes. Noting Simon's grim expression, he added in an almost whisper, "Back's broke, ain't it, doc?"

"I'm not sure," Simon said. "Maybe not. Let's just do the scan before we jump to any conclusions."

A heavy silence fell over the infirmary as Simon scanned Mal's body thoroughly, and in the corridor outside, the crew waited just as quietly to hear the prognosis. Simon felt the combined weight of all eyes focused on him as he put the scanner down. Taking a deep breath, he said, "First, let me say that there were no broken bones in your chest area. Also the legs look good. I won't have to make any adjustments before I apply the casts." He paused, looking into Mal's anxious blue eyes. "But there is considerable damage to your eighth and ninth vertebrae. The tissue of your spinal cord has been affected rather severely."

"Which means?" Mal ground out past the knot in his throat.

"Essentially, it means that you are paralyzed," Simon answered softly.

"Permanently?" Mal's voice was ragged with the weight of the question.

"Quite possibly," Simon said. Seeing the devastation on the Captain's face, he added quickly, "Give me a little time to research it. There are therapies we can try that may have some effect, new things that are having a degree of success…" His words trailed off pitifully into silence.

Mal closed his eyes for a long moment, marshalling his considerable will. Grasping River's hand unintentionally tightly enough to bruise, he opened his eyes to look directly at Simon. "I'd appreciate whatever you could find," he said. "You're the best doctor I know and if there's a way, I got confidence you'll find it."

"I'll do everything I can," Simon said solemnly.

Mal cleared his throat. "Think maybehaps River and me could have a moment alone 'fore you put on the casts?"

"Of course," Simon said. As he left the room, he glanced back to see the couple clinging to each other for dear life as they gave rein to their mutual grief.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	7. Chapter 7

**Crash Course**

**Part VII—Fight or Flight**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: I'm just playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Mal struggles to adjust to his new situation.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Adam sat on Mal's lap, tapping at the hard plaster casts Simon had made. Mal tried hard to control the urge to yell at him to stop. "Mama says you told everybody where to find the shuttle," he said, attempting to distract the child from his fascination with Mal's legs.

Adam looked up at him mid-tap. "Mmmm hmmm," he said. "You were hurt."

"How did you know I was hurt?" Mal asked curiously, still trying to understand the ability Adam shared with his mother.

Adam shrugged his shoulders. "Dunno," he said. "Just felt it."

"Did it hurt you too?" Mal questioned, almost afraid of the answer.

Adam looked up into his father's worried eyes. "Always hurts when you hurt."

Mal hugged his son as tightly as his bruised chest would allow. "I'm sorry, son," he said. "Would never do anything to hurt you on purpose."

"I know," Adam said wriggling free from his father's tight grip. Looking directly at Mal again, he announced, "You still hurt."

Mal stared at him, startled by the assertion. "No, I don't hurt now. Dr. Simon stopped the hurting."

Adam put his hand to Mal's chest. "Hurt in here," he said with certainty born of something beyond empathy.

Mal could not gaze into those blue eyes so like his own and lie to the child. "Maybehaps some," he admitted. "But that kinda' hurt only gets better with time."

Adam buried his face in Mal's neck, wrapping his arms tightly around him. "Love you, Daddy," he whispered.

"Love you too, little one," Mal replied softly.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Ching jin," Zoe called out, pulling a robe around her shoulders and sitting up very carefully.

Jim poked his head down into the bunk. "Mind if we come in?" he asked. "Anya's been a bit anxious to see you this morning." 

Zoe smiled as Anya's head appeared at Jim's side. "I waited a really long time to wake you, Mama," she said earnestly.

"And I appreciate it," Zoe said, holding her arms out to the child. Anya clamored down the ladder and into her bed quickly. "Missed you when you were gone, Mama," she said, breathing in the scent that was all Zoe.

"Missed you too," Zoe said, blinking back embarrassing tears. She looked up to see Jim ease carefully into a chair by the wall. "You all right?" she asked mildly.

"Relatively speaking," he replied with a smile. "Been worse. You?"

"The same," she answered, stroking Anya's golden hair lovingly. "So, what happened on Serenity while we were gone, little one?"

Anya nestled more comfortably against Zoe's uninjured side and told the tale of Simon's visit to the Skyplex. "So, he brought back the meds and the money, too," she finished with a flourish. "And Daniel's been much better ever since."

"Well now," Zoe said. "That's quite a story."

"You should hear Jayne's version sometime," Jim said, smiling. "It's even more…interesting."

"I can imagine," Zoe said, the barest hint of a smile playing across her lips.

Anya continued. "And then we came to get you. Adam knew just where to look, and Miss Kaylee made the ship go really fast, and then we saw the snow." Pausing, she looked up at Zoe curiously. "Was it very cold on St. Albans, Mama?"

"Very cold," Zoe confirmed. "But your Uncle Jim got the heat going in the shuttle, and then it was tolerable."

Anya looked at her uncle and her mama closely. "Uncle Jim said you helped him with Captain Mal's legs." When Zoe nodded, she continued. "You think Captain Mal will be able to walk again?" she asked in a subdued voice.

Zoe glanced at Jim, whose face was studiously blank. Coughing, she answered, "The Captain does a lot of things other folks don't expect, so I conjure we'll just have to wait and see."

"And maybe pray," Anya suggested.

"Wouldn't hurt," Zoe agreed.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jayne peered into the doorway of the bridge, silently watching River check the course setting yet again. He cleared his throat uncomfortably, knowing he'd never been able to catch her unawares before. Figuring she had a right to be distracted with the news about Mal and all, he waited for her to turn around.

"Listen," he said when she finally did. "Thought I might have a word with you."

She looked at him quizzically, too numb to expend the effort to read him. "What is it, Jayne?"

He shifted nervously from one foot to the other. "Seems to me Serenity ain't exactly equipped for a cripple."

River winced at his word choice, but kept listening.

"You know, on accounta' the stairs and ladders and such," Jayne said. 'So I was thinkin' mebbe I could rig up some ramps or lifts, or some such. I know Mal ain't ready to be out of the infirmary yet, but when he is, I could have 'em mostly done, I reckon. You want I should work on it? Got most of what I need on the boat already."

River looked at him with a grateful smile. "I think that would be most helpful, Jayne Cobb. Thank you," she said softly.

Jayne returned her smile, pleased his suggestion had been accepted. "Figured it was the least I could do," he said gruffly, turning on his heel to get the tools to begin.

XXXXXXXXXX

Laying Daniel down carefully in the crib so as not to awaken him, Kaylee whispered, "When you comin' to bed, honey?"

"In a few minutes," Simon answered wearily. "I was just doing some research on the Cortex."

Kaylee laid her hands on his tense shoulders. "Cap'n don't expect you to be at it all day and night, Simon."

"I was looking at some information about the surgery for Daniel," he said tiredly. "I haven't done the procedure since Medacad, and even then only once."

Kaylee swallowed nervously. "You sure you want to try it on Daniel?"

Simon looked up at her, smiling reassuringly. "It won't be a problem once I have the proper equipment," he said. "I was just brushing up on the procedure. That's all."

Kaylee kissed him tenderly, her lips tasting of the apples they'd eaten for dessert. "Then come to bed," she said softly.

Simon turned off the cortex screen, and began to undress. "I did find something that could possibly help Mal today, but I don't know what he'll think about it."

"I'm sure he'd do most anything to be able to walk again," Kaylee said sadly.

"Perhaps," Simon said noncommittally. "We'll just have to wait and see."

Kaylee looked at her husband oddly, but knew better than to expect him to be more forthcoming about a patient. Snuggling close to him as he got into bed, she supposed she would know what he meant soon enough. Serenity was, after all, not that big a boat.

XXXXXXXXXX

"What's all the bangin'?" Mal asked, dutifully eating the breakfast River had brought for him, though in truth he had little appetite.

"Jayne's doing some renovations," River answered.

Mal scowled. "What kind of renovations?"

River looked at her husband uncertainly. "He wanted to be of use to you. To do something helpful." She paused, causing Mal's frown to deepen. "So, he's installing some ramps and lifts so that you can get around Serenity when Simon releases you from the infirmary."

"Oh," Mal said, torn between being oddly touched by Jayne's thoughtfulness and totally irate at the entire situation.

"He only wanted to help," River said.

"I get that," Mal said wearily. Giving up any pretense of eating, he threw his fork down. "But none of it means a damn thing, River."

Watching his tortured yes, River saw all the fear and pain behind his words. "If there ain't some way outta this," he said, his voice betraying him, "I can't captain Serenity. Can't get jobs, crew don't eat and boat don't get fuel. If I can't do the job, can't be expectin' folk to fly with me." Once the torrent of words began, he couldn't seem to stop them. "Been lyin' here thinkin' on it for awhile. Don't see as I'd be much use dirtside either. Can't exactly be a rancher with no way to do the work." He looked away from River's compassionate gaze. "Can't even be a proper husband to you, bao bei," he said, the words bitter on his tongue.

"Mal," River began, but he held up his hand to forestall whatever she had intended to say. "You're a young woman, River," he said hollowly. "And you got needs to be met. Don't matter what you say to the contrary, that's the simple truth of it. If I can't do right by you, I got no right to expect you to stand by me. And if I can't provide for you and the little ones, I gotta think on havin' strength enough to let you find someone who can."

River looked at the hard line of his jaw, and something inside her snapped. "You think so little of our life together?" she said, her words thrown like pebbles against a pane of glass. "So little of the love we have?"

"It ain't like that at all," Mal said, anger flashing in his eyes. "You got the least idea how much it costs me to say this?"

"No more than it costs me to hear it," she said, not backing down an inch in this fight she knew she had to win for both of them. "You made a vow to me, Malcolm Reynolds, and if you think something like this releases you from honoring that vow,…well, then, you're not the man I thought you were." She lifted her chin defiantly.

Mal stared at his wife, her eyes flashing with an ire that had rarely been directed at him and her cheeks flushed with the intensity of her emotion.

"You're gorram beautiful when you're angry," he muttered, unable to stop the words from coming out.

"Don't change the subject," River snapped.

Having a sudden burst of clarity despite his frustration and anger at being injured so seriously, he said, "I can't believe you'd fight with a half of a man."

"I wouldn't," River answered, her eyes boring into the very soul of him. "I'm fighting with my husband, a very whole man."

Mal felt unwelcome tears well in his eyes, and he blinked them quickly away. "That the way you see it?"

"It is," she answered, standing her ground and defying him to contradict her.

Wishing for a brief moment that he had her reading ability, he stared at her intently. She stared back, allowing the steel in her resolve to show.

Simon walked into the infirmary. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt anything," he said, stammering a bit as he saw them locked in their adversarial positions.

Mal broke eye contact first, looking over at Simon with something akin to relief. "It's all right," he said, his voice strained. "River was just telling me about a course adjustment." He held out his hand to River, and she immediately took it. 'Sorry, bao bei', he thought as clearly as possible. He was rewarded with a smile that warmed his heart through. 'Just don't let it happen again' came the saucy reply, as clear in his head as if she had spoken the words aloud. He gave her a quick smile and turned his attention to Simon.

"So, what's the news, doc?"

"Well," Simon said, crossing his arms and leaning against the counter. "There are some possibilities I'd like to discuss with you regarding treatment options."

"I'm all ears," Mal said. "What's the plan?"

Simon sighed. "Well, I wish I could say that it was simple, but it's not."

Mal observed the doctor closely, his reluctance to elaborate giving Mal new reason to worry.

"I'd take it as a kindness if you'd just explain it to me. How 'bout you start from the beginning, and I'll try to keep up." 

Simon nodded. "All right," he said. "But just remember that these are just options from which to choose, and the decision will be yours alone. And well, of course, River's as well." And pulling up a stool to the bedside, he began to explain.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	8. Chapter 8

**Crash Course**

**Part VIII—Options**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Mal, River, and Simon discuss possible treatment options.

XXXXXXXXXX

"The real problem with spinal cord injury," Simon explained, "is that your body is incapable of regenerating the damaged tissue naturally. While the vertebrae will heal in time, the spinal cord itself cannot heal in the same way. So realistically, the only real chance for significant recovery is in introducing a catalyst of sorts to the site of the damage in the hope that it will stimulate new tissue growth in the area affected."

"And is there a catalyst that we could try?" Mal asked, following Simon's explanation so far.

Simon cleared his throat. "Well, that's where the situation becomes a little more complicated. The cells in our bodies are specialized. Skin cells are skin cells, brain cells are brain cells, blood cells are blood cells, and so forth. But before the cells acquire their special signatures, they are simply stem cells. Everyone has stem cells in their body, and these cells can be harvested and engineered to become whatever is needed. So, genetically altered stem cells can accomplish a specific purpose, such as the regeneration of spinal tissue. There has been research done on and off in this field for the past five hundred years, though there have been major objections to its applications for most of that time. So, major advances have been slow in coming, and have really only begun to appear in the last decade or so."

"Okay," Mal said slowly. "So, what's the problem? If these stem cells work, we just need to get them somehow and use 'em, right?"

"Theoretically, yes," Simon said. 'But the question really is, where do we get them?"

River sat down suddenly on the edge of Mal's bed, unconsciously stroking the slight swell of her abdomen.

Mal frowned. "Didn't you just say everybody's got 'em? Why can't we just use the ones I've got already and …I don't know…put 'em where they're needed?"

"It's not that simple," Simon said. "For one thing, I don't have the equipment nor the expertise to manipulate the cells if we could harvest them from you. But the bigger dilemma is this. Spinal cord tissue is highly specialized. Adult stem cells have nothing more than a minute chance of being at all useful for the type of regeneration your injury would require."

"Then why are we even talkin' about it?" Mal asked, feeling all manner of dense.

"Because of the fetus," River said softly, looking at Simon for confirmation.

Simon nodded. "The younger the donor cells, the better the odds for viability."

Mal looked at the two siblings with something very close to horror. "You mean to say that you would consider takin' these stem cells from the baby?'' he asked. "Is that what you're suggesting?"

"I'm not suggesting anything," Simon hastened to point out. "But your best chance of recovery rests with this option. The fetus has DNA compatible with your own, and the stem cells would be of the most useful kind. But…" Simon paused, unable to meet Mal's piercing stare. "There would be a significant risk to the fetus."

"How significant?" River asked hollowly.

Dreading the agony of the choice his sister and her husband were about to face, Simon looked at her compassionately. "The chances are a little better than seventy percent that the fetus would spontaneously abort if the cells were harvested."

River swayed as if sucker punched. Mal reached out to steady her, though his own hands were trembling. "Then it ain't an option," he said raggedly. "Won't be killin' a child just so's I can walk again."

His statement hung in the air for a long moment as River weighed all the possible outcomes in her mind with lightning speed. Finally, she spoke. "There's a chance it might not kill the baby," she said miserably. "How can we live with the thought that you're permanently disabled if there is the slightest chance that…"

"River," Mal said firmly. "Listen to me. We've already lost one child, and I'm fair certain I don't have it in me to lose another, even to make it possible for me to walk again. Dong ma?"

"But we could have another child, if the treatment was successful," she offered, hating the words even as they came out of her mouth.

"Maybehaps so, but that ain't a certainty, is it doc?' Mal asked, glancing up at Simon for confirmation.

"No," Simon admitted quietly.

"And even if it were certain," Mal said. "Another baby wouldn't replace this one, anymore than Adam replaced Sam."

River began to cry, her shoulders shaking with great heaving sobs. Mal pulled her closer to him, kissing the top of her head. "Hush, darlin'," he said, his voice cracking under the strain. "We'll just have to find another way."

Simon wiped the tears from his own cheeks, gathering his professional demeanor around him like a coat of mail. "If you are unwilling to make use of the fetal stem cells, there is another option. It doesn't hold as high a chance of success as using the cells of the fetus, but it also doesn't carry the same chance of harming the donor permanently."

Two sets of red-rimmed eyes fixed hopefully on his face. "It's possible Adam could be the donor," Simon said quietly. "He's still young enough that he has more viable stem cells than an adult, and he, of course, shares your DNA just like the baby." Met with utter silence, he continued. "The procedure would not kill him, but it would be…traumatic."

Mal flinched, his brief hope crushed again with Simon's words. "I sat here yesterday and told that boy I would never hurt him intentionally," he said, his heart aching with the memory of it.

"Mal," Simon said, seeing the desperation in his eyes. "Please don't reject this out of hand. This is essentially your last option. There is nothing else with nearly as good a chance of restoring real mobility to you. Rejecting this is consigning yourself to a life without the use of your lower half."

"Not rejecting it means exposing Adam to trauma. What kind of man would do that to his son?" Mal whispered.

Exhausted from the emotional strain, River answered, "He's already being exposed to emotional trauma," she said sadly. "He feels what you feel, ai ren. And not just when you're physically hurt. He knows what this is doing to you, no matter how I try to shield him from the worst of it. He's bound to you, your own flesh and blood. We should at least consider the possibility that not letting him help you in this way might do more harm to him later than the physical trauma of being a donor would do to him now."

"How can I ask that kind of sacrifice from a two year old child?" Mal asked, swallowing thickly. "And how can you even consider allowing it?"

A tear rolled down River's cheek. "I can consider it because he's not an average two year old, Mal. He senses things, things that are shaping him every day into who he is going to be. And physical trauma does not translate into permanent damage, whereas finding out that he could have potentially saved his father from permanent paralysis will almost certainly be more emotional damage than a child should carry. And make no mistake. He will know. I won't be able to hide it from him, and neither will you."

"What exactly would be involved for him if he were to be the donor?" Mal asked Simon, a large part of him recoiling at the very question.

"There would be a small surgical procedure," Simon said. "An incision would be made in his lower back, and some of the cells there would be harvested. The first few days would be the most difficult, because he would have to be completely immobilized. Considering his general good health, I believe recovery time would be three weeks, at the outside. Then, barring complications, he would be perfectly fine."

"What kind of complications?" Mal asked.

"The general complications that come with any surgery. There is always a slight risk in using anesthesia, and a risk of infection at the surgical site. And in this case, there would be the added risk that comes with immobilizing him for the first few days."

Feeling Mal's strong resistance to the idea like a physical wave, River asked, "And Mal's chances of recovery?"

Simon took a deep breath. "About a sixty to seventy percent chance of regaining sensation in his lower extremities, and perhaps a little better than fifty percent chance of achieving complete mobility again."

"You've beaten tougher odds," River said, looking pleadingly at Mal.

"But I didn't have to put my son in harm's way to do it," he replied, the conflicting emotions roiling through his head enough to make him nauseous. Turning to Simon, he said, "You said yourself you don't have the expertise nor equipment to do it even if I should agree."

"No, I don't," Simon acknowledged. "But we're heading to Osiris, where there is an excellently equipped neurosurgery department. One of the best in the Core. I could make some discreet inquiries as to availability and cost, if you wish."

Sensing her husband's turmoil, River said, "At least consider it, Mal. Let Simon check into it, and we can discuss it some more. The decision doesn't have to be made today. We're still two weeks from Osiris, even at full burn. Please, Mal."

Mal exhaled heavily. "Find out what you can, Simon, and we'll talk about it some more. That's all I can say for now."

Outside in the corridor, Jim moved quietly away from the infirmary, thinking carefully about what he had just overheard.

XXXXXXXXXXX

While almost everyone else on Serenity slept, Simon sat in the galley, staring blankly at the wall. Jim pulled up a chair beside him, startling him out of his sleep-deprived stupor. "Mind if I talk with you a minute, doc?" he asked, easing into the chair somewhat stiffly.

"Of course not," Simon said, assessing the man by long habit. "Are your ribs bothering you more?"

"What?" Jim asked. "Oh, no, my ribs are about the same. No worse, no better. That's not what I wanted to talk to you about." Simon looked at him quizzically. Jim continued. "You find out anything about the cost of the treatment for the Captain yet?"

Simon blinked slowly. "How did you know about…"

"I was on my way to visit with him. Overheard the whole thing." At Simon's shocked expression, he said, "I know, I know. It wasn't right to eavesdrop and I'll be asking forgiveness next time I get around to praying. Now, what did you find out?"

Simon sighed. "I've found out that I should have checked on the cost before I even mentioned the possibility of this treatment."

"That bad, huh?"

"Worse," Simon acknowledged. "Even if Mal was willing to use Adam as a donor, the cost alone is more than all of us combined could accumulate if we sold everything we owned, including Serenity itself."

"And I'm taking it they wouldn't accept partial payments?"

"From a man whose permanent address is a transport vessel that frequents the Rim worlds? I don't think so," Simon said dryly.

"You told the Captain this yet?"

"No."

"Well then, don't," Jim said. "There might be something I can do to iron out this wrinkle. Give me a day, okay?"

Simon looked at him dubiously, but agreed.

"Thanks, doc. I'll get back to you soon as I can. I'm going to bed now. Looks like you could stand to do the same." With that, Jim walked out of the galley, leaving Simon to stare after him.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal lay awake in the stillness of the infirmary, his thoughts too conflicted to allow sleep. He and River had talked long into Serenity's sleep cycle, weighing their decision from every conceivable angle, until finally exhaustion had forced River to retire for the night.

Mal looked down at his useless legs. Running his hands down his chest and abdomen, he reached further down to the area below his navel. Pinching the skin there viciously, he closed his eyes praying for even the barest inkling of a sensation. Feeling none, he leaned back against the pillow, throwing his arm across his eyes. Images of Adam immobilized in some Alliance hospital room, frightened and hurt, repeated in his head, and he shuddered at the thought of it. What if he put his child through that for nothing? he thought morosely. Simon had said there was no better than a fifty percent chance of being mobile again. How could he justify subjecting Adam to anything that traumatic for such odds? And yet how could he pass up the possibility of being whole again, being able to provide for his family, being a man who could be a capable husband to River and father to Adam and the little one on the way? And what about being on Osiris in such a helpless state? He was not wildly optimistic that things would go smoothly there, even if he could somehow afford the treatment. Normally such inner battles would dictate a walk around Serenity to clear his head. Thinking bitterly that was no longer an option, Mal tried to go to sleep.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	9. Chapter 9

**Crash Course**

**Part IX—Fathers and Sons**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Mal and Simon have a talk, and River and Adam come to the infirmary for breakfast.

XXXXXXXXXX

Simon closed the blinds in the infirmary and slid the door shut. "Now," he said as cheerfully as he could. "Let's see about cleaning you up, shall we?"

Mal grimaced, mightily embarrassed to be unable to see to his own personal needs and strangely glad that it was Simon and not River who would be stripping the soiled sheets from under him and giving him a bath of sorts. At least Simon worked with a certain professional detachment that made the situation almost tolerable, whereas River was altogether too compassionate.

Simon dropped the linens in a neat pile at the foot of the bed and filled a pan with warm water and a gentle cleanser. "River should be along with breakfast before too long," he said, gently easing Mal's torso forward to scrub his back. "I want you to try to eat more today."

Mal sighed, thinking how good the warm water felt against his aching back. "Can't say I'm all that hungry," he admitted. "Not expendin' a lot of energy layin' here in bed."

"True enough," Simon said, handing Mal the soapy cloth to wash his chest and arms. "But still, you need to keep up your strength. As soon as the heavy bruising heals a bit, we need to start some sort of physical therapy, even if it's only temporary." He took the cloth back from Mal. "Now lie back and try to turn on your side, so I can reach everything else."

As Simon worked, Mal thought uncomfortably about what he must be doing, filling in the sensory gap with an unfortunately vivid imagination. After what seemed an eternity, Simon rolled him back over and started work on his front. Mal closed his eyes, a flush spreading from his chest to his cheeks, despite the fact that he felt nothing.

"This wasn't here yesterday," Simon said, eyeing the spot below Mal's navel suspiciously. Mal opened his eyes and propped himself up on his elbows, seeing the livid bruise Simon had observed. "Mind telling me how this happened?" Simon asked.

Mal cleared his throat. "I mighta' done that last night. Just, you know, doin' a little experiment."

Simon looked at him sternly. "Well, don't do that again. Your body will have a hard enough time healing without you adding to the problem. What would possess you to hurt yourself like that?"

"Didn't hurt," Mal answered mulishly. "That's kinda' the point."

"Whether you feel it of not, injuries will still occur," Simon said tiredly. "You're going to have to learn to be very careful." Finishing up with the bath, he asked, "Would you like a razor now?"

"Yeah," Mal said. "Bound to help."

Simon smiled, and handed him the shaving equipment. Perching on the edge of the bed, he held the mirror as Mal dispensed with his stubble. "So, did you get any sleep at all after River left last night?"

"Not much," Mal replied between razor swipes. "You?"

"Not much," Simon admitted. The rest of Mal's beard disappeared before they spoke again.

"Did you come to any decision?" Simon asked as neutrally as possible.

"Yes, I did," Mal said, handing the razor, bowl, and towel back to Simon. "Haven't told River yet, but I reckon I will soon's she gets here this morning. Don't think she's gonna like it though."

"Oh?" Simon asked, faint disapproval in his tone.

Mal met Simon's eyes directly. "You're a father now, Simon. Can you look me in the eye and tell me you'd put Daniel through it if it was you lying in this bed instead of me?"

Simon sighed. "I don't know, Mal. The truth is I have no idea what I'd do confronted with the prospect of living my life tied to a wheelchair or bed." He paused, thinking how best to make his point. "The decision is, of course, yours to make. But consider this. Suppose it was River lying here instead, and Adam could give her a fighting chance of recovering in exchange for a few weeks or pain and discomfort. Then what would you do? What would you want Adam to do?"

"It ain't the same," Mal said stubbornly.

"And why not?" Simon persisted.

"Because I'm the gorram father. That's why," Mal shouted, abruptly losing the last of his composure. "And fathers ain't supposed to cause their sons pain. They're supposed to be strong and do the looking after, not the other way 'round." Shocked by his own words, he looked down at his clenched fists and gulped convulsively.

Simon stared at him, aware that somehow the next few words spoken would be very important. "Mal?" he prompted.

Mal looked up, his eyes the color of a stormy sea. "I ever tell you about my father, Simon?" he said, his voice oddly flat.

Simon shook his head, not daring to speak in the fragility of the moment.

"Rancher by trade, he was," Mal said. "Ran one of the largest ranches on Shadow. Big bear of a man, tough as nails, but with a real gentle touch to 'im." Mal paused, a faint smile ghosting across his face at some half-forgotten memory. But as quickly as it appeared, it was gone, replaced by an infinite sadness. "Anyway, one day he was roundin' up a few strays as had got away from the herd. There was a ravine at the edge of our land, and he headed up that way. Seems strays always went that way for some reason. He was ridin' along the ridge, gettin' close enough to look down, I reckon, and his horse lost her footing. Tumbled down least a hundred feet, rolling end over end with the horse 'til they got to the bottom. Laid there for awhile, 'til some of the hands figured what had happened. They shot the horse. Too broke up to save. But they brought Daddy back to the house. Lived near a week, laying in his bed broke all to hell. Doctor came and told Mama it'd been a kindness if the ranch hands had shot Daddy right along with his horse. That was the first time I ever heard my mama cuss, and two days later, when Daddy breathed his last, was the first time I ever saw her cry."

"How old were you?" Simon asked softly.

Mal looked up, brought back to the present by the question. "I was five," he said. "It was a long gorram week, sittin' by his bed watchin' and listenin' to him struggle. Woulda' done anything to stop him hurtin' if I coulda'."

"Would you have?" Simon asked.

"Anything," Mal confirmed bleakly. "He was my father."

Simon moved to put his hand on Mal's shoulder. "And you're Adam's father," he said gently. "Do you think he would do less for you?" When Mal refused to answer, he asked, "Can you really deny him the chance to at least try?"

As if conjured by the conversation, Adam bounded into the infirmary with River walking behind him carrying a breakfast tray, thus saving Mal the trouble of trying to answer.

Clearing his suddenly tight throat, Mal put on a smile. "Hey there, little fella," he said, holding out his arm to help Adam climb up on the bed.

Simon hastily gathered up the soiled linens from the end of the bed, and shot Mal a significant glance. "I'll be back to check in with you after breakfast. We'll talk more then."

XXXXXXXXXX

Heading to the laundry, Simon was cornered by Jim. "Captain come to any decision yet?' he asked, not bothering with the standard morning greetings.

"Still working it through," Simon answered.

Jim nodded. "I expect it would take quite a bit of pondering to come to a decision such as that. I just wanted to let you know that payment might not be a problem, if the Captain decides to go through with it in time for me to put a few things in motion."

"Really?" Simon asked blandly, though he was inwardly very intrigued. "You have a bank account we're not aware of?"

"At least one," Jim answered with a twinkle of amusement in his eye. "But I don't intend to access it. There's another option, if the Captain will agree. Think I'd rather discuss it with him first though, so I'd appreciate it if you'd let me know as soon as he comes to a decision."

"Of course," Simon said, practically eaten up with curiosity.

"Thanks, doc," Jim said, slapping him on the back. "See you at breakfast."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Split it with you," Mal offered, holding up the apple River had brought to tempt his appetite.

River shook her head. "I don't want it, and please don't offer it to Adam either. I know you're just not hungry, but Simon says you need to eat."

Mal smiled. "Am I that transparent?"

"I am a reader," River said, munching on a protein bar. Unlike her husband, she had a tremendous appetite, due in part to her pregnancy.

Mal cut the apple into slices, one eye watching Adam roam around the infirmary. Noting his troubled look, River said quietly, "You've decided, haven't you?"

Mal sighed, crunching into an apple slice. "Thought I had 'til your brother left me with a point or three to ponder."

River waited expectantly for some explanation, and resisted the impulse to just pluck the thoughts from his mind.

"I ain't in any way comfortable with using Adam as a donor," Mal said quietly. "But I can maybehaps see how I'm not the only one whose thoughts on the matter should be heard. Guess we oughta' talk to Adam and explain things so's he can understand what's goin' on. But," he paused, giving River a firm look, "We explain the bad as well as the good. Dong ma?"

"Of course," River agreed.

"Adam," Mal said, handing the breakfast tray over to River. "Climb on up here a minute., Me and Mama wanna talk with you 'bout somethin'."

Adam crawled up the table and swung into Mal's lap, looking up at his father interestedly. Glancing at River for support, Mal began. "You know when the shuttle crashed, I got hurt pretty bad."

Adam nodded. "Legs got broke."

"Yes," Mal said. "But something else was hurt too. My back is hurt in a way so that it can't get better without some help."

"You said Uncle Simon stopped the hurt," Adam said.

"Yes, he did," River said. "But Daddy needs a special kind of help to get really better."

"What kind?" Adam asked curiously, sensing the apprehension emanating from both his parents.

As simply as possible, River explained the procedure while Mal watched Adam's reaction carefully, looking for signs he understood the gist of things as well as any reluctance or fear on his part. After River finished, Adam looked up at his father with wide blue eyes. "So, the little thingies in me could make you better?"

"Maybehaps they could," Mal answered honestly. "Your Uncle Simon isn't exactly sure."

"And you won't get better without the thingies?"

"No, I won't," Mal said. "But I won't get worse either," he hastened to add, not wanting Adam to feel pressured.

Adam stared at his father for a long moment, and Mal had the uncomfortable feeling his son was reading him. But then Adam blinked and smiled. "I can help," he said.

"Only if you're sure that's what you want to do," Mal said seriously.

Adam's brow wrinkled. "When you leave home, you always tell me to help Mama and the others on accounta' they're family."

"That's right," Mal said.

Adam grinned. Well, you're my Daddy. Gotta help you too then, silly." Distilled down to the logic of a two-year-old, the argument made a certain kind of sense, Mal had to admit. "S'pose you're right," he said softly, his pride and love for his son washing over him in a great wave of gratitude.

"So when will Uncle Simon do it?" Adam asked, all business now.

"Uncle Simon won't be the one doing it," River said gently. "When we get to Osiris, he will stay here with Daniel to help him get better. There will be other doctors to take care of you and Daddy."

"Will it hurt a really lot?" Adam asked. "Like the time I fell on the stairs and hurt my elbow?"

"Maybe," River replied honestly. "But the doctors there will have medicine to make you feel better just like Uncle Simon did that time."

"And will you stay with me? You and Daddy?"

"Daddy will have to be in another part of the hospital with other doctors, but I'll be with you," River said reassuringly.

"And can Miss Inara come to see me?" he asked.

"I conjure she could be persuaded," Mal replied.

"Sometimes when I feel bad, ice cream makes it better," Adam said, beginning to grin.

"That a fact?" Mal said blandly. "Mama, do you suppose there might be some ice cream somewhere in that hospital on Osiris?"

River tilted her head as if seriously contemplating the answer. "I'm not sure," she said. "But perhaps if we ask politely enough…"

Adam giggled as River reached out to tickle him, setting into motion a round of horseplay that was still going strong when Simon returned to check on Mal. "What's all this?" he asked, taking in the heartwarming scene gladly.

Adam sat up, red-faced with laughter. Thinking that Uncle Simon had to be an expert on hospitals, he said, "Does the hospital in Osiris have lots of ice cream?"

"I imagine so," Simon said, looking at Mal questioningly.

"Sees Adam here thinks he's gonna have need of a fair bit of ice cream after the procedure is done," Mal said mildly, his eyes the only thing betraying the depth of his emotion.

Simon smiled, relief flooding through him that the decision had been made. "I see," he said, reaching out to cup Adam's cheek in his palm. "In that case, I'll make sure to call ahead so there will be plenty on hand."

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	10. Chapter 10

**Crash Course**

**Part X—Planning and Possibly Scheming**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playin' in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Jim reveals his payment plan, and the rest of the crew plan the heist of the equipment for Daniel's surgery.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Okay," Mal said, the vein in his temple beginning to throb. "Mind tellin' me why we went through all this with the choices and such if there's no ruttin' way I can afford to pay for the procedure anyway?" His voice, which had started out low and deadly, was now fairly reverberating in the small infirmary.

Simon flinched away from Mal's angry roar. "At first, I didn't know how prohibitive the cost would be," he said defensively. "And then, after I found out, Jim said that it could be worked out."

"Jim?" Mal asked, angrier by the minute. "What in the sphincter of hell does Jim have to do with it? How did he even know about it? Thought I could at least count on you to keep my business private."

Jim stepped into the infirmary, completely unruffled by Mal's tirade. "Simon didn't betray your confidence, Captain. I overheard the conversation accidentally."

"Long gorram conversation to be hearin' 'accidentally'," Mal growled, though his tone had lost some of its bite.

Jim had the good grace to blush. "Yeah, well…about that…I'm sorry," he said, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "But if you'll hear me out, I think I may have a solution to the problem. That is, if you have no objection to a little bit of fraud perpetrated against our illustrious government."

Mal's anger gave way to curiosity. "'Magine I wouldn't be objectin' to that too much," he allowed. "What you got in mind?"

Jim pulled up a stool to sit beside the bed. "Well, you see," he began. "As you know, I spent the better part of the war fighting for the Alliance."

Mal nodded impatiently. "And spent the last part of it in an Independent POW camp. I know," he said, trying to hasten the conversation along.

"Long story short," Jim said, "I've got medical benefits. A go-to-the-hospital-free kinda thing, so to speak."

Mal looked up at him suspiciously. "That don't seem like a normal kinda benefit the Alliance would be givin' a grunt."

Jim returned his gaze steadily. "You're absolutely right. Suffice it to say that I was a little more than a normal grunt."

"'Spect I'll be needin' to hear that story in full," Mal said with a new edge in his voice.

"I assumed as much," Jim said, somewhat reluctantly. Glancing at Simon, he then met Mal's eyes again. "I'd prefer to tell it another time, with your permission of course."

Mal nodded. Getting back to the original point, he said, "Plan won't work anyway. I assume before the Alliance would just foot the medical bills, there'd have to be proof it was you bein' treated. It'd be fair obvious I ain't you, even allowin' for the general stupidity of whatever hundan's in charge."

"I'm not suggesting that you impersonate me, Captain." Jim reached into his breast pocket and pulled out a small card. Handing it to Mal, he said, "Read it."

Mal's eyebrows rose as he read the card. "Says here spouse and children are covered too," he said, looking up at Jim's satisfied grin. "You plannin' on adoptin' me?"

"No," Jim answered, smiling widely now. "Thought I might marry you though."

Ignoring Simon's muted laughter, Mal said, "Come again?"

His wicked sense of humor fully engaged, Jim dropped down elegantly on one knee and grabbed Mal's hand, placing it over his own heart. "My dear Captain, would you do me the honor of being my blushing bride?"

Mal jerked his hand away, smiling despite himself. "Get up, you crazy hundan," he said, trying to look affronted. "Case you ain't noticed, I'm already married to a wild killer woman as could kill you with her brain."

"Not a problem," Jim answered, standing up and dusting off his trouser knees. Turning more serious, he said, "I've checked into it, Captain. All we have to do is present a valid certificate of marriage pre-dating the accident by at least two years, and you're covered."

"Well," Mal said, "Bein' as how I didn't marry you two years ago, and ain't gonna marry you now, how do you suggest we get a valid certificate?"

"I have an old friend on Paquin who works in Vital Records there. She has agreed to provide us with decent forgeries, given a little notice. They should pass inspection on Osiris."

"What if they check further? The procedure is very costly, and they might check more carefully than they usually would," Simon said, trying to anticipate any problems that might occur. "They could conceivably find the record of Mal's marriage to River."

"Shouldn't be a problem, even if they do. Polygamy is legal on Paquin, and there is no wording in the documentation to indicate a polygamous union wouldn't be recognized as binding for the purpose of using the government-sponsored insurance. Though, truth be told, I'd much rather River didn't come into the picture as Mal's wife," Jim said. "The way I figure it, if we could claim Adam as our son, and River as just the surrogate mother we used, his part of the procedure should be covered as well." Seeing the wheels turning in the Captain's head, he added, "As soon as the hospital is paid, and you're released, the records on Paquin magically disappear and you and Mrs. Reynolds go back to monogamy."

"And if those records should ever be audited?" Simon asked. "What then? I can't imagine the Alliance would not prosecute to the fullest extent of the law."

"And maybehaps a mite further than that," Mal added wryly.

"We produce divorce papers, say the missing paperwork on Paquin has nothing to do with us. I think we could make a convincing case for irreconcilable differences. What do you think, Captain?"

Mal looked at Jim for a long moment, drawn in by the man's hellbent smile. "Sounds like a plan," he said. "Two things though. Number one—you be the one to tell River and number two—I ain't wearin' white to the weddin'."

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'll send the documents straight to the claims department for you," the auburn-haired woman said, smiling warmly at Jim. Even filtered through the bad connection on the Cortex link, Jim couldn't help but think what a rare beauty Meg really was.

"I appreciate your help, sweetheart," he said genuinely.

"Glad to do it," Meg replied. "You know I'd do most anything in the 'verse for you." A small note of wistfulness crept into her voice. "I'm still rather partial to you, you know."

Jim cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I know you are, sweetheart. And I'm real sorry that…"

Meg held up her hand to forestall his thought. "No need to apologize, honey. Things change, and people change. Isn't a crime, just a fact. Water under the bridge and all that."

Jim smiled, marveling that even now, after their history together, she could maintain her grace and dignity so very well. "You're a singularly remarkable woman," he said, almost sadly.

Meg's green eyes went a little misty with his words. "Good to know you still remember that fact," she said. Turning back to the business at hand, she said, "The paperwork should be in order when you get to Osiris. Wave me if there's any problem."

"I will," Jim said. "And Meg, thanks again."

The woman nodded shortly, and cut the transmission.

XXXXXXXXX

"I still think I should be the one to go in," Simon said stubbornly, resistant to the idea of sending anyone else into the pediatric-neuro unit to retrieve the equipment he needed for Daniel's surgery.

"No," Zoe said flatly, scratching absent-mindedly at the bandage on her side. "It's too dangerous. You worked in this hospital, Simon. You don't think anybody would recognize you?"

"Well, River's going in," he said petulantly.

River sighed. "I only visited you there once, Simon, right before I went to the Academy. It's unlikely anyone would connect me with the fourteen-year-old girl who took the tour with you before your interview. And besides, I have to be there for Adam anyway."

"Be that as it may," Simon said, "I'm the only one who knows exactly what to look for, and knows the general lay-out of the peds unit."

"Which is why you're going to visualize it as close as you can, and then let your sister read you," Zoe said dryly. "We're already short enough on crew, without riskin' more folk than necessary on the inside."

Everyone around the galley table fell silent for a moment, thinking of their Captain lying in the infirmary. Zoe continued, "Like River said, she'll already be there, or at least close to there, with Adam."

Kaylee spread out the disks of the hospital schematics with one hand, while gently rocking Daniel with the other. "There's a side entrance here," she said, pointing to a spot on one of the disks. "If'n we could disable the fire alarm, it might be a good spot for River to let Zoe and Jayne in."

Zoe studied the layout shrewdly. "This equipment small enough we can walk it out?" she asked.

Simon nodded. "Should fit in one of Jayne's duffel bags."

Jayne frowned. "Then where will the extra guns go?"

"With a little luck, maybe we won't need 'em," Zoe said calmly. "At least, not more of 'em than we can just strap on." 

"Maybe I could get a few in with Mal's stuff," Jim suggested.

"Won't work," Simon said quickly. "Neither you nor River will be allowed to carry weapons through the front door of the hospital. There are several active weapons scanners at every admittance entrance."

"That include the side entrance Kaylee's talkin' about?" Jayne asked worriedly.

Simon looked again at the schematics. "No, I don't think so," he said slowly. "This just looks like a basic fire exit. There shouldn't be any weapons scans there, but there might be cameras."

"Camera's ain't too much trouble," Jayne said dismissively.

"All right, then," Zoe said, standing up. "Less there's any questions, best we get a good night's sleep. We'll be landing on Osiris come morning."

The crew dispersed to their separate living quarters, each of them anxious about how everything the next morning would go.

XXXXXXXXXX

Inara stood in the shadows of the corridor outside the infirmary, peering into the doorway. "May as well come on in and quit with the lurkin'," Mal said, startling the woman a little.

"I wasn't lurking," Inara said. "I just wasn't sure you were awake." She glided gracefully into the darkened room and sat on the stool by Mal's bed.

"Not like to get much sleep tonight, I'm thinkin'," Mal admitted mildly. "What with the doin's planned for tomorrow."

"I suppose not," Inara said, sighing. Looking around at the infirmary, she said, "This seems familiar. Do you have any idea how many times I've sat right here while you lay injured on that table?"

"Can't say as I kept count," Mal said. "Though I'd wager it's been a few too many."

Inara laid her small hand over his large one. "Mal, I…I just wanted to say before you go tomorrow that I hope…no, I know…that everything is going to work out. You're one of the strongest men I know and, with the possible exception of Jayne, also one of the most stubborn. If there's even the slightest chance of beating this, I know you will."

"It's a kindness for you to say so," Mal said softly. "Wish I thought you knew what you were talking about." The corners of his mouth tilted in that smile that Inara had always found so annoying.

"You just can't leave a tender moment alone, can you?" she asked, though there was amused affection in her tone.

"Not as a general rule," Mal said, his smile this time reaching his eyes.

Inara laughed, the tension broken. "How does River put up with you?"

Mal shook his head. "That's a right wonder to me. Guess she just has a strong constitution."

"Of that, I've no doubt," Inara agreed, squeezing his hand and standing to go.

"One thing, Inara, before you go," Mal said. "Adam's asked if you'd be visitin' him in the hospital. I'd be obliged to you if you would."

Inara smiled. "Of course, Mal. As Jayne reminded me, I'm the one who brings the ice cream to all the men I love when they're in the hospital."

"I ain't sure I even wanna hear the story behind that," Mal said.

"Don't worry," Inara said with a sweet smile. "I didn't intend to tell it anyway." With that, she walked quietly out of the infirmary, giving Mal something to ponder until River came in and curled herself comfortingly beside him on the narrow infirmary bed.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	11. Chapter 11

**Crash Course**

**Part XI—War Stories**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playin' in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Mal and Jim have a talk about the war.

XXXXXXXXXX

River landed Serenity on the crowded docks of Osiris with a satisfyingly light thump. Hastily flipping switches to power down the engine, she made her way quickly to the infirmary to spend the last few precious moments with Mal before the hospital transport arrived to take him away.

Sensing her need for a few minutes of private time with her husband, Simon stopped fidgeting with the equipment by Mal's bed and left them alone, mumbling something about checking on Daniel. Climbing up onto the bed, River smiled wickedly. "How are you feeling this morning, Mr. Bowden?"

Mal scowled. "Hey now, that ain't even funny," he protested.

River giggled. "Yes it is…at least, a little. Though I'll be glad when it's just you and me again. Don't really like the idea of sharing." She flicked her tongue lightly over her husband's scarred ear, and felt his heart rate automatically increase. Nibbling on the same earlobe, she delighted in his sharp intake of breath.

"What are you playin' at, darlin'?" Mal asked huskily, his heads reaching to cup her face gently. River pressed her lips softly against his, coaxing them open to drink in the taste of him. The kiss was long and deep, stirring the fire that burned in both souls until there was no oxygen left, and they broke away from each other breathless. River licked her lips, savoring the taste of Mal on her tongue. "Not playing. Just reminding you that you're coming home to me."

"Not likely to be forgettin' that fact," Mal said, his voice two registers lower than it had been before the kiss. He entwined his fingers with hers. "Wish you could stay with me."

River smiled softly, tapping his forehead. "Always with you in here," she said.

"I know," Mal said. "And I know you need to be with Adam. Little fella's gonna need his mama through all this. It's just…"

"Just what, ai ren?" she asked.

Mal swallowed audibly. "It's just that I really hope this works," he said. "If I thought that I'd never be able to …"

River put one slender finger to his lips. "You will, ai ren. You'll walk again, and stand strong and tall, dance with me again, make love to me again. You will."

Mal's grip on her hand was almost desperate. "You sayin' that because you know, or because it's what I need to hear?" he asked hoarsely.

Before River could answer, Zoe and Jim strode into the infirmary. "Transport's here, sir," Zoe said apologetically.

Slipping on the wedding ring he'd borrowed from Simon, Jim gave Mal and quick grin and wink. "Ready to go, honey?"

"I may not be able to kick you just now, but I'm fair certain I can still punch you into the middle of next week," Mal said pleasantly. Putting on a smile for the sake of the medical personnel rounding the corner into the infirmary, he dropped River's hand and took Jim's instead. "Let's just get this over with."

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal looked at Jim with something close to amazement. Finally alone for a moment after the ridiculously long process of admission to the neurosurgical suite, he could speak freely at last. "How the di yu did you know all that stuff for the forms? Almost had me convinced that we've been married for three years."

Jim shrugged. "Figured it might look suspicious if I didn't know some things about you like your birthday and your Mama's name and such. I've been admitted to a hospital or two in my time, and thought they might be asking those kinds of questions. So, I talked to River, and she filled me in on all the major points, anyway."

Mal nodded, impressed with the man's forethought. "Good job," he said. "And, in case I ain't said it before, thank you for all this."

"No need," Jim replied. "Ship needs her Captain, and I need a place to stay. Seemed like a good way to achieve both."

They sat in silence for a time, both men lost in their private thoughts. "S'pose River and Adam are gettin' settled in by now," Mal said after a long while. "Hope the little fella's not too scared."

"He'll be all right, I'd imagine," Jim said. "He seems a resilient kind of boy."

Mal smiled. "He does, at that." They fell silent again, and Mal shifted uncomfortably in the bed. "Guess I'm not accustomed to just sittin' and waitin' for somethin' to happen. Makes me a mite anxious."

Jim looked at him quizzically. "You fought in the war. There were bound to be times you just sat and waited. Serenity Valley, for instance."

"Not so much waiting as trying to stay alive, and keep everybody else alive I could," Mal said wryly. "Plenty to occupy the mind, if you get my meanin'."

Jim nodded. "How about in the internment camp? I spent all my time just waiting, and thinking. It was a long, tedious process."

Mal snorted. "That's the difference in bein' in the hands of Independents, I conjure. The fine Alliance facility was not so boring. Bein' beat bloody every day is all manner of interestin'," he said, bitterness seeping into his tone.

"Why would they do that?" Jim asked, honestly surprised. "What purpose did it serve? War was over."

"In my experience, the war is never over for some folk," Mal answered. "They didn't take too kindly to the actions of the Independents in Serenity Valley, and I happened to be the highest ranking officer left. Wanted to set an example, I s'pose. Teach the rest of the men left the error of our ways."

Jim nodded. "There were a few guards at the Independent camp with a penchant for revenge as well, though I can't honestly say they ever singled me out. I suppose there are vicious men on both sides of any war."

"Most like," Mal agreed. He paused for a moment, then said, "Speaking of the war and such, now seems like a fine time to hear that story about how you managed to get full medical benefits from the Alliance."

Jim sighed, rubbing the back of his neck distractedly. "I'm not sure telling the story would be conducive to your keeping me on your crew, Captain."

"I'm fair certain that not tellin' it will get you kicked off pretty quick too," Mal said easily.

Jim chuckled. "Good point," he admitted. "It's just that the things I saw, and some of the things I did….well, they seem almost unreal now, like a bad nightmare." Mal sat silent, waiting for him to continue. "I started out like everybody else does, I suppose," Jim said, leaning back in his chair for the long story. "You know, full of piss and vinegar. Off to fight the good fight. And, thanks to years of hunting in the land around our farm, I was a damn fine shot, so I came to the attention of the commanding officer pretty quick. Next thing I knew, I was in Special Ops training. Suited me well enough for a time. At first, the missions were interesting, exciting even. Extraction of key enemy combatants, rescue ops for some of our own key personnel, that sort of thing. Seemed almost noble, what we were doing. But as the war went on, the missions became….less noble. We started getting orders to suppress the rebellion in little border worlds all over the system by any means possible. And the means became more and more …" Jim paused, swallowing thickly. "More and more horrific. Got orders to take out whole settlements, men, women, and children who I knew had nothing to do with the fighting. Collateral damage, the Alliance called it. A necessary evil, they said, to end the war before it reached too far into the Core worlds. I was still a boy, hardly out of my teens, and the truth was a hard pill to swallow. But I toed the line. That was my job, and for awhile I just did it, getting more and more numb each time I saw a settlement destroyed." He fell silent, memories of that time replaying in his mind.

"So, what changed the tide?" Mal asked quietly, when Jim had not spoken for several minutes.

Jim looked up at him with haunted eyes. "Shadow," he said, his voice almost a whisper.

It was Mal's turn to swallow convulsively. "You have something to do with what happened on Shadow?"

Jim dropped his gaze, unable to look into the Captain's eyes. "Yes," he answered. "We were told it was a hotbed of rebellion, a place that was spawning some of the most committed soldiers to the Independent cause. Our orders were quite specific. Leave nothing alive. I was on the ship that destroyed the terraforming equipment and burned the atmosphere away."

"There were ten thousand people on that planet," Mal said raggedly. "Honest, hardworking people that just wanted to tend their land and be free."

"I know," Jim ground out. "I couldn't deal with it after that. Went dead inside, but didn't have it in me to actually end it. So, I did what I thought was the next best thing. I tried at every opportunity to get captured or killed, figuring to let some Independent soldier do what I couldn't and end me." He met the Captain's eyes again. "Only they didn't kill me. Just put me in a little cell and let me think on everything I'd done and everything I'd seen. I thought I might die of the shame of it for the longest time. But I didn't, and after the war was over, they let me walk free. And the irony of it is, that once I was released into Alliance bureaucracy, they treated me like a gorram hero. Gave me a medal of valor, like anything I had done could be considered even vaguely valorous. Gave me a pension, and medical benefits for life, because of my 'bravery, loyalty, and dignity'. Can you imagine that?"

"I can," Mal answered softly.

Jim continued as if he had not spoken. "Kept the medal and the card to remind me of what a stupid hundan I was to ever believe in the Alliance to begin with. Spent the first three years after the war drinking myself into a stupor. Finally got straightened out enough to make it back home to Paquin and try to patch things up with John, but he'd have none of it. And I didn't really blame him. No need for him to welcome me back into his life with what I'd become. Tried to pick up where I left off, even with the girl I had been with before the war. But I was hollowed out inside, nothing left to give to her. She tried for a time to fill the void, but I couldn't accept it, and finally I just left. Started taking jobs on the Rim, doing whatever needed doing for whoever needed it done."

"What happened to the girl?" Mal asked.

Jim smiled wryly. "Meg got a job in Vital Records on Paquin."

Mal's eyes widened. "She the one who arranged for the forged documents?"

"She is," Jim said. "She's a good woman."

"Then why aren't you there instead of here?"

"Because Anya's here," Jim answered without hesitation. "And, I'm not the same man who loved Meg before. That man died on Shadow with all those other innocents. And he isn't ever coming back. Meg was smart enough to figure that out, and so was I."

Mal thought for a long moment. "You don't seem like a hollowed out man to me." He offered.

"Perhaps the void is being filled in another way now," Jim said. "I suppose a man can't stay dead forever, if he's gonna keep walking about in the 'verse. I'm not proud of what I did, but I've got life enough in me to be doing something else now. The only thing constant is change, it's said." Meeting Mal's eyes, he said, "I know your people were on Shadow. If you want me to leave the ship after this is over, I will. But I love my niece, and if you have it in you to allow it, I'd very much like to stay."

"Can't say as I feel very forgivin' to anyone who destroyed my home," Mal said honestly. "But I've got a new home now, and I conjure you're a part of it. You've done nothing since joining my crew but be a good hand, and that's not nothing. So, I expect I'll be keeping you on, long's you're willing and Anya's happy. That child means a great deal to me, and I'd not send away her blood kin if you don't give me cause. You help me and mine, and we got no problem. Dong ma?"

Jim's relief was palpable. "Think I can do that, sir," he said.

"Good to know," Mal said, settling back into his bed more comfortably.

Just as he was beginning to drift off, River and Adam came into the room. "Daddy!" Adam exclaimed. "They said they've got all kinds of ice cream here, and that tomorrow afternoon, after they take out the thingies, they'll let me have some, maybe, if I do good!"

Mal smiled, hugging his son tightly. "Did they, now?' he said.

"Yep," Adam said. "The doctor's real nice. Not as nice as Uncle Simon, but he's nice enough. And the nurse said she thinks I'm a brave little boy."

"And so you are," Mal said, kissing the tip of his nose.

Adam grinned. "Did you like the doctor, Daddy?"

"He hasn't come to meet me yet, though I conjure he'll be along any time." Looking at the clock on the wall, Mal asked River, "Is everything else going according to plan?"

River nodded. "I need to leave Adam here with you for a little while, so that I can find the exit and disable the alarm. Zoe and Jayne are ready on my signal, but of course, we'll have to wait until the unit is empty tonight to actually get what Simon needs."

Mal nodded. "Good. I think Jim and I can keep Adam company until you can get back. Be careful, bao bei."

River smiled, kissing Adam's cheek. "Always, ai ren," she replied. "Be back in a bit."

As she walked gracefully out of the room, Mal's eyes followed her, praying that this time, everything would go according to the plan for a change.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	12. Chapter 12

**Crash Course**

**Part XII—Mothers and Children**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: River runs into a complication, and Mal has a consultation with the doctor.

XXXXXXXXXX

River walked down the corridors of the hospital, mentally matching her surroundings with the schematics she had studied with Kaylee. To the casual observer, she looked like a woman nonchalantly out on a stroll, taking a brief break from the passive waiting game that was so often a part of a hospital stay. But River was far from nonchalant, her mind working and reworking possible scenarios for escape if something should go amiss. She knew it would be a virtual impossibility to get Mal and Adam out of the hospital in the event of a mishap with Simon's plan.

Alert to her surroundings, she found the exit she sought, and glanced around quickly to ascertain if anyone was close enough by to see what she was about to do. Satisfied that she was alone in the small corridor, she flattened herself against the wall to avoid the ever-present eye of the security camera, and examined her options. Quickly seeing a way to disable the camera long enough to work on the fire alarm, she backed up and took a quick running leap, catching the frame that held the camera in place. She angled the camera to face the far wall of the corridor, assuming that whoever was manning the security station would be less apt to notice a strange view than static if she should cut the camera completely off.

Dropping silently back to the floor, she retrieved the small clippers from her pocket, and set to work on the fire alarm mechanism. In short moments, the job was done, and the alarm was disabled. Pleased that she had been able to do it so quickly, she leaped back up to the camera, and readjusted the angle to its correct position, knowing even as she did so that Jayne would more than likely just shoot it when he and Zoe came through the door later. Finesse was not Jayne's strong suit, she thought with a hint of amusement.

Slipping the clippers back into her pocket, she turned to leave the corridor, and walked back the way she had come. Relieved that the first part of Simon's plan had worked well, she began to worry, as she had done since Mal's accident, that she might be wrong about his chances of recovery. Thus distracted, she did not see the woman until it was too late.

"River?" the woman called, in utter astonishment. "River, is that you?"

River looked up slowly, her heart hammering disconcertingly in her chest. "Hello, Mother," she said.

XXXXXXXXXX

Kaylee watched with an aching heart as Daniel's seizure gripped him yet again. "Can't we just give him a little of the dilantin, Simon?" she asked, desperate to do anything to stop the cruel punishment to her son's body.

"I can't, Kaylee," Simon said, his voice cracking with emotion as well. "If everything goes as it should, I'll be doing the surgery tonight, and he can't have anymore dilantin if I'm going to anesthetize him. The combination of the drugs could possibly be lethal. The best we can do is make sure he doesn't harm himself during any seizures today, and hope that they will be few and far between."

As he spoke, he held Daniel loosely, confirming that he was not in any immediate danger. Kaylee stroked her son's downy hair as the seizure ended. "That one weren't so bad," she whispered softly, whether to convince herself or the baby, Simon was unsure. Taking the child from Simon's arms, she cradled him to her own chest. "He'll be hungry when he is more alert," she said sadly.

"I know, ai ren," Simon said. "But we can't feed him today for the same reason. I'm not sure how the anesthesia will affect him, and we wouldn't want him to aspirate during the surgery. It's better that he have an empty stomach."

As if in protest, Daniel opened his eyes and made a small whimpering sound. "I know, little man," Kaylee crooned. "I know you're hungry, and tired, and sore. But, Daddy's gonna fix it all up soon. Ya' just gotta hold on 'til then, 'kay?"

The baby looked up at her with green eyes that matched her own, his brow wrinkled as if he were seriously considering her words. He snuffled discontentedly, and she began to rock him gently back and forth, humming a lullaby her own mother had sung to ease her hurts when she was small.

Simon watched them, the lump in his throat growing by the minute, as Daniel's little body relaxed against his mother's breast. "What's that song you're singing?" he whispered as Daniel's breathing evened out in sleep.

Kaylee looked up at him, surprised by the question. "It's called 'The Nightingale'," she answered softly. "Thought everybody knew that one. Been around for near 'bout forever, I think."

"I've never heard it before. It's beautiful," Simon said.

"What did your mama sing you to sleep with?" Kaylee asked, curious now.

Simon sighed. "I don't remember. I think perhaps she didn't sing to us. At least, I never remember hearing her sing." He frowned as he thought back over his earliest memories. "I know she never sang to River. I was old enough when River was born that I would have remembered that, I think."

"Maybe she just weren't much of a singer," Kaylee suggested kindly, sensing her husband's emotion. "Not everybody can carry a tune, you know. I'm sure she did something else just as good to calm you down when you were upset."

"Yes, I'm sure," Simon said, though his tone indicated that he was not. "Regardless, I'm here now, and my son has a mother who sings beautifully." He leaned down to kiss Kaylee softly, careful not to press against the baby. "Think I'll go to the infirmary, and get everything set up. The sooner we can begin the procedure, the better."

XXXXXXXXXX

"What…what are you doing here?" Regan Tam said, her hand resting on the bosom of her blouse in shock. "Where have you been?"

"I could ask you the same," River replied steadily, stepping aside to let a technician pushing a patient on a gurney pass through the hallway.

Regan looked distractedly after the gurney. "I…I had a board meeting," she said. "I serve on the Board of Directors for the hospital. I often come down to the Pediatric unit after a meeting. I used to volunteer here when you were little." Her words trailed off, the shock of actually talking to her daughter almost too much to bear.

"I remember," River said quietly. "You never brought me here, but I remember."

Regan reached out belatedly to touch her, but River flinched away, involuntarily betraying the depth of her ambivalence. Regan's hand dropped uselessly to her side. "Are you all right, River?" she asked quietly. "Are you in some kind of trouble?"

River laughed mirthlessly, the sound abrupt and chilling. "Why ever would you assume that, Mother?" she said.

"You just look…different," her mother answered helplessly. "Harder, somehow."

"Perhaps that's because you haven't seen me since I was fourteen, Mother," River said flatly.

"Have you been on Osiris all this time?" Regan asked. "And is Simon…"

River sighed and began walking down the hallway, Regan trailing in her wake. "Don't walk away from me, River," Regan pleaded, something in her voice making her daughter's step falter. "Your father and I have been so worried. When Simon disappeared, and they told us that he had taken you …somewhere, we looked everywhere we thought you might be, but there was just no trace. No one would talk to us, no matter what we offered. We thought….we thought that you must be dead. What else were we to assume when you didn't contact us?"

River wheeled around, her long, dark hair whipping with the motion. "Don't you dare make this about what we didn't do, Mother," she said with a fierceness Regan had never seen in her daughter. "Simon did what he thought was right. He saved me from the Academy, and gave up everything he had to keep me safe. Father had told him he wouldn't come for us if Simon persisted in trying to help me, and Simon believed him. He found us another home, and another family who took us in, and made us feel safe again. And I won't have you say one word against any decision of his. Dong ma?"

Regan stepped back, startled by the vehemence of her daughter's words. "We didn't know, River," she said quietly, with as much dignity as she could muster. "How were we to know that you needed us when you were at the Academy? Even now, I have no idea what must have happened to cause you such pain there. Up until recently, when that prison break occurred on Salisbury, and some of the other Academy students came forward with their horror stories plastered all over the Cortex, we had never heard anything to substantiate what Simon had said."

"That's just the point, Mother," River said tiredly. "You shouldn't have had to hear any 'substantiating' information. You should have trusted your son, like he trusted me. Why would he have lied about such a thing? Couldn't you see how desperate he was?" Tears welled in her eyes as she looked at Regan, the years of pain and loss too much to face in this moment. Pulling herself together with a tremendous act of will, she said, "I have to go, Mother."

"Wait," Regan said. "Please, wait. Just tell me where I can find you to talk with you again. Please, River."

River hesitated for a long moment, torn between the two disparate things that she should do. Mal needed her and Adam needed her, and her mother would do nothing but complicate things now in a possibly dangerous way. Weighed against that knowledge was the certainty of her mother's yearning and sorrow, which rolled across River in waves as the woman stood awaiting her next words. Finally, unable even after all that had happened or failed to happen between them to abandon her mother in the cool corridor of the hospital, River looked at her bleakly. "Come with me. We'll do our talking now."

XXXXXXXXXX

Dr. Chin smiled at Mal encouragingly. "Everything we've done seems to indicate that you are an excellent candidate for the procedure, Mr. Bowden. And you're quite fortunate to have such an enthusiastic donor." He reached forward to ruffle Adam's hair. "With Adam's birth mother's consent, we should be able to proceed in the morning."

Mal handed Adam over to Jim, hoping the boy was not reading the conflicted feelings Mal had for the man after their earlier conversation. Barely able yet to process his own thoughts in any reasonable fashion, he was certain that they would be nothing but confusing to his son.

"It's lovely to see such a happy little family," the doctor said. "We've found in our research that being in a committed, long-term relationship is conducive to the recovery process. And the truth of the matter is, Mr. Bowden, that you're going to need all the support and encouragement you can get. This is a long road you're embarking on, and even with the best of medical care that we can provide, you're looking at possibly months of intense physical therapy. And that is if the procedure is effective."

"I understand, doctor," Mal said soberly. "And what exactly are the chances that it will be?"

"There is a great chance that there will be some positive effect. Almost all our patients experience some improvement. But the chances of making a full recovery are somewhat less than impressive. About fifty percent of our patients regain the use of their limbs."

Mal nodded in acknowledgement, having heard the same estimate from Simon. "Anything I can do to up those odds?" he asked.

"Maintain a positive attitude," Dr. Chin said. "Other than that, you've already done what can be done. You've come to the best hospital in the Core for dealing with traumatic injury. And you've brought a viable donor with you. The rest is up to the fates."

"And your surgical skill," Jim chimed in, playing his part well.

Dr. Chin smiled. "I promise you, sir, I'll do the very best I can for your partner."

"Good to know," Jim said, making a show of laying his hand possessively on Mal's shoulder while Mal tried not to squirm away.

Dr. Chin said, "It would probably be best to get Adam back to his room now, so that both of you can get some sleep. Adam's surgery will be the first one on my schedule tomorrow morning, so we'll be starting bright and early. If you wish, I can call a nurse to take him back to his room."

"No," Mal said quickly. "My…his mother will be here in a few minutes to get him. He'll be fine here until then."

"As you wish," Dr. Chin said. "Until tomorrow then." So saying, he bowed slightly, and left his patients to get some rest.

XXXXXXXXXX

River pulled her mother into Adam's hospital room. "At least here we can have some privacy," she said, motioning for her mother to sit on the bed.

"I don't understand. Whose room is this?" Reagan asked.

River took a deep breath. "This is my son's room."

"Your…son?" Regan asked a little breathlessly. "You have a son?"

"Yes," River replied. "A son, and a husband, and another child on the way, Mother."

Regan looked as if she might faint, and River waited for her to regain a modicum of composure.

"I know there is much that needs to be said, but I have limited time to explain everything. So I would ask that you go home now, and say nothing of this to Father. I have my child and husband to tend to, and I cannot take the time now to catch you up on the last several years. You will be able to find me here tomorrow. I promise I will explain everything then."

At Regan's resistant look, River sighed. "Trust me, Mother. For once in your life, trust your child. I swear to you that I will be here. My son will be recovering from surgery. Where else would I be?"

Regan twisted the rings on her fingers nervously. "I want to believe you, River, but…"

"Then believe me, Mother," River said abruptly. "But, please, say nothing to Father for now."

"Your father is not on Osiris," Regan said. "He's attending a conference on Ariel. I don't expect him back for three days."

"Good," River said. "That saves you the trouble of trying to hide your shock." Glancing at the clock on the wall, she said, "You really have to go now. I'm sorry."

Regan looked at her daughter with hopeful eyes. "Do you know if Simon…"

"Simon is alive and close by," River said. "When you return tomorrow, I'll tell you more." She reached out impulsively to squeeze her mother's hand, and Regan grasped it like a lifeline. "Go now," River said.

Regan nodded, unable to speak, and walked out the door and down the corridor in a daze, unsure if what she had just seen was the kindest reality or the cruelest of dreams.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	13. Chapter 13

**Crash Course**

**Part XIII—Insomnia**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: On the night before surgery, sleep doesn't come easily for anyone.

XXXXXXXXXX

Arranging her face into a smile, River stepped into Mal's hospital room.

"Hey, darlin'," Mal said over the top of Adam's squeal of delight. "Was gettin' a little worried. Everything all right?"

"Fine," River lied, not wanting to tell her husband on the eve of major surgery that her mother had made an appearance. "Things just took a little longer than I had thought, but everything's set now." She reached out to take Adam.

Mal glanced at the clock on the wall. "Bein' as how we're a little behind schedule, maybehaps Jim should take Adam back to his room, so you can go ahead and meet up with Zoe and Jayne. Nursing shift's changing in a few minutes. Should keep 'em busy long enough to do the job."

River nodded, and handed Adam over to Jim wordlessly. Adam balked at the change. "Wanna go with Mama," he said petulantly, very tired from his long day in the hospital.

River leaned over to kiss his cheek. "I'll be along in a little while. By the time Mr. Jim has read your story, I promise I'll be back, okay?"

Adam scowled, so much like his father that it was almost comical. Forestalling further argument, Mal said, "Hey, don't I get a good-bye kiss?"

His attention diverted, Adam doled out kisses to both parents. "'Night, Daddy," he said, yawning widely.

"'Night, little one," Mal replied. "Be good for Mr. Jim, and Mama will be there in a bit."

As the door closed behind Jim and Adam, Mal eyed his wife critically. "What's going on? And don't say everything's fine. Something happened."

River sighed. "I thought I was supposed to be the Reader," she said tiredly. When Mal just looked at her expectantly, she said, "Mother's here."

Mal blinked rapidly, surprised by the untimely development. "Your mother?" he asked, though he knew it was a stupid question.

"Yes," River said miserably. "I met her in the hallway. She…she recognized me."

"Then what happened?" Mal asked, his heartbeat increasing uncomfortably.

"Nothing really," River said. "I told her to go home, and that we'd meet again tomorrow."

"And you expect she's gonna just do that?" Mal asked incredulously.

"She will," River said confidently. "My father's away on business. There's no one else for her to talk to. She'll wait until tomorrow."

"You sure about that?"

"Yes," River said, moving restlessly around the room.

Mal thought for a moment, and realized that whether or not River was correct in her assessment, there was little that he could do in his current condition to alter the circumstances. Sighing, he asked softly, "Are you all right? With seein' her and all?"

"I don't know," River answered honestly. "Never expected to. Not prepared." She crawled up into Mal's bed and curled herself into his arms, needing the warmth of him next to her for just a moment. Mal stroked her back, having no idea what to say to make the situation even slightly better. But the touch was enough, and River drew her strength from him as she could. Sliding back out of his embrace, she said, "Regardless of Mother, we need to get the equipment for Daniel. I have to go, before the shift change is over."

She reached the door before Mal called after her, "Love you, bao bei."

Giving him a quick, pained smile, she replied, "Love you too."

XXXXXXXXXX

Zoe waited patiently for River's signal, feeling a little lightheaded from standing so long in the little alcove. Truth be told, she was not really up for this mission, still weakened from blood loss and such, but she knew, as always, what needed to be done, and she was fully prepared to do it. Jayne leaned against the wall beside her, seemingly uninterested in his surroundings, but actually taking everything in with his keen senses. "Think somethin's gone pear-shaped?" he asked quietly.

"No way to know, 'til we hear," Zoe said calmly.

As she spoke, River's voice filtered into her earpiece, telling them that the corridor was clear. Zoe pulled open the fire exit door, and slipped stealthily into the hospital. Jayne, right behind her, took out the camera, his gun making a slight popping sound that went unnoticed. They met River at the end of the corridor, and made their way without words to the pediatric surgical suite where Simon's equipment could be found. River moved quickly through the equipment there, matching the mental picture Simon had provided with the actual equipment until she found what she sought. "This should be everything," she whispered, putting the last piece of machinery into Jayne's duffel bag.

"See anything else that may be of use?" Zoe asked, eyeing the medicine dispenser in the corner of the suite. Well aware that Mal's recovery was bound to be slow and arduous, she thought that any extra coin they could acquire would probably be for the best, and the Ariel heist had been very profitable to them until ransoming Wash and Mal had taken what they had acquired. "Ain't got a lot of time, but maybe we could spare a few minutes."

River nodded, examining the lock on the dispensary carefully. "It's electronic," she said after a moment. "Can't be picked."

"Move," Jayne said, shooting the lock off the door easily.

Zoe smiled, thinking not for the first time that Jayne was the man for the job when the straightforward approach was appropriate. River read the labels on the vials, and quickly chose the ones she thought would be of the most value. Finding some things that Serenity's own infirmary could use, she stuffed them into the bag as well.

Hearing the sound of people approaching in the hallway, Zoe said quietly, "Best we go now."

River nodded, and Jayne put his gun in the duffel bag, slipping it onto his shoulder. River left first, and in a few minutes, she confirmed that the hallway was once again clear. River headed back to Adam's room, while Zoe and Jayne walked casually down the corridor to the fire exit and slipped silently into the night.

XXXXXXXXXX

When Jim stepped back into Mal's room, he saw that Mal was still sitting up, anxiously awaiting word. "Everything's good," Jim confirmed. "River says it went without a hitch."

Mal breathed a sigh of relief. "Well now, that'll be a first," he said wryly, as he leaned back against his pillow.

Jim nodded in agrrement, settling down in the chair beside Mal's bed to go to sleep. "Hope the little fella's are both gonna be all right," he said.

"Simon's a good doctor, and this Chin fella seems on top of things too," Mal said, adjusting his covers more comfortably.

Silence fell as both men tried to sleep. But sleep did not come for either. Jim, disturbed by the memories dredged up by his earlier conversation with Mal, stared at the wall as he had done for countless nights since the war. While Mal had reacted much more mildly than he would have thought possible, Jim knew that the man was far from forgiveness. The thought pained him, as he had come to respect the Captain for the way he dealt with his crew and the honor that seemed so inherent in the man. For a man who made his living as a thief and smuggler, the Captain had a strange sense of nobility, and Jim was drawn to it. He was not so naïve as to think that the Captain could simply forget his role in the destruction of Mal's homeworld, but he clung to the hope that, in time, perhaps he could prove to him that he was not the same man who had done such a reprehensible thing in the name of the Alliance. Comforting himself with the thought that at least the Captain had not demanded his immediate departure, he closed his eyes and tried to stop his inner demons from plunging him into a hell he knew all too well.

Mal, for his part, stared at the ceiling, worrying about Adam and Daniel, and his own surgery in the morning. He worried, too, about River and her mother, and the feelings that must be churning in his wife at this very minute. And, acutely aware of the man lying in the chair beside his bed, he studiously avoided thinking about the things he'd discovered about Jim's past, unwilling to delve too deeply just now into his own feelings on the matter. A man could only take so much at one time and maintain any hold on sanity, Mal thought wearily, closing his eyes and praying for, if not sleep, at least a little peace.

XXXXXXXXXX

Regan Tam lay staring at the canopy over her huge bed, her thoughts in tumult. Though Gabriel had long ago given their children up for dead, Regan had always held to the tiny spark of hope that they were somehow alive. And tonight, seeing the confirmation of that long-held hope had been a shock to her system. She was profoundly grateful that Gabriel was away on business, knowing she could not have hidden the depth of her feelings from him. Since the children's disappearance, Gabriel's life had proceeded much as before. She knew he grieved for them, but he still went to work and provided the kind of life to which they were accustomed, still had meetings and social exchanges, was still a member of several clubs. Regan, however, had been unable to continue with her normal life. Withdrawing her name and presence from all her various charities, she had become a virtual recluse. Seeing other mothers exulting over the exploits of their children was too painful for her, and she rarely attended any social event with her husband unless forced to do so. The only place she went that had been a part of her previous life was the hospital. Holding to the wild hope that Simon would someday reappear there to reclaim his old job, she stayed on the Board of Directors, and wandered through the corridors aimlessly on her visits there. Up until today, she had thought such a pursuit was useless, but still she had persisted. And today, that persistence had paid off.

River had seemed so harsh, so very unlike the girl Regan had known. The daughter she knew moved through life with a dancer's grace and an unencumbered spirit. The woman she had become was not so light of soul, and Regan was almost afraid to know what had caused such a change.

And she harbored another fear, though she had never spoken of it to a soul. Regan had the chilling feeling that Gabriel, for all his efforts to find the children, had not really wanted them to be found. Regan had dismissed such treacherous thoughts from her heart, but now that she knew where to find River again, the thoughts returned full force. It was hardly something that she could confront Gabriel about, but she was uneasy about it nonetheless. She had not known that Gabriel had told Simon he would not come for him if he was in trouble again, but hearing River say it, she knew instinctively that it was true. It was just the sort of thing that she could envision her husband doing, but she did not understand it at all. She loved the man, and yet sometimes she felt she lived with a stranger. And the real question confronting her now was, how would her husband react to the return of his children?

She closed her eyes and prayed to a god she hardly believed in to help her see the right path to take come morning.

XXXXXXXXXX

River lay with Adam nestled comfortably by her side, looking down at the sleeping face of her child. Tomorrow night he would not be able to sleep so, curled into her warmth, she thought with more than a little apprehension. The doctor seemed competent, and Mal had thought so as well, but she could not control the stab of anxiety she felt about both of her men lying under the surgeon's knife. She supposed it was the natural way of a mother to worry about such things.

That thought led to disturbing thoughts of her feelings for her own mother. Filtered through the passage of time, her mother's actions, or rather the lack of action, had taken on a different meaning to her. Being a mother herself now, she found it unfathomable that Regan Tam had not done more to protect her children when they most surely had needed her protection the most. The adult River could hardly imagine the choices which must have been made and the cost to the woman herself. She had bitter knowledge of what it had cost her and Simon, but the cost to Regan must have been incalculable. And for that, River could pity the woman, and possibly walk away without more than a backward glance. But the child in River wanted her mother, as any child does, and she hated the wanting because it was painful and raw, even after all the years had passed without her in their lives.

And she worried about Simon. His feelings for their parents were even more conflicted, and she could barely stand to introduce such an emotional reunion into his life right now, while his own son's health was in question.

She lay on Adam's bed, wishing that Daniel had never been ill, and the shuttle had never crashed, and her mother had never found her in a hospital corridor on Osiris. Knowing such wishing was childish and useless besides, she angrily wiped the tears away from her face. Tomorrow she must be strong, and tonight she would begin the process, she thought with the single-minded determination that had kept her alive until now. She would be the mother her child needed, the wife her husband desired, and the sister her brother wanted. And as for being a daughter, well, that remained to be seen.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	14. Chapter 14

**Crash Course**

**Part XIV—Waiting **

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playing in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Three surgeries and a few conversations occur.

XXXXXXXXXX

Simon assembled the various pieces of equipment for Daniel's surgery, pleased to see that River had gotten everything needed and more besides. Setting the additional things aside, he turned to Zoe. "I'll need you to scrub in, if you would," he said kindly. "You have the steadiest hands other than my own, and I want Daniel to have the best I can offer."

Zoe nodded, immediately beginning to get herself ready, as Simon called for Kaylee to bring Daniel to the table. Blessedly, the child was asleep, worn out by the seizures that had plagued him on and off for the entire day. Having already calculated dosages and prepared the injections needed, Simon quickly attached Daniel to the monitors and administered the anesthetic.

Turning to Kaylee, he said gently, "It's best you wait outside now, ai ren."

Kaylee nodded, moving to the outside of the infirmary and pressing her nose against the glass.

Simon took a deep breath, and became the surgeon he needed to be instead of the father he was. Shaving the soft down from a small area of Daniel's head, he looked up at Zoe. "Ready?" he asked.

She simply nodded, picking up a swab to blot the area as Simon made the small incision into Daniel's scalp. Using the tiny saw River had retrieved from the pediatric unit, Simon cut through bone to expose the area which needed repair. Carefully lifting the small skull fragment out, he put it on the tray Zoe provided, and turned back to his work.

Zoe watched carefully, providing suction to the site as needed, as Simon began the meticulous work of reconstructing the malformation. Standing under the bright light, Zoe began to see spots of black, and she swayed a little. Simon looked up quickly, just in time to see her slump to the ground in a boneless heap. "Get Jayne and Inara," he yelled at Kaylee, unable to take his hands away from the site of Daniel's problem. "We need help, now."

XXXXXXXXXX

A commotion in the hallway startled River into full wakefulness. "Sorry, ma'am," a security guard said, as he burst into the room. "There's been a theft in the pediatric unit and we just need to make sure everyone's safe."

River nodded, trying to look appropriately frightened. "We're fine," she answered. "No one has been in here."

The guard checked the room thoroughly. "Don't mean to imply you ain't tellin' the truth, ma'am," he apologized. "But if'n there was a criminal in here, he or she might be makin' you say that."

River smiled encouragingly. "It's all right," she said. "I understand you're just doing your job."

The guard smiled gratefully, quite unaccustomed to such excitement on his shift. Ducking his head, he said, "I thank you kindly, ma'am, and I hope your little one there will be just fine." So saying, he left the room and headed down the corridor in search of the perpetrator.

Adam stirred restlessly. "Everything shiny, Mama?" he asked, his words slurred with sleep.

River kissed his forehead. "Everything's shiny, baby of mine," she said softly.

XXXXXXXXXX

Inara took in the scene in the infirmary, and her mouth went dry at the sight. "What do you need me to do?" she asked immediately.

"Scrub in," Simon said, not able to even look up at her. "Zoe passed out, and I need a surgical nurse."

Inara nodded, running to the sink to prepare herself. She had done this on rare occasions before, but never with one of Serenity's children. Offering a prayer to Buddha that she would be able to help, she moved quickly to the table and took up the suctioning equipment.

Jayne lifted Zoe onto the other table, and looked at her carefully. "Any idea as to why she passed out?" he asked worriedly.

"None," Simon said shortly. "But she'll have to wait. I can only look at one patient at a time."

"Course," Jayne said gruffly. "Anything I can do to help?"

Simon's tone softened. "You've been very helpful in getting her up on the table for me. I'll see to her as soon as can." He paused, feeling something else was needed. "I'd appreciate it if you'd wait with Kaylee. She's pretty shaken up."

Jayne nodded, grateful for something to do, and stepped outside to stand beside Kaylee. Pulling her into an embrace, he held her as the minutes continued to tick by. Minutes turned to hours, and he maneuvered Kaylee to a chair when he felt her legs begin to tremble.

"Seems like it's takin' a long time," Kaylee said shakily.

"Reckon that's to be expected," Jayne said. "Doc's doin' some delicate work."

Kaylee nodded, and laid her head on Jayne's massive shoulder. "Don't know what I'll do if it don't work out," she admitted softly.

Jayne's arm tightened around her. "It'll work out. Little squirt's a fighter, and the doc's a regular wonder at fixin' us up. Don't worry none. That child will be just fine."

Kaylee smiled weakly, and twisted her wedding ring around her finger nervously. "I know you're right," she said. "Thanks for sayin'."

"Ain't said nothin' but the truth," Jayne said roughly, uncomfortable with the tender moment.

XXXXXXXXXX

As daylight came to Osiris, Simon and Inara stepped out of the infirmary, stretching backs that had been bent over their work for the entire night. Kaylee rose to hear the news, and Simon smiled tiredly. "Daniel's fine," he said. "The surgery went very well, and I expect he'll make a full recovery. We'll just have to monitor him for a few days, but everything looks good."

Kaylee burst into tears of relief as Jayne asked, "What about Zoe?"

"She was bleeding internally," Simon said. "Not much, but she must have been bleeding since the crash. The meds I gave her to boost blood production masked the symptoms, but I found the bleeder, and repaired it. She should be fine now." Smiling at Inara, he added, "Thank you for all your help. I literally couldn't have done it without you."

Inara smiled, relieved beyond measure that the ordeal was over. "I was glad to help," she said softly. "But I think, if you don't mind, I'll stick to my chosen profession from now on."

Looking down at his bloody apron, Simon said, "I can't say that I blame you."

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal lay on his stomach on the cold slab in the operating room. It felt strange that his upper half should be so cold, and his lower half should feel nothing at all, and he pushed away the treacherous thought that if the surgery was unsuccessful, this would be the way of his life forever. "You sure Adam's all right?" he asked the nurse for the third time.

She smiled encouragingly, used in her profession to comforting nervous people. "Your son is fine, Mr. Bowden," she said. "He came through with flying colors this morning, and he's resting in Recovery as we speak. As soon as he's a little more alert, we'll move him back into his regular room, and his mother can be with him."

Mal nodded, reassured for the moment. He heard rather than saw Dr. Chin come into the room. "Mr. Bowden," the doctor said pleasantly. "We've retrieved the stem cells from your son, and they look very good. The genetic manipulation has been completed, and we should be ready to begin in just a few minutes. Are there any questions or concerns before we start?"

Mal swallowed nervously. "Don't think so," he replied. "You were pretty clear on everything last night."

"Good," Dr. Chin said. "In that case, I'd like you to relax. We're just going to give you something to help you sleep, and when you wake up, it should all be over."

Mal nodded, trying not to flinch as the nurse inserted the IV into his arm. Memories of other needles and the torture associated with them flashed in his mind, and he suppressed them ruthlessly. No need to dredge up that sort of go se. What was right here was enough of a grim thought for one day, he thought, as the nurse injected the sedative into the IV. In scant minutes, he began to feel a certain lassitude overtake him, and he closed his eyes and fell into a deep sleep.

XXXXXXXXXX

River walked down to the surgical waiting area to check on Mal. Adam had not been returned to his room yet, and she had become restless with the thought of her husband's surgery taking place without her. Jim looked up from the magazine he was reading, and gave her a tired smile.

"Any news?" she asked, slipping into the chair beside him.

"Not really," he replied. "One of the technicians came out about a half hour ago to say that things are progressing well. But Chin said the surgery would last for at least three hours, and it's only been two so far." He paused for a moment, then added, "How's the little guy?"

"Still in Recovery," River answered. "He should be out in a few minutes. I just wanted to come and check on Mal while I still could."

Jim took her hand and patted it softly. "He'll be fine, River. And if there's even a hint of a problem, I'll come and get you. I know it must be hard on you to be torn between the two of them."

River nodded, comforted more by the feelings emanating from the man than his actual words. "I'm glad you're on our crew," she said softly.

Jim sighed. "Me too," he said. "Hope after all this is over, I'll be allowed to stay."

River did not bother to even pretend she didn't know what he was referring to. "He'll let you stay. Wouldn't take you away from Anya. Wants what's best for her, regardless of his feelings."

Jim looked at her bleakly. "And his feelings---are they horrible now? Does he hate me?"

"No, not hate," River answered solemnly. "Badly hurt, confused. Hard to picture how the man that did those things turned into the man he knows." She smiled thinly. "But he'll figure it out, and you'll be there to help him, just like you are now."

"And you," Jim asked softly. "How do you feel about me now that you know?"

"Always knew," River said simply. "And I understand becoming something other than yourself and the pain it brings, better than you might imagine. The 'verse is a cruel mistress, and we are often her poor slaves."

Jim's smile did not quite reach his eyes. "That was downright poetical, River."

River smiled, rising to go. "There's a certain kind of poetry to everything, don't you think?" she asked softly, leaving him to watch her graceful exit.

XXXXXXXXX

By the time River returned to Adam's room, Regan Tam was already there, perching anxiously on a chair in the corner behind the door.

"Good morning, Mother," River said, sitting down in the chair closer to Adam's bed.

Regan's mouth was dry, and she cleared her throat to speak. "Good morning, River," she said. "Your son…is he well this morning?"

"His name is Adam, and he's in Recovery right now. Should be back before too long."

"What's…what's wrong with him?" Regan asked hesitantly.

"Nothing," River said. "He is here as a donor for his father. There was an accident, a horrible accident, and my husband was injured badly. He's paralyzed, and the most optimistic chance he has of regaining the use of his legs is the cells that Adam was willing to provide."

"How old is Adam?" Regan asked, trying to picture a child of River's.

"Two years old," River said.

"Two years," Regan repeated, imagining having a grandchild for two years and not even knowing it. She fiddled with her rings nervously. "And the father…your husband, who is he?"

"His name is Malcolm Reynolds, and he's the man that took us in when Simon got me out of the Academy."

"Malcolm Reynolds?" Regan asked, her mind racing as she remembered the name from the news. "The terrorist who escaped from the Salisbury prison? The man who broadcast the Miranda Wave?"

"Yes," River replied simply. "The very same." At Regan's shocked expression, she continued, "Don't look so shocked. You must know, Mother, that there is much more to the story than the Cortex reveals."

"There always is," Regan said dryly, trying to maintain a little composure. "I'm eager to hear the rest of the story."

River sighed. "I wish I could say I am eager to tell it." So saying, she began at the beginning and told her mother the harrowing story of her Academy days and her time spent on Serenity.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	15. Chapter 15

**Crash Course**

**Part XV—Ties that Bind**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playin' in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Regan ponders her situation, and Jim gets word from Dr. Chin.

XXXXXXXXXX

Regan Tam rolled her pearl necklace between her thumb and fingers, needing something to do with her hands. "I…I had no idea," she said faintly. "It must have all been so…terrible for you. I'm sorry, River, I truly am."

River gazed at her mother with huge brown eyes. "It wasn't all terrible, Mother," she said dryly. "Mal is a wonderful man, much more so than I could have ever hoped. And Adam is a rare gift. You'll know it as soon as you meet him. I'm happy on Serenity, well and truly happy. And so is Simon."

Regan smiled tentatively. "I'm glad for you, River," she said softly. "Not everyone finds happiness, even under the best of circumstances. And yet you, with all that you've endured, seem to have found the most elusive of all things."

"Yes, I have," River said simply. The two women fell silent as each wondered where the conversation would truly lead them.

Their thoughts were interrupted by a discreet knock on the door, and a technician entered briskly, wheeling Adam's gurney into the room. "This little trooper's finally awake, at least a little," she said brightly. "Thought he might like to see his mama."

River rushed to Adam's side, forgetting completely her mother in the corner. "Hey baby mine," she said softly, stroking his thick sandy hair. "How are you feeling?"

Adam looked up at her with slightly unfocused eyes. "Fuzzy," he answered after a moment.

River laughed. "You might feel fuzzy for a little while yet," she said, leaning down to kiss his cheek. "I'm so proud of you, baby. You did a good job. I love you."

Adam smiled up at his mother, comforted to see her again. "Love you too, Mama," he said groggily. "Sorta sleepy."

"Then close your eyes and go to sleep," River said, the tenderness in her tone stealing Regan's breath away. "I'll be here when you wake up."

Adam yawned. "With ice cream?" he murmured, his eyes fluttering closed.

River laughed softly. "With ice cream," she affirmed, though he was already asleep.

Regan moved closer to the side of Adam's bed, silently asking permission with her eyes. When River nodded, she reached out to touch her grandson, her heart so full of joy at the sight of him that she could temporarily forget all the horrific things River had told her. He stirred slightly under her touch, but did not open his eyes. Forcing her words past the lump in her throat, she said, "He's beautiful, River."

River's eyes shone brightly. "Thank you," she said. "He's very much like his father."

Regan swallowed nervously. "Will I get to meet his father?" She hesitated, praying for River's acquiescence. "And see Simon and his family?"

River looked at her mother intently, a clear warning in her expression. "Not until I know that it's safe," she said firmly.

"River," Regan protested. "I would never…" She stopped, realizing that she had already done what she was about to say she would never do. "I mean, not intentionally," she stammered. "I would not bring harm to you."

She felt as if her skin was on fire, as River stared unblinkingly at her for several tension-filled minutes. She resisted the urge to drop her gaze, and stood immobile under River's fierce gaze.

River, for her part, was unabashedly reading her mother's thoughts, searching for any hint of duplicity. She sensed apprehension, uncertainty, and a tiny thread of fear weaving its way through Regan's mind, but mainly she sensed Regan's sadness and shame at having abandoned her own children in their time of need.

However, on the very edge of Regan's consciousness, River sensed something that gave her pause. "You're not sure about Father," she said aloud.

Regan flinched involuntarily. "I don't know what you mean," she began.

River interrupted her. "I see it, Mother," she said, not allowing Regan to equivocate. "You're afraid of what he might do."

Regan sighed heavily, almost relieved that she could talk to someone about her concerns, but feeling more than a little guilty she was burdening her daughter with yet another worry. "I don't know why I'm worried," she admitted miserably. "Your father is a good man. I'm probably just being irrational, but…"

"But what, Mother?"

Regan moved to sit back down in the corner of the room. "It's just that when Simon disappeared and we got word that he had taken you out of the Academy, I was frantic. And your father was so…calm. At first I attributed it to his need to be in control, to shield me from the worry he felt. But then, when we began to seriously look for you, he just didn't seem…invested somehow. As if he didn't really expect to find you."

"Or didn't really want to find us," River whispered, hearing her mother's thought so loudly it hurt her head.

Regan nodded, acknowledging the painful fact. "I asked him about it once, early on. He said that just being calm in the face of adversity did not make a person unfeeling." She paused, the memory still an ache though years had passed. Having begun to speak about the thing she'd tried to deny even to herself, she seemed unable to stop. "And then I began to think about why you had chosen the Academy to begin with, and I realized that your father had been the one to recommend it. Just a few words placed carefully here and there in casual conversation, until the thought took shape in your mind, and mine as well. And then, when Simon told us there was a problem, your father dismissed it so quickly, so resolutely. And I, …well I did what I've always done where your father is concerned. I supported his decision, ignoring the little niggling feeling in the back of my mind that thought this was not something Simon would make up." She wiped away the tears that had fallen on her cheeks. "I should have listened to my own instincts. Should have realized something was terribly wrong."

"Yes, you should have," River said, not unkindly. Though she felt her mother's guilt, she was not yet willing to negate it. The cold, rational part of her brain knew there could be no excuse for Regan's neglect, even as her compassion allowed forgiveness on at least some level. Bringing the pressing issue back to the fore, she asked, "And what is it you think Father will do if he discovers we're alive and well?"

"I don't know," Regan admitted honestly.

"Then he mustn't know," River replied flatly. Seeing her mother's pained expression, she added, "At least until we're gone."

"River," Regan implored. "You can't ask me to keep this from him. He's my husband. Could you keep something like this from Captain Reynolds?"

"No," River answered. "But I have implicit trust in Mal. Can you honestly you say you feel the same way about Father?"

"You know I can't," Regan said, defeat written plainly on her features.

River looked at her mother for a long moment, head tilted to the side in serious thought. "We need to talk to Mal, and Simon," she said.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jim stood up anxiously as Dr. Chin came into the surgical waiting room. Noting the man's careworn expression, his lunch began to churn uncomfortably in his stomach. "Been in there awhile longer than you estimated," he said, embarrassed that his voice shook a little.

Dr. Chin smiled wearily. "Yes, the time limit we give these types of surgeries is merely an estimate. Every case is different, and despite our advanced imaging systems, occasionally we find things during surgery that we did not anticipate."

Jim shifted uncomfortably. "And did you find something unanticipated in Mal's surgery?"

"No, not really," Dr. Chin said. "I was aware before we began that he had scar tissue from previous injuries that would have to be dealt with." Seeing Jim's concern, he hastened to reassure him. "Your husband is doing well. I just took a little more time than normal to address the other, older injuries as well. It looks as if the other Mr. Bowden has had his share of abuse."

"You could say that," Jim said dryly, relief making him feel suddenly lighter on his feet. "So, he's doing well, you say?"

"Very well," Dr. Chin said. "I would say at this point that we can be cautiously optimistic. As I explained in the pre-op consultation, we may not know for awhile the full effects of the treatment, but in a relatively short time, we should see some improvement. The donor cells were of high quality, and Mr. Bowden himself was apparently in general good health before the accident. You must lead an active lifestyle."

"Yes, that would be one way to describe it," Jim said, a small smile ghosting across his lips.

"That can only be of benefit to him now," Dr. Chin said. "They're moving him to Recovery now, and as soon as he's a little more alert, he'll be moved back to his room."

"How long do you think that will be?" Jim asked.

"At least a couple of hours," Dr. Chin said. "Time enough for you to have a bite to eat or rest a bit. Our cafeteria serves a mean meatloaf."

"Thanks for the tip," Jim answered. Thinking he needed to give River an update, he added, "But I think I'll pass. Might step in to see Adam for a little while though."

Dr. Chin nodded. "You might find him a little groggy as well, but I'm sure your boy will be glad to see you. I'll be by to check on both of them before my evening rounds are completed."

Jim reached out to shake the doctor's hand. "Thanks, doc, from all of us."

XXXXXXXXX

Simon and Kaylee lay on their bed, Daniel curled between them. "Woulda' thought the bandage would be a lot bigger," Kaylee whispered, running a fingertip lightly along the small square.

"No need," Simon replied softly. "Just needed a small incision. That's why I had to have the specialized equipment from a pediatric unit."

"Probably good we got it," Kaylee observed. "Serenity's gettin' to be a regular flyin' nursery." She wondered fleetingly if the Captain had ever envisioned such a thing, and smiled at the thought. "So, he's gonna be okay now?" she asked, stroking her son's chest as it rose and fell steadily.

"Yes."

Careful not to jostle the baby, Kaylee leaned over and kissed Simon soundly. "Knew you were the best doctor flyin', but I'm gettin' more impressed by the minute."

Simon marveled that despite their ridiculously sleep-deprived state and their obvious intense stress levels for the past several days, Kaylee still had the uncanny ability to clear his mind of anything except her. He smiled slowly, the boyish grin that made Kaylee's heart melt every time. "Let's put Daniel in his crib," he suggested.

Kaylee smiled, hearing the beginnings of arousal in her husband's voice. Laying Daniel gently in his crib and attaching the monitor as Simon had taught her, she slid eagerly back into bed. Molding her body to her husband's, she realized with a twinge of disappointment that he had fallen asleep, a small smile still curving his lips. "I love you, Simon Tam," she whispered.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Might need to take that client up on his offer," Jayne said, though the idea of Inara leaving for an entire week with a client was more than unsettling to him. "Ain't any tellin' how long Mal's gonna be laid up, and it'd be a pretty piece of coin, in case we don't get to another Core planet anytime soon."

Inara shook her head. "I can't leave now," she said. "Serenity is so shorthanded as it is. And I wouldn't want to be away, just in case something goes wrong."

Jayne chuckled. "What could go wrong?" he asked, pulling her into his lap.

Inara rolled her eyes. "Any number of things I can think of, and a few I'm sure I can't."

Jayne looked at her, suddenly serious. "You reckon Mal's really gonna be all right?"

Inara looked studiously at her toes. "Simon seemed to have confidence in the prognosis."

Jayne nodded. "Would hate to be in that kinda' fix," he said. "Thinkin' I might never walk again, never be inside you again…." His voice trailed off. "I coulda' been in that shuttle just as easy as them."

Inara wrapped her arms around his neck. "But you weren't," she said soothingly, nipping at his earlobe as she spoke.

"No, guess I weren't," Jayne said, recognizing her attempt at distraction, and welcoming it.

XXXXXXXXXX

Regan sat in her husband's study, staring at the fire that she'd asked the servants to lay for her. She was cold, though she was frankly unsure whether the chill came from the night air or the things she pondered. She'd spent the better part of the evening going through her husband's desk drawers and file cabinets, something she would never have contemplated two short days ago. She was unsure of what she'd hoped to find there, but she had thought that perhaps there would be something, anything that would help her figure out what to do about her new-found knowledge. If she had been looking for a smoking gun of sorts, she had been sorely disappointed. Her husband's files were unremarkable, the normal correspondence of a successful businessman. Nothing personal to define the man, nothing telling in any way.

Somehow, that was even more disturbing than anything incriminating she could have hoped to find. It was a puzzle to her that she could have lived with Gabriel Tam for all these years, loved him even, borne his two children, and still have had no real clue as to who he really was. With nothing to go on but a vague feeling of disquiet, she was unwilling to trust her own instincts. She needed a sign of some sort, she thought worriedly, or at least some kind of advice.

"Madam." The head of her household staff stepped quietly into the study, inclining his head deferentially. "There is a wave for you. It's Mr. Tam . Shall I forward it to this room?"

"No, no, that won't be necessary," Regan said, not wanting Gabriel to know she'd been in his study alone. "I'll take it in the drawing room."

"Very good, madam." He bowed and walked silently out the door.

Regan rushed to the drawing room, absently patting her hair into an acceptable shape. Activating the screen, she saw her husband. Gabriel's eyes looked tired, she thought. "Hello, ai ren," she said, her soft smile automatic. "Is everything all right?"

"Everything is fine, dear," Gabriel said reassuringly. "I just didn't have a chance to wave earlier. This conference has been rather intense."

"Well," Regan offered, "At least it will be over tomorrow."

Gabriel frowned slightly. "That's actually why I waved," he said. "There's been a little Change of plan. One of my colleagues has asked that I accompany him to a meeting after the conference is over. It would delay my getting home for a few days. You don't have any objections, do you?"

Regan tried not to show her relief. "No, of course not, Gabriel. Take all the time you need."

Gabriel smiled. "How did things go at the hospital?"

Regan's heart hammered wildly. "What...what do you mean?"

"You didn't forget to go to the board meeting, surely?" Gabriel asked, a tiny note of condescension in his tone.

"Oh, that," Regan said. "No, I went. It was…just like usual. Nothing extraordinary happened." She paused, her mouth a little dry.

Gabriel looked at her curiously. "You seem a little upset. Is there something wrong?" he asked.

The warm concern in his tone was Regan's undoing. Years of depending on this man to solve her problems, major and minor, propelled her words. "The children are alive, Gabriel. And they're here on Osiris."

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	16. Chapter 16

**Crash Course**

**Part XVI—Sensory Input**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playin' in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Gabriel Tam reacts to the news, and River visits Mal.

XXXXXXXXXX

Gabriel Tam stared at his wife, openmouthed with shock. "What?" he asked.

Regan replied, "I saw River, Gabriel. She was at the hospital, with her husband and son."

Gabriel blinked rapidly several times. "Are you certain?"

"Of course I'm certain," Regan said with a little exasperation. "I spoke to her myself. She's been through so much, Gabriel. You couldn't begin to imagine it. She told me …."

Gabriel interrupted her mid-sentence. "And you're certain she's still on Osiris now?"

"Yes," Regan said, suddenly uncomfortable with the way he was staring at her. "Her husband and child have had major surgery. She'll be here for awhile yet, I think."

Gabriel looked away from the screen, obviously checking on something. Momentarily, he returned his attention to Regan. "I'll skip the last day of the conference and cancel my other plans. I'll be on a transport tonight. And Regan, don't let them know you've told me."

"All right, dear," Regan answered, belatedly uneasy and wondering if she had done the right thing, or once again endangered her children. Pushing the thought aside, she looked at her husband's image. "Have a safe trip," she said softly.

XXXXXXXXXX

Inara knocked discreetly on the door to Adam's hospital room, and River opened it, expecting to see her mother on the other side. "Oh," she said in surprise.

Inara smiled. "I take it I wasn't the person you were expecting."

River opened the door wider to allow Inara to enter. "No, but I'm glad you've come. Adam's had a hard morning, and could use some cheering up."

Adam lay on the bed, his sturdy little arms and legs strapped down. "Hey Miss Inara," he said, a smile lighting his face.

"Hey yourself," Inara said, setting her package down on the cart wheeled next to the bed. "I hear you've had a bad time of it this morning."

Adam frowned mightily. "Doctor says I can't move my arms and legs 'til tomorrow," he said. "Told 'im I wouldn't, but he tied me up to the bed anyhow." He yanked at the restraints for emphasis.

Inara exchanged sympathetic glances with River. "Well, I imagine he did that just in case you forgot, and wiggled around a little." She stroked his cheek lovingly.

"Not like to forget it," Adam said petulantly, sounding so much like his father that it tugged a bit at Inara's heartstrings.

"Well, Dr. Chin doesn't know you well enough to know what a good memory you have," Inara soothed. "Like for instance, it would probably never occur to him that you would remember what I promised you if you do everything the doctor says." She raised one elegant eyebrow and held up the package in Adam's line of vision.

Adam's eyes widened in anticipation. "Chocolate chip mint ice cream?" he breathed out dreamily.

Inara produced two spoons. "Exactly," she said, opening the carton and spooning a little bit of the creamy confection into Adam's mouth so as not to choke him in his supine position.

Adam closed his eyes, rolling the treat around on his tongue. "Mmmm," he said contentedly. "Best thing ever." His bright blue eyes popped open, good humor restored. "Thank you, Miss Inara."

"You're most welcome," Inara said, perching lightly on the edge of the bed. "Want some more?"

Adam nodded, opening his mouth like a baby bird. Inara chuckled, and spooned another bite in. "River, you must be exhausted staying in this room all day. Why don't you take a little walk while I visit with Adam?"

River smiled gratefully. "I would like to check on Mal," she admitted. As she walked out into the corridor, she could hear Inara's soft tones mingling with her son's animated voice as the two talked happily together.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jim shifted uncomfortably in the chair by Mal's bed, wishing for the millionth time that his cracked ribs would stop their constant throbbing. Mal had awakened on and off during the night, and Jim had been unable to sleep anytime the Captain stirred. Leaning his head back, he closed his eyes, and so did not see River slip silently into the room.

She stood for a moment, surveying the scene. Jim was as tall as Mal, and looked distinctly uncomfortable scrunched in the too-small chair. She cleared her throat to alert him to her presence. He jumped up instantly, wincing as he jarred his ribs.

"Sorry," River murmured. "Didn't mean to scare you."

"S'alright," Jim said, cradling his torso protectively. "Just napping a bit. Last night was a little rough. The Captain was in and out all night long. Dreaming a lot, I think."

River nodded, and looked at Mal with concern. "Was he in much pain?"

"Don't think so," Jim answered. "Still loopy from the meds, I expect. Chin said it was normal though. When he came in for morning rounds, he seemed pleased with the way everything looks."

River didn't want to wake her husband, knowing recuperative sleep was essential, but she had hoped that she would catch him awake, feeling an intense need to see his eyes bright and alert. As if in answer to her unspoken thought, Mal's eyelids fluttered open, and he looked up at her, taking a beat longer than normal to focus on her face.

"Hey there, darlin'," he said, his drawl more pronounced because of the meds. "You're a sight for sore eyes."

River's smile lit the room. "Good to see you too, air en," she said softly, near to bursting with the relief of it. "How are you feeling?"

Mal frowned, considering the answer. "Hurt a little," he admitted. "Nothing too bad, though." He reached out to take her hand. "What about Adam?"

"He's fine," River said. "Impatient to be up and about. Dr. Chin had to order restraints this morning to keep him from moving too much."

"'Magine that was a struggle for the books," Mal said regretfully.

"He perked up quite a bit when Inara brought ice cream though," River added, smiling. "I expect that will keep him occupied for awhile yet."

"What about Daniel? We hear anything about him yet?"

"Simon sent word that he's doing well," River said. "I thought Jim would have told you."

Jim cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I did," he said in his own defense. "Three times last night. Guess it didn't stick, with the meds and all." When both Mal and River turned to look at him, he shifted nervously. "Maybe I should just leave the two of you alone for a bit."

"That'd be a kindness," Mal said, a little more roughly than he intended. To soften the tone, he added, "And I expect you could do with a walkabout."

Jim nodded shortly, and ducked out the door as quickly as he could.

River watched him go. "Very much wants to earn your respect," she said sadly. "Thinks now that he told you what he did it will never happen. Certain that when this is over, you'll make him go."

Mal scowled, not really wanting to have this conversation right now. "I told him I wouldn't," he said, not even aware of how tightly his jaw was clenched.

"Needs to hear it again," River said, resting her hand on his cheek.

"It's just I'm havin' a little trouble with it," Mal admitted. "Ain't sure I can look him in the eye and do much hand-holdin' and such."

River's smile was slight. "I don't think he wants to hold your hand."

"You know what I mean," Mal grumbled, shifting restlessly in the bed. Hissing with abrupt pain, he paled noticeably.

"Mal?" River said anxiously.

"Might best get the nurse," he ground out, cold sweat beading on his forehead. "Think maybehaps we got a problem."

XXXXXXXXXX

Zoe lay in her bunk, watching Anya fuss with her covers. "I'm all right, child," she reassured her for the hundredth time. "Just still a mite weak, is all."

Anya eyed her critically. "You look very pale," she said finally.

"Doc said that was perfectly normal," Zoe answered calmly. "No call for all this fuss."

Anya put her hands on her hips, unconsciously mirroring Zoe's usual stance. "You passed out, Mama. In the middle of Daniels' surgery. And Dr. Simon said it was because you were bleeding inside. That's a major deal."

"He also said it's all fixed now," Zoe said evenly, wondering why she was still discussing this at all.

"That's what he said when he examined you the first time after the shuttle crash too," Anya persisted. "And he was wrong."

Zoe suddenly understood exactly what was troubling Anya. "Come here, Anya," she said, holding out her arms.

"I don't want to jostle you," Anya said.

"I want to be jostled. Come here."

Anya crawled gingerly onto Zoe's bed and into her arms.

"I'm fine, Anya. Well and truly fine. Dr. Simon didn't miss anything. I expect something I did after his first exam caused the bleeding. There isn't a reason in the 'verse to think he's not right about this." As Anya curled her hands into Zoe's nightgown, she continued, "I ain't goin' anywhere. You're stuck with me for awhile yet." She felt Anya's shoulders shake as the child released all the fear and anxiety she'd been holding in a hot torrent of silent tears. Gently stroking her back, Zoe lay beside her quietly, reassuring the young girl with the steadiness of her presence.

XXXXXXXXXX

Dr. Chin spoke calmly, though he could fill the tension in the room like a physical thing. "Mr. Bowden," he said, "I'll give you pain meds as soon as I can, but I need to examine you beforehand. The meds would interfere with the reactions I'm trying to measure."

"I understand," Mal said tightly, trying to breathe through the spasms of pain radiating from his back. "Just do what needs doin'. Sooner would be better than later."

Chin nodded, pulling the sheet back from Mal's body. "Nurse," he said, "Please go find the other Mr. Bowden. I expect he'll want to be here." Turning to River, he said, "I'm sorry, but I'll have to ask you to step outside."

River started to protest, but Mal's warning look stopped her. Though impatient with the charade, she knew she could not reveal the true nature of their relationship. Sending him all the love she could with her mind, she stepped out into the hallway to wait.

"What's going on here, doc?" Mal managed to get out.

"I'm not sure, but I think you're regaining sensation in your lower half," Dr. Chin said. "If so, that's excellent."

"Don't feel excellent," Mal gasped.

"I'd imagine not," Dr. Chin said sympathetically. Sawing through Simon's plaster casts to gain access to the skin there, he ran his hands firmly along Mal's thigh. "Can you feel that, Mr. Bowden?" he asked hopefully.

Mal nodded, unable to speak. Chin continued, hitting the bruised area of the break. Mal grunted, his back bowing upward with the intensity of the pain. "I'll take that as a 'yes'," Chin said, wincing slightly himself. Inserting a needle into Mal's IV, he sent the needed pain meds into his bloodstream. "Try to lie still, Mr. Bowden. I've seen what I need to see for one evening. If your pain response is any indication, your operation has had a measure of success already. As soon as the pain subsides, we'll recast your legs with a light-weight material that should feel considerably better. And then, it looks like we might be able to start some form of physical therapy once the bones have mended."

Mal nodded wordlessly, almost dizzy with hope and relief. When he could speak again, he said hoarsely, "Thank you, doc."

"My pleasure, Mr. Bowden. I'm just sorry I had to prolong your pain long enough to do my examination."

"Truth be told," Mal said softly, "I'd have to say that's the first time I was ever happy to feel pain like that." He swallowed the lump that rose in his throat, and blinked back the tears that threatened to spill, thinking he was getting embarrassingly soft in his old age.

Dr.Chin patted his shoulder kindly. "I'll just leave you two to talk for a few minutes, until the meds kick in a little more." Smiling at Jim, who had slipped into the room while the exam was proceeding and was now grinning in obvious relief, he walked out and closed the door behind him, thinking what a fine couple the two made.

A small way down the corridor, River stood with her arms folded across her chest, swaying with the waves of emotion coming from her husband, her own cheeks wet with tears of relief for her ai ren.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	17. Chapter 17

**Crash Course**

**Part XVII—BlueSun **

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playin' in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: All hell breaks loose in the hospital.

XXXXXXXXXX

Gabriel Tam sat staring blankly at the seat in front of him until he felt the transport settle down on the Osiris dock. Glancing at his watch, he decided to forego stopping off at home for a quick shower and head straight to the hospital. With a little luck, he could be there in a half hour, accounting for the early morning traffic on the docks.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I appreciate your coming again today to sit with Adam for awhile," River said, smiling at Inara and Jayne as they settled themselves onto opposite sides of Adam's bed. "I'm eager to see how Mal did last night after I left."

Jayne snorted. "Don't know if you'll be so happy to stay with 'im when you see 'im. He was not in a very charitable mood this morning when we were there."

"Daddy hurts," Adam said simply, coming to his father's defense. "And he don't like to lie still, just like me." He tugged at the restraints he was still forced to have for emphasis.

"Doesn't," River said, correcting her son's grammar gently. "And Dr. Chin said that tomorrow, you can get out of the restraints and maybe even walk around a bit." She kissed her son's wrinkled brow, and winked at Inara. "Good luck", she mouthed silently as she headed to the door.

"I saw that," Adam called out, making Inara and Jayne both laugh at how much he sounded like his father.

XXXXXXXXXX

Regan Tam sat in the hospital cafeteria, sipping a hot cup of coffee and pondering her situation. Far from alleviating her worry, Gabriel's reaction to her news had caused her a great deal of concern, and she had to admit to herself that it was quite possible her husband had done something that would endanger their children yet again. And this time, she could not deny that she would be at least partially responsible if anything happened to them.

Thinking about what it must have cost River to confide in her, she felt even more miserable. If she told River that Gabriel was coming, she thought, River would most likely pack her family up right away and leave, thereby denying Regan her opportunity to see Simon at all. However, if she did not tell River, and anything happened to her daughter and grandchild because of it, she would never be able to live with the guilt of it. Wishing to the gods that she had hidden the truth from Gabriel for at least a little while longer, she made her decision. Finishing the last of the coffee, she headed to the pediatric unit with a heavy heart.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Excuse me . Can I help you?" the nurse on the pediatric ward asked pleasantly. As the dark-suited men turned to look at her, the nurse felt unaccountably frightened. She stammered, "I noticed that you've walked around the ward twice now. Is there someone in particular you're looking for?"

The men exchanged glances and one reached into his pocket, pulling out a small cylindrical tube. The other man put his blue-gloved hand over the top of the tube, stilling the first man's hand. "No, that won't be necessary," he said, looking down the corridor before giving the nurse a reptilian smile. "I believe we see our friend now."

The two men turned down the corridor, keeping Regan Tam in their line of sight.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Jayne and Adam were laughing so loudly that Inara did not hear Regan's first hesitant knock on the door. But the second knock was more insistent, and Inara rose to answer it. Opening the door just a bit, she saw a good-looking older woman standing there with a worried expression on her face. "Yes?" she said. "May I help you?"

Regan looked at her, startled it was not River who had answered. "Yes," she said, clearing her throat. "I'm looking for River and Adam. I'm…I'm Regan Tam."

Inara's eyes widened at the name, but she opened the door nonetheless. "I wasn't aware that River had contacted you," she said as smoothly as she could manage.

"It was all rather sudden," Regan said, obviously uncomfortable. "Where is River?"

"She's visiting Mal this morning," Inara answered kindly. "She should be back in a little while, if you'd care to wait. By the way, I am Inara Serra, and this is Jayne Cobb. We're friends of River."

"Yes, I know," Regan said. "She's told me about all of you."

It was Jayne's turn to stare in disbelief at her words. Recovering quickly, he turned to retrieve a chair from the corner of the room for Regan, and so had his back turned toward the door when the two BlueSun employees strode purposefully into the room.

Regan jumped, startled by the intrusion, as Inara, seeing their gloves, moved quickly to get Jayne's attention. The men advanced toward Adam's bed wordlessly, and Regan instinctively stepped between them and her grandchild.

"Who are you?" she asked with as much authority as she could muster.

The first man looked at her calmly. "Step aside, Mrs. Tam. We're just here for the boy and his mother."

Regan's heart beat unnaturally in her chest. "How did you know who I am?"

"Your husband sent us," he replied easily. "He wishes to remove the mother and child from danger. Please step aside."

Regan wavered for a moment. "I …I don't believe you," she said. "My husband would have contacted me if he wished to have them moved."

"Mrs. Tam, we really do not have time for this," the man said, a hint of threat in his voice. "Step aside, now. And as for you," he said, pulling the blue cylindrical tube out of his pocket, and looking at Jayne, "I would advise you to put the knife down and step away from the bed."

"Ain't like to happen," Jayne said flatly.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Gorram nurses kept comin' in to poke me with needles and such all night," Mal said in his own defense. "You'd have been irritable too." He made sure to glare at Jim for added emphasis.

Giving River a long-suffering expression, Jim turned back to Mal and said, "They explained that they were just checking sensory response. They weren't trying to hurt you."

Mal snorted, feeling more than a little justified in his frustration. Just as he was about to make a retort, River sank to her knees, giving a small, strangled cry. "River?" he cried, as Jim quickly reached to grab her. "What's goin' on, bao bei?"

River twisted out of Jim's arms, and began to rock back and forth, muttering what sounded like gibberish to Jim. He looked up questioningly at Mal.

Mal strained to hear her words, but she was too far away. "Bring her to me," he said urgently.

Jim picked the shaking woman up, and deposited her on Mal's bed, trying not to hurt the man in the process. When River's words filtered through, Mal barked, "Get to Adam's room. Now."

Not stopping to question him, Jim ran out into the corridor, leaving Mal to try to calm his wife.

XXXXXXXXXX

"You ain't gonna use that little doohickey in here," Jayne said calmly.

The BlueSun employee looked vaguely surprised by the thought. "What makes you think that?"

"Ain't gonna risk harming the boy," Jayne said. "'Less I miss my guess, he ain't no good to you dead."

A faint flicker of something indefinable crossed the second man's face. Pulling a small pistol out of his pocket, he aimed it at Jayne. "This won't harm the boy."

Regan stepped between Jayne and the gun. "If you work for my husband, then stop this immediately."

Inara took her place in front of Adam's bed, and Jayne moved beside her, the two of them standing firmly between Adam and harm.

Sighing, the second BlueSun employee squeezed the trigger with a tiny popping sound, and Regan crumpled to the floor, clutching her side. Adam screamed, and Jayne sprang forward, his large body a blur as he tried to wrestle the gun from the second man. Seeing his partner was in trouble, the first man pulled his own weapon out, and grabbed Inara, jerking her toward the door. "Drop the weapon," he said calmly to Jayne, who had managed to incapacitate the other man.

Jayne looked up to see the gun resting against Inara's temple as she tried to twist out of the first man's grasp.

"I will kill her without a thought," the man said softly. "Drop your weap…" His words were replaced by a gasping noise as Jim vaulted through the door and buried his blade hilt-deep in the man's back, severing his spine.

"We have to get out of here," Jayne said, pocketing the pistols. "No tellin' how many more might be comin.'"

Jim nodded, pulling his blade out of the corpse and wiping it on the man's suit. Quickly unstrapping Adam from his restraints, Inara picked him up carefully, trying not to hurt him any more than necessary. Looking up at Jayne, she asked, "What shall we do with Mrs. Tam?"

Jayne looked down at the woman, who still lay clutching at her side, trying to stop the blood flow. "Take me with you," she gasped. "Please."

Jayne nodded shortly. "All right. Best we take her and let Mal sort it all out later." Motioning for Jim to pick her up, he said, "Go out through the fire exit door we used the other night. Get them back to the ship. Tell Zoe to get ready to haul ass offa' this rock. I'll see to Mal and River."

XXXXXXXXXX

Gabriel Tam walked as casually as he could manage through the pediatric unit, looking for some sign as to which room housed his grandson. Peering into every open door he found, he was just about to give up and go about finding it in another way when he saw one more door hanging ajar.

Stepping into the room, he saw the empty bed and blood on the floor, and a sense of horror invaded him. Rushing to the nurse's station, he asked urgently, "Where is the patient from that room?"

She looked at him oddly. "He should be right there. Are you sure you looked?"

Gabriel resisted the urge to throttle the woman. "Yes, I have looked. He's not there."

"Well, perhaps, his mother has taken him to visit with his father, though if she did, she had no permission to do so. He is supposed to be confined to bed until tomorrow."

"I'll check his father's room, then," Gabriel said, as calmly as he could. "If you would be so kind as to tell me where it is."

The nurse typed a request into her terminal. "Says here Mr. Bowden is in Room 546. Take the west corridor, go through two sets of double doors, and turn to your right."

"Thank you," Gabriel said, turning on his heel quickly enough to flutter the papers on her desk.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jayne moved down the corridor, hyper-alert to everything around him. Reaching Mal's room, he burst inside to see River lying on Mal's bed in a fetal position while Mal tried to calm her.

"Gotta go," he said abruptly. "BlueSun hundans tried to take Adam. Jim and Inara have him headed back to the ship."

Mal nodded, his pulse beating much too rapidly. "Get River out of here," he said. "Don't think she's able to walk it alone right now."

"Can't just leave you here," Jayne said, looking around quickly, trying to think of some way to get both of them out at the same time. "Don't know when the next ones will be comin'."

Seeing the pistols sticking out of Jayne's belt, Mal said, "Give me one of the pistols, and leave me. You can come back when River's safe."

"I can take her," Gabriel Tam said, leaning against the doorway breathing heavily from moving so quickly down the corridors. "I don't think I can carry you, but I imagine I can still carry my daughter."

Stunned into silence for a moment, Mal stared at the man whose neck he had envisioned snapping on more than one occasion.

Gabriel Tam shifted nervously. Sounding very much like his son, he said, "You can always shoot me later. We really don't have time for this now." Advancing into the room, he came to a stop beside Mal's bed. "Please, let me help her for once."

Mal could see the desperation in the man's eyes. "Jayne," he said slowly, "Give her to him."

Jayne complied, and Gabriel took his trembling daughter in his arms. "You do anything at all makes me more suspicious than I am right now," Mal said menacingly, "and I will riddle you with holes. Dong ma?"

"Understood," Gabriel said, as Jayne lifted Mal from the bed. Though Jayne's movement caused every muscle in Mal's body to contract in pain, he held his gun steadily on River's father as Jayne led them out of the hospital and toward Serenity.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	18. Chapter 18

**Crash Course**

**Part XVIII—Back on Board**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playin' in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Simon has his hands full as everyone gets back to the ship, and Gabriel tries to explain.

XXXXXXXXXX

Simon stared wide-eyed at Inara and Jim as they walked up Serenity's ramp with Adam and Regan in their arms. "What happened?" he asked, amazed he could form words when he realized it was his mother in Jim's arms.

"BlueSun was there," Inara said, handing Adam over to Simon's waiting arms as soon as they reached the infirmary. "They shot your mother, and tried to take Adam."

Simon laid Adam down gently on the infirmary table, and turned his attention to his mother. She waved him away. "See to him first," she said weakly. "He's so little." Her words trailed off as she stared up at her son's face.

Turning quickly back to Adam, he smiled at the little boy. "Are you okay, little one?" he asked.

Adam looked up at his uncle with huge blue eyes. "Hurts some, but I think so."

"You're a very brave little boy," Simon praised, as he gently turned the child over to examine his back. Peeling back the bandages, he was relieved to see that Adam's incision still held, and there was no bleeding. Rolling him back over gently, he said, "You just need to lie still for me, and I'll give you something to make you feel a lot better."

"Is it gonna be a needle?" Adam asked, worry in his tone.

"Yes, it is," Simon answered, as Inara came to stand beside the boy. "But it will only hurt for a minute, and I'll be done. Think you can handle that?"

Adam blew out a long breath. "Think so," he said in a small voice. He gripped Inara's hand tightly as Simon slid the needle into his arm.

"There, that should do it," Simon said soothingly. "Just lie still for me, and in a few minutes you'll be feeling much better."

"'Kay," Adam said.

Simon turned to his mother, and pulled back the ends of her blouse to reveal the bullet wound in her side. Administering an injection of pain meds and a broad spectrum antibiotic, he gently began to probe the wound. Regan hissed, but remained still, drinking in the sight of her son with her tear-filled eyes. "I thought I'd never see you again," she said sadly. "Thought you were dead."

"Well, you were wrong," Simon said blandly. "Don't talk just now. I need to stop this bleeding."

Regan nodded, and watched Simon work, beginning to feel a little sleepy with the meds. Simon talked to Jim as he worked. "What about River?" he asked.

"Jayne's bringing her and Mal along," Jim replied briskly. "She knew what happened, apparently. Had an episode. That's why Mal sent me to Adam's room. Adam must have told her somehow."

Adam spoke from the other bed. "Wasn't me. It was her." He pointed at Regan, who had fallen asleep.

Simon stopped his work long enough to stare at his nephew. "You mean my mother communicated with River telepathically?" When Adam frowned at the word, Simon remembered he was still only two years old. "She spoke to your Mama with her mind?"

"Don't think she was trying to," Adam said, his brow wrinkling. "But she was thinking really loud when the bad men came."

Simon nodded. "Yes, I imagine she was," he said dryly. Turning back to his work, he extracted the bullet and dropped it into a metal pan with a satisfying ping. Quickly examining the area, he saw that there was no damage to any major organs, and he cleaned the wound again and bandaged it. Sparing a moment to look at his mother's sleeping face, he swallowed thickly, unsure how he felt at seeing her again in such circumstances.

He was not allowed time to really process it, though, as he heard Jayne's voice in the hallway outside.

Stepping outside, he winced when he saw the position in which Mal was hanging in Jayne's arms. And then, he gasped aloud when he saw his sister held in the arms of Gabriel Tam. "Put her down, you son of a whore," he spat out, well past shock and into something dark and ugly.

"Simon." Mal's voice was a warning.

"What?" Simon snarled, startling even Jayne with his vehemence.

"Best you calm down. River don't need all this right now." Motioning for Jayne to put him down on the couch outside the infirmary, he continued, "She's got enough goin' on in her own head, what with the hundans from BlueSun tryin' to take Adam. Is he okay?"

Simon nodded, still staring daggers at his father. "He looks fine. I gave him something for pain, and he's resting."

"And Regan?" Gabriel asked, his voice hoarse with worry.

"Your wife was shot by the bastards you sent to take River and Adam," Simon said, his voice like a razor in the silence.

River stirred in Gabriel's arms and put her down gently, as if she were made of fragile glass. "I didn't send those men." The anguish in his tone made Mal look up at him sharply, as River crawled into Mal's lap and curled around him.

"Then how did they find out we were in the hospital?" Mal demanded, leaning forward as Simon examined the incision in his lower back. As Simon lowered him back against the couch cushions, he clenched his jaw against the pained groan that threatened to escape his lips. Breathing through it, he said, "Best you be coming up with a good answer pretty damn quick. There's at least four men on this boat wouldn't mind makin' a corpse of you, and a goodly number of the women besides."

"Sir," Zoe interrupted, looking at her friend with more than a little concern. "Don't you think this conversation would be better had in the Black? No tellin' if Jim or Jayne were followed."

Mal nodded, embarrassed he hadn't thought of it himself. "Take us out."

Zoe turned briskly to comply, as Gabriel sank down onto a chair, his legs giving way under the stress. "They knew the same way they know everything," Gabriel said bleakly.

Simon moved toward him, intent on strangling the truth from him if need be, but with a look from Mal, Jayne held him back. "Go on," Mal growled, unconsciously tightening his arm around River. "Best you start at the beginning."

Gabriel gave the Captain a short, mirthless laugh. "The beginning?" he said, looking at River with haunted eyes. "You mean when I sold my child to the highest bidder?" He blew out a tortured breath. "By now, I assume you know that River is a special girl. A prodigy. Almost from her birth, I was approached by various academies and universities, all interested in teaching River. As she grew older, she began to really stand out among her peers when the standardized tests were administered. She could do no wrong academically, and more and more, I was pressured to make a decision about her education. I was attracted to the prestige of the Academy program, and finally, they offered me a deal I didn't want to refuse." He dropped his head into his hands, unable for the moment to look at his children. "They said that the BlueSun Corporation was offering a special incentive for enrollment. Offered me 30,000 shares of BlueSun stock to get River into the Academy. I don't have to tell you what that translated into monetarily. It was a fortune many times over the size of what my father had left to me. The family would be set for life. Not just Simon and River, but future generations of Tams as far as one could imagine."

Simon's hostility was like a whip across Gabriel's back. "So you sold your own daughter to them, so that they could cut into her brain and…"

Gabriel interrupted him. "I didn't know, I swear it." Running his hands through his hair, he said, "I didn't know what they were going to do. I was arrogant enough to believe that it was not unusual that they should pay such an incentive for the chance to teach River. And then, when you began to tell me that River might be in trouble, I didn't want to believe it. I wanted to attribute it to your stress level as a new doctor in such a prestigious position. It wasn't until you got her out that I realized how wrong I was."

River's voice was small and sad, startling everyone who had assumed she was still in a psychotic state. "Why didn't you come for us when you did find out? Mother said you didn't even really try."

Gabriel looked at his daughter with red-rimmed eyes. "I did try," he said quietly. "But it didn't take me long to figure out that every lead I got, someone else got as well. They were watching me, assuming at some point Simon would contact us for help. I realized that if I found you, I'd lead them straight to you." His voice cracked with emotion. "So I stopped looking."

River stared at him, her mind struggling past the maelstrom of emotion to try to see the truth of his words. "Why didn't you tell Mother?" she asked.

Gabriel sighed, struggling to maintain the last of his composure. "Your mother has never been particularly strong, River. She depends on me to handle things, always has. This was something I couldn't handle, and I knew that it would kill her to think that you and your brother were alive somewhere and in danger. More than it would hurt her to think you dead. So after a reasonable amount of time had passed, I told her that you were dead, though I knew it wasn't true."

"How did you know?" Mal asked quietly.

"Because they were still watching me," Gabriel said. "Every business trip, every wave, every time I access our personal accounts, every piece of correspondence I receive, I have no way of knowing whether it's all been seen Their resources are infinite, and I could hardly go into hiding to avoid them without alerting your Mother to the danger we were all in."

Silence fell in the room as they all contemplated Gabriel's words. Simon swallowed thickly past the knot in his throat. If his father was telling the truth, he thought, he had severely misjudged the man for all these years. He looked at River, tears shining in his eyes. She returned his gaze, communicating with her brother in the way that they had always done, drawing comfort in each other's presence. "He's telling the truth, Simon," she said softly.

"You sure about that, darlin'?" Mal asked, not quite ready to accept the elder Tams with open arms.

River stared intently into her father's hopeful eyes. "Yes, I am," she said.

XXXXXXXXXX

Regan awoke to the sound of her husband's soft snoring at the end of the infirmary bed. She looked around in surprise and saw that he was half-propped against the bed on a stool, his head resting on his arm at her feet.

Glancing around, she saw a man lying on the other bed whom she did not know, but she could guess that he was none other than Captain Reynolds, as he looked very much like the little boy who belonged to River. As if feeling her gaze upon him, Mal opened his eyes and looked at her kindly. 

"Ma'am," he said, inclining his head. "I'm Captain Malcolm Reynolds, River's husband."

"Pleased to meet you, Captain," Regan said softly, so as not to awaken Gabriel. "River's told me so much about you in the last few days. I…I hardly know what to say."

Mal smiled, the lines around his eyes exuding warmth. "Heard how you stepped in front of my boy and took a bullet for your troubles. I'm beholden to you."

Regan could well see why her daughter would love this man. "It's I who am beholden to you, Captain. For taking my children in, for protecting them when I did not." Her voice trailed off in regret.

Mal nodded, too honest to say anything to the contrary. "I love your daughter very much, Mrs. Tam, and I'm beginnin' to warm up to your son as well."

Regan laughed softly, and Mal could not help but notice how much she sounded like River when she did. "Call me Regan, Captain Reynolds," she said. Hesitating for a moment, she looked at him uncertainly. "How did…how did Gabriel get here?"

Mal chuckled. "That's a fair long tale," he answered. "And I 'spect he'd rather tell you himself."

Regan glanced down to see her husband's tired eyes looking at her intently. "Ai ren," she said, holding out her hand.

Gabriel took it like a lifeline. "There's so much I need to tell you, so much I should have said before." As he began to explain to his wife the set of circumstances that had led them to this place and time, Mal leaned back against the pillows and closed his eyes, eternally grateful that he and River had no such secrets from each other.

XXXXXXXXXX

Kaylee held Daniel to her breast as the child suckled contentedly there. Simon watched her, his mind racing with the things he had learned in the last few hours. "You're a wonderful mother, Kaylee," he said, gratitude in his voice.

Kaylee smiled. "Don't be so sure. This little one ain't big as a minute yet. I ain't had time to get the hang of it."

Simon shook his head. "No, you are," he insisted. "You're strong and capable, loving and kind. You'd go to any lengths to help your child."

Kaylee smiled at him warmly, knowing the bent of her husband's mind sometimes better than he knew it himself. "Same can be said of you, Simon. You're a fine father."

Simon sighed. "What if I'm not?" he asked. "What if I let him down?"

"You won't," Kaylee said firmly. "You don't have it in you to not help the people you love. It's what first drew me to you, you know. The way you looked after your sister." She paused for a moment, careful in the phrasing of her next words. "You ain't your father, Simon. And besides, now we know even he tried to protect you, after a fashion at least."

Simon smiled slowly. "You really do see the best in people, don't you?"

"Only when there's something good to see," she replied, switching Daniel to the other breast as he began to complain. Flipping her hair back behind her ear, she smiled up at Simon. "Speaking of fathers and sons, I think Daniels' gonna be a breast man," she said to lighten the mood. "Just like his father."

Simon couldn't help but smile, leaning over to kiss his wife's welcoming lips.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	19. Chapter 19

**Crash Course**

**Part XIX—Father Figures**

Author: just-slummin

Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. Just playin' with 'em.

Rating: PG

Summary: River helps Adam deal with current events, and Mal and Simon have a talk of their own.

XXXXXXXXXX

The ward nurse in the Pediatric Unit sat nervously looking at the surveillance tapes, while the Hospital Administrator glared at her. "I find it more than a little disturbing that a two-year-old child could be taken out of this hospital without your knowledge," he said for the third time.

The nurse sighed, knowing the man would never take her explanation as a valid one. "As I've said before, sir," she said, "we were somewhat understaffed earlier today. I didn't have a clear view of Adam Bowden's room from the desk, and apparently the other nurses were in rooms caring for other patients at the time." She gulped nervously, as the administrator scowled. "And there had been a little more traffic than usual in the hallways." Her voice trailed off as she watched the tape of Regan Tam entering Adam's room. "Well, that's Mrs. Tam," she said, trying to be helpful.

The administrator snorted. "I believe we're all well aware of Mrs. Tam's identity, Nurse. She is, after all, one of our Board Members. The real question is, who are those two men behind her?"

The nurse squinted at the grainy image. "I don't know," she answered honestly. "They walked around a few minutes, and I asked them who they were looking for, and when they saw Mrs. Tam, they followed her. I assumed they knew her."

She fell silent as she watched the men enter the room, and then, in a few minutes, another man entered. "That's Mr. Bowden," she offered timidly. The Administrator nodded shortly, having already ascertained as much. Within minutes, the nurse was shocked to see the image of Mr. Bowden carrying an obviously injured Regan Tam out, followed by a beautiful woman she did not know carrying Adam in her arms. Lastly, a large man exited the room, heading in the general direction of the surgical ward. The screen went blank. She frowned. "What happened to the two men in suits?" she asked, puzzled.

"That is what we would like to know," the Administrator said. "The tapes from the surgical ward indicate that the large man you saw coming out of the boy's room is the same man who abducted the other Mr. Bowden as well. Two patients, kidnapped from our own facility in less than an hour, two unidentified men missing, and no one seems to know what happened. It's a disgrace to our entire facility."

"Perhaps they weren't kidnapped," the nurse suggested in a small voice. "It was, after all, Mr. Bowden who was in the room with the boy and Mrs. Tam."

The Administrator looked at her with thinly veiled disgust. "Whether the child was abducted by others or taken out of the hospital by his own guardian, we did nothing to prevent it. It is my understanding that the child was confined to his bed by doctor's orders. Moving him could create serious health complications, and this hospital could very well lose its funding. What have you to say in your defense?"

The nurse closed her eyes against the forcefulness of his tone, knowing that someone would be the scapegoat to pay for the hospital's negligence, and feeling fairly certain it would be her.

XXXXXXXXXX

River sat on the edge of Adam's bed, patting her son's perpetual cowlick down while she tried to figure out what to say to him about all that had happened. "It must have been very scary for you in the hospital when the men came into your room," she said softly.

Adam nodded, his eyes wide with the memory. "They thought mean things," he whispered. "But Mr. Jayne and Miss Inara were there, and they stood in front of me, so's I couldn't see everything. And I felt better. But then, the men shot the lady, and she was really hurt."

"Yes, she was," River said. "But Uncle Simon says she's going to be just fine."

Adam stared up into the comforting face of his mother. "Is she my grandma?" he asked curiously.

"Yes, she is," River answered steadily. "And the man with her is your grandpa."

Adam thought about that information for a moment. "So, that's your Mama and Daddy?"

"Yes," River replied, her throat feeling uncomfortably dry. "They are."

Adam was quiet for a moment, as if piecing together a puzzle in his head. "You were scared of those men, too," he said softly.

"Yes," River acknowledged. "They were very bad men, who wanted to hurt us."

"Why?"

River sighed. "Because of what we can do," she replied honestly. "Not everyone can hear what goes on inside other people's heads like you and me, Adam."

Adam nodded. "I know. Even Daddy doesn't hear it, most of the time."

"That's right," River answered.

Adam frowned worriedly. "Is it a bad thing to be able to hear it, Mama?"

"No," River assured him. "It isn't good or bad. It just is what it is. But sometimes there are people who might try to use our abilities to hurt other people. And that is very bad. Those men in the hospital…they were like that. They wanted to use your reading for a bad purpose. And we mustn't let anyone do that. We have to guard our gifts, just like we guard each other, and Daddy, and all of Serenity's family. Dong ma?"

Adam looked up at her soberly. "Will they come back, Mama?"

"They might," River answered softly. "But if they do, Daddy and I will be here to stop them, just like Jayne and Inara stood between them and you in the hospital."

"Will the new baby be like us, or like Daddy?" Adam asked after a moment.

"I don't know," River answered. "We'll have to wait and see."

"Wish I was like Daddy," Adam said, in a tone so low River could hardly make out his words.

River stroked his hair, her heart breaking just a little. "I know it's difficult to be a Reader, baby. I've been one all my life, just like you. But as you get older, you can control it better, and use it when it's needed instead of all the time. Even now you've already learned how to tune some thoughts out."

"It's hard sometimes," Adam said quietly. "Makes my head hurt."

River cupped his cheek. "But you're doing a really good job with it," she reassured him. "And sometimes it's helpful to be able to read someone."

"Like when I knew where to find the shuttle because I heard Daddy," he said.

"Exactly," River said. "You saved your daddy's life, and maybe Miss Zoe's as well."

Adam smiled proudly at the thought. "I did, didn't I?" he said.

River leaned down to kiss him. "Yes, you did," she said, pulling up his covers around him. "Time to go to sleep now, baby mine. I'll see you in the morning."

As she reached to turn out the light, Adam stopped her. "Could we maybe leave it on just this once?" he asked.

"Of course," she replied calmly, knowing that her son was still badly shaken by the events he'd witnessed earlier. "Just this once. But remember, Adam, that whether we are in the dark or in the light, we're all here together."

"Yes, Mama," Adam said solemnly. "I'll remember."

XXXXXXXXXX

Having given his mother into his father's care and sent them off with Kaylee to one of the passenger dorms, Simon could turn his full attention to Mal. "So, the lightweight casts are bound to be a vast improvement over what I was able to use," he observed, as he tested Mal's feeling in his feet and legs.

"Yeah, s'pose there are some advantages to bein' in an Alliance hospital, if you discount the whole kidnapping and murder thing," Mal said wryly.

Simon snorted. "Well, there are always some disadvantages," he said, allowing a small smile to grace his lips. "I'm quite pleased with the results of the surgery," he added, getting back to the business at hand. "And frankly, I'm a little surprised that you aren't in more pain, considering your method of transport back to the ship yesterday."

"Well," Mal admitted, "I ain't exactly feelin' like rainbows and puppies just yet, but it's better today than it was yesterday." He paused for a moment. "You think Dr. Chin was right when he said everything looks good? I mean to say, you think I'll have the use of my legs again?"

"It's quite possible," Simon said, not willing to say definitively one way or another. "You have a measure of sensation already, which is of course an excellent start. And, once the bones have healed properly, we can begin to experiment a little with range of motion therapies. That should tell us a great deal about your future prospects."

Mal nodded. "How long 'til the thigh bones heal up?"

"Another six weeks or so, I'd expect from the looks of the scans I did last night. Maybe less, if I can find something to stimulate the healing process a bit."

"I'd take it as a kindness if you did," Mal said. "Can't say I'm eager to lie in this bed for six more weeks."

"Well, you certainly can't navigate the ladder to your bunk in this condition, and the passenger dorms seem a little crowded at the moment." Simon paused, working out the rooming arrangements in his head. "Of course, Kaylee and I would be glad to move back into our bunk, and you could have that room until you're out of the casts."

"Wouldn't want to put you out," Mal answered, though the thought of being somewhere other than the infirmary sounded like a little slice of heaven to him.

"Won't be any trouble," Simon assured him. "Daniel's doing well, and we don't need to be so close to the infirmary for him anymore. I'll get on it today."

Mal smiled. "I'm glad for the boy," he said genuinely. "Fair broke my heart to see him sufferin'."

Simon swallowed. "Mine too," he said in a low voice. "I can't imagine what I would have done if I couldn't have helped him." He paused for a moment, his own words dredging up something he'd been trying to suppress. "Do you belief my father's story, Mal? That he could not find a way to help us when he found out the truth about what happened to River?" He looked up at Mal with piercingly blue eyes.

Mal thought for a long moment before he answered. "River believes him," he said finally.

"That's not what I asked," Simon persisted. "What do you think?"

"I don't know your father," Mal answered as kindly as he could. "Don't know what to think, but he seemed to be tellin' the truth. I got no cause to doubt River, and if she believes him, I'll just have to be content with that."

"Her judgment could be clouded by her willingness to believe," Simon replied with a little asperity. "She's always been willing to see our parents as more benevolent than I have."

Mal nodded. "Maybehaps that's because she's always had you as a go-between. Ain't like you haven't been the one watchin' over her from the very beginning."

Simon's mouth dropped open. "She told you that?" he asked.

"She didn't have to," Mal replied. "It's fair obvious that you've always looked after her. And your ma confirmed it for me when we were laid up here alone in the night watch."

Simon sighed. "Our parents were never very….hands-on. They provided for us, gave us the best of everything materially, but they were very busy with their own lives." He paused, wanting to express himself precisely. "I always felt that they loved us, after their own peculiar fashion. We were raised in a very formal way, no cuddling and roughhousing, all very proper and sterile. But it was obvious they were proud of us, and took a certain kind of delight in us. And they were indulgent of our whims, to a large degree." He smiled briefly. "That's why River's such a brat." Mal snorted. "But when River was in trouble, Father was so…resolute in ignoring it, and so adamant for me to do the same." His words abruptly stopped, as he replayed his last conversation with his father before he managed to get River out of the Academy.

"And you felt betrayed," Mal said softly.

Simon sighed. "I expected him to listen to me, to back me up. Until that moment, it had honestly never occurred to me that if I really needed him, he might not be there."

"Must have been a hard pill to swallow," Mal said, imagining Simon's moment of panicked realization with a certain sympathy.

Simon looked at him bleakly. "I've hated my father since that moment. Through all that River has been through and all that has happened to me, one of the few constants in my life has been hating him with a passion. It kept me from asking him for help, kept me from allowing myself to consider the possibility that he had ever been a decent man. And now," his voice broke on the words, "when I'm a father myself, I find out that I might have been wrong, that I might have spent these last years hating a man who was trying, albeit ineffectively, to protect me. " His eyes glittered with unshed tears. "Tell me, Captain, what am I going to do about that?"

"I don't know, Simon," Mal answered gently. "But I'm thinkin' you'll do what you always do. You'll keep lookin' after the people that mean the most to you, and bein' the kind of man that gives what he's got to give, and maybehaps a little more than he's got sometimes. And if you had been in your father's place, I've got no doubt that you'd have found a way to help your children, bein' top three percent and all." He smiled to break the tension in the room. "But your daddy, well apparently he ain't had that particular advantage. Had to make due with what he could figure out."

Simon's snort was a sharp exclamation of pent-up emotion. "Are you saying that my father is mentally impaired in some way?" he asked with a hint of humor.

Mal shrugged, his eyes twinkling in the infirmary lights. "Gotta call 'em as I see 'em.," he said, grinning.

Simon could not help laughing in return, until his sides hurt with the release of it. And outside the infirmary door, River smiled in the shadows.

XXXXXXXXXX

To be continued


	20. Chapter 20

**Crash Course**

**Part XX—Healing Process**

Author: justslummin

Disclaimer: Just playin' in Joss' sandbox.

Rating: PG

Summary: Conclusion. The Tams make arrangements to leave, and Mal becomes mobile again.

XXXXXXXXXX

Regan Tam sat watching her daughter and son-in-law communing with each other wordlessly as Adam took his first shaky steps since his surgery. There was something so beautiful in the sight that she found her breath catching as she watched, and she wondered if she and Gabriel had once looked thus.

Gabriel, for his part, had eyes only for his grandson, as Adam's steps became more sure by the minute. He had never imagined that he would be given the opportunity of seeing a grandchild of his, much less one so full of life and love as Adam seemed to be. The lump in his throat was an exquisite ache. Aware of his grandfather's thoughts, Adam looked up at him and smiled happily. "Looks like they work okay," he said, pointing to his legs.

"It would seem so," Gabriel said, bending at the knee to get on eye level with the child. "How do they feel?"

"Wavy," Adam said after a moment.

Simon chuckled softly. "That's natural after you've been off them for a few days," he said. "Think you can make it back to your father?"

Adam nodded, walking steadily back to Mal with a huge grin. "Easy peasy," he said, reaching up to be pulled into his father's lap.

"Good," Simon praised. "No running and jumping for a few more days, but I think everything's going to be back to normal soon, okay?"

"'Kay," Adam agreed.

Kaylee wandered into the infirmary, bringing Daniel in to have the stitches in his scalp removed. Regan eagerly reached for the baby despite the pain in her side from the bullet wound, and Kaylee laid him carefully in her arms. "He looks a great deal like Simon, except for the eyes. The eyes are all yours," Regan said softly, smiling down at her grandson with open admiration.

Gabriel straightened up from his kneeling position, and winced as his knees cracked loudly. "Speaking of things going back to normal, I suppose now is as good a time as any to discuss the future, since the whole family seems to be here." He put his arm around Regan's shoulders and took a deep breath. Looking at first his two children and then Mal, he said, "Captain Reynolds, my wife and I appreciate you letting us hitch a ride when we so desperately needed one. But I suspect it's time for us to stop imposing on your generosity. It's obvious you have a full house without us to complicate things."

"You're welcome to stay on Serenity as long as you like," Mal said easily. "I don't conjure things are gonna be too pleasant for you back on Osiris, if any of what happened in that hospital was caught on tape." River squeezed his hand gratefully.

Gabriel grimaced, having thought about that problem himself. "That's a situation that Regan and I will just have to handle as best we can," he replied. "Of course, we wouldn't expect you to go all the way back to Osiris to drop us off. Perhaps we can get off at your next planetfall, wherever that is. So long as there's access to a cortex link somewhere on the planet, we should be able to transfer enough funds to get by until we can arrange transport home."

Simon spoke up. "Isn't the Alliance looking at your transactions?" he asked. "The minute you access your accounts, they'll know where you are."

"I suspect they'll know where we are soon enough anyway," Gabriel replied grimly. "And, while Serenity seems to be home to all of you, I really don't think your mother and I can begin a wandering life at this point. A little too old to take up a life of…" He paused, not wanting to name it. "….adventure."

Mal smiled at the euphemism. "Got some medical supplies to be sold on Deadwood," he said. "Think that might be a decent kinda place to be dropped off. Doesn't have much of an Alliance presence, but they got a good-sized settlement and cortex access. Be there in about a week."

"That sounds perfect," Gabriel said. "If it's all right, perhaps we could discuss some way to maintain communication, now that we've had a chance to get re-acquainted with our children and meet you and Kaylee and the grandchildren. I'd like to think that we could see everyone occasionally, if we can find some way around the surveillance."

"Might be able to come up with something. Li'l Kaylee is a right wonder at finding her way around things like that," Mal said fondly, smiling at his genius mechanic.

Kaylee beamed. "I can give it a try, leastways." Daniel began to fuss in Regan's arms, and she handed him back to Kaylee. "I think he might need his mother," she said softly.

"Sometimes we all do," River whispered, loud enough for only Mal to hear.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mal sat in the galley at the overcrowded table. Making a mental note to thank Jayne again for installing the lifts that enabled him to move freely in his ship again with the aid of a wheelchair, he looked around at the faces of his family gathered there and wondered at the peculiarities of a 'verse that would strip so much from him and still give him so much in return. He'd long since stopped believing that things balanced out on any cosmic level, but occasionally he did have to consider the possibility he may have been mistaken in that assessment. River looked positively luminous, her skin glowing with the effects of the new life within her and the joy she felt at the reunion with her parents. Mal had known that their absence had been a source of pain for her, but he had not truly sensed the extent of it until he had seen her with them for the past week. He was profoundly grateful that he had not followed his first instinct of killing Gabriel Tam on sight.

Even Simon was smiling again, Daniel cradled protectively to his chest, as he talked quietly with his father at the end of the table. Kaylee's hand rested on his knee, and Mal could not help but think of how much strength his mei mei offered her husband with the simple gesture.

Inara talked animatedly with Regan, and the older woman seemed enthralled with the conversation, having never spent much time in the company of a bona fide Companion. Jayne sat with Adam on one knee and Anya on the other, munching on a dinner roll and watching everything with an air of satisfaction.

Mal's eyes turned to Zoe, fully expecting to be met with her steady gaze, as this was the first meal he had been able to take with the crew since the shuttle accident. To his surprise, however, Zoe was looking at Jim instead, her head inclined to hear whatever he was telling her in low tones. Sensing her husband's thoughts, River rested her hand on his arm, and whispered softly, "Healed enough to move on."

He glanced up into her bright brown eyes, and answered softly, "Good to know."

XXXXXXXXXXX

River set Serenity down on Deadwood, kicking up a cloud of dust in the open field. She made her way quickly to the cargo bay, where everyone was gathered to say their good-byes to the elder Tams. Hugging her mother tightly, she whispered, "Love you, Mother."

"Love you too, baby mine," Regan answered, her eyes welling with tears at the leave-taking.

Gabriel cleared his throat as River hugged him as well. "Take care, daughter," he said hoarsely.

"And you as well," she replied, her own tears spilling down her cheeks.

Simon hugged his mother, whispering a private good-bye in her ear as Kaylee looked on approvingly. Turning to his father, he extended his hand, but Gabriel took it and pulled him in for a genuine hug instead. "I'm proud of you, son," he said quietly. "Thank you for doing what I couldn't do to protect your sister."

Simon nodded, unable to speak with the intensity of his emotion, and Gabriel released him.

Turning to Mal, Gabriel shook his hand, his proper exterior recovered. "Captain, we're grateful to you for all you've done for our family, and very pleased to call you one of our own."

Mal nodded in acknowledgement. "I'll do my best to see they're safe and happy," he said.

"Of that, we've no doubt," Regan said, kissing his cheek lightly. Whispering in his ear, she added, "And please find a way to bring my grandchildren to see me as you can."

"Yes, ma'am," he said, seeing the briefest flash of his own mother in her eyes.

As the Tams walked out into the dust of the day, River stood beside her husband's chair, holding his hand tightly until they disappeared from view. "You okay, darlin'?" he asked, seeing the tears still glistening on her face.

"Better than," she replied, leaning down to kiss him lightly. He pulled her down into his lap, heedless of the others in the cargo bay. As the crew dispersed, he kissed her deeply, feeling the pleasant weight of her in his lap, and thinking it was the most wonderful sensation he could imagine at just that moment.

River smiled. "I can imagine an even better one," she whispered against his ear.

Mal shivered pleasantly at the thought. "Best you tell me that a little later," he replied huskily. "Right now, we got a job needs doin'."

River sighed, sliding off his lap. "Aye, aye, Captain," she said as she walked gracefully away, her hips swaying in a way that made Mal almost forget the job for just a moment.

XXXXXXXXXX

With considerable effort, Mal maneuvered his body onto the bed in the passenger dorm that Kaylee and Simon had vacated in his behalf. His arms and shoulders were exhausted by the new exercise of wheeling himself around on the ship all day, and pulling himself from place to place out of the chair when needed.

He'd found it almost disconcerting that Jayne seemed to follow him around, offering all day to help him get where he wanted to go, but he supposed it was the mercenary's way of showing concern, so he tried to temper his answers accordingly. Finally, Simon had run interference for him, telling Jayne that Mal needed the exercise, as he would be in the casts for at least five more weeks before he could even think about putting any weight on his healing legs. The big man looked so crestfallen that Mal felt compelled to thank him again for installing the lifts and ramps. "Couldn't be gettin' around nowhere near as good if you hadn't thought of it," he said warmly.

Jayne had beamed like a child at Christmas. "Weren't nothin'," he'd said gruffly, though Mal could tell the compliment meant more than the man would ever say.

Now, however, after a full day of hoisting himself in and out of the chair, Mal thought wryly that maybe he should have taken Jayne up on some of the help offered. He pulled his legs more comfortably into the bunk, and lay back against the pillows to rest for a minute.

"Pushed yourself too hard," River chided gently, gliding into the room. "Always do."

Mal sighed heavily. "S'pose you're right about that," he said. "Just don't much like the thought of folk havin' to look after me, when I can do it myownself."

River smiled, slipping out of her dress and into a filmy little nightgown in two smooth motions that made Mal's mouth water just a little. She rummaged in the drawer for a moment, pulling out a bottle of massage oil. Holding it up for his inspection, she said, "So I suppose you'd rather apply this yourself than let me help?"

"Well now, some things a man needs help with," Mal said, his voice suddenly a low growl of anticipation.

"Thought as much," River whispered as she climbed onto the bed and poured some of the oil into the palms of her hands.

As his wife's hands trailed the warm liquid down his shoulders and chest, Mal closed his eyes and purred in contentment. And as she continued downward, he realized with a deep sense of joy that sensation had most definitely returned to his lower half.

River said softly, "Care to test sensory reaction a little more, ai ren?"

"Seems like the right thing to do," Mal replied, pulling her down against his lips and stealing her breath away with his kiss.

XXXXXXXXXX

Author's Note: So ends another tale of Serenity's crew. This one was a true pleasure for me to write, and I sincerely hope it was a pleasure for you to read it as well. As always, I'd like to thank especially those kind souls who took an extra moment to leave a comment, as feedback is like butter to bread. There are more stories yet to tell, but they will have to wait for another day. Until then, happy writing and reading!


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